Episode 22

[Hunting often]. This is a bit… … Ines' expression became clouded. It was clearly a sin to kill innocent animals for sport. However, this could be blamed on Luciano to some extent.

Instead of regretting not having a younger brother, Luciano treated Ines like one, and forced his only sister to do things that brothers usually do. The problem was that everything he forced her to do suited her personality well… .

Ines was good at shooting, and she also enjoyed racing horses at high speeds without stopping. Hot temper and competitive spirit were as close as blood. Even dressing up beautifully was part of her competitive spirit. Once she set a standard, she had to win by any standard. It was even better if she was the best.

Come to think of it… [I treated the horse roughly]. However, Ines' red stallion loved her master very much. So at least, I don't think she wanted her master to go to hell.

[Unkind]. If she had been born with such a good nature that she was kind to everyone, she would have chosen to spend her life in a convent rather than seeing the corrupt people of the capital. Mendoza is full of such filthy things that she would not dare to open her eyes.

Ines wrote down the flaws of her first life. No serious sins stood out to anyone. After the heart-wrenching hunt, she wrote down Luciano's name.

"…What on earth did I do so wrong back then?"

She ran the tip of her quill over her chin, exploring her own original sin.

Ortega's state religion taught that "humans are born with original sin" and that they must repent of that original sin throughout their lives in order to enter heaven. This doctrine was used to gently educate and rule the people, but she was not interested in such fundamentalist talk.

If there really is such a thing as the price of being born, I believe she paid it all with the outrageous donations she extorted from Oscar and scattered around.

So, for now, that was okay.

The pen moved again.

[Beating Oscar]. How could one not hit him after seeing his face? [Hating Oscar]. How could one not hate him? [Cursing Oscar]. How could one not curse him? [Blaming Oscar]. How could it be a sin to just blame him when you could have just killed him without blaming him?

[Oscar…] All the dark emotions and aggressive behaviors she had known in her first life were all connected to Oscar.

Oscar, Oscar, Oscar. Looking at the names that had already filled half of the paper, Ines suddenly felt annoyed. She gave up looking back and put down her pen.

If Oscar was the victim, then no evil deed could be considered a sin. So, no matter how you look at it, she had no memory of committing a sin until the moment she died.

She endured eleven years of nightmare-like persecution and oppression in the imperial court, and endured four miscarriages. She was devoted to her husband, who was plagued by venereal disease, and lived the life of a crown princess faithful to her marriage until the moment of her death… … What on earth did she do wrong here? She really, until the moment of her death… .

"… … ."

She, who was vaguely recalling the end, suddenly picked up her pen with a pale face. A rustling sound passed by her ears, sending shivers down her spine. [Suicide].

Ines stared blankly for a moment at the only thing her first and second lives had in common.

She wasn't just repeating the same life over and over again to become unhappy again. She thought so with deep pessimism, but in fact it was just a hamster wheel without reason or motivation.

"… That doesn't make sense. It's not enough…"

But if the initial motive was suicide. Because he committed suicide. Dare I say, because he died himself… … .

Every time she chose suicide in despair, didn't her life come back like a wave? As if suicide was not acceptable.

Yeah, like I dared to do something that was not acceptable.

They were all things she had chosen with the hope of an ending, but the ending itself seemed so far away that it seemed as if it was too much for her and not permitted.

He committed suicide at the age of twenty-six, becoming sixteen, and then committing suicide again at twenty, as if receiving a greater punishment this time, and so the eleven years went back from that sixteen year.

Then what next? No matter when or how I die, will I eventually go back eleven years to when I was six? Will I wander around Perez as a ghost, waiting for my parents to mate and become a child in my womb? Will I be told to repeat this until I don't die on my own…?

Ines looked around in bewilderment, then found the portrait of the Crown Prince strewn carelessly on the floor and ground her teeth.

Oscar did give him a gift: a new, concrete hypothesis that would make him even more annoying.

Who was the first to commit suicide? First, they took away my life, and then they took away my right to die properly… … .

"Ines!"

The culprit appeared before her eyes again like a ghost. With surprising speed, she crumpled the paper out of sight and threw it under the desk.

Oscar, who had been hanging out with Luciano due to Ines's ignorance, was very happy to see Ines in the living room, but then he noticed a portrait on the floor and instantly turned into something like broken glass.

It was as if what was lying on the floor was not a painting, but himself.

"Ines, why is my portrait so far away… …?"

Rather than answering, I want to rush in and strangle him right now and eliminate that dirty sprout, but no matter how much his life repeats, he is the crown prince of a country.

Ines took a deep breath as if cultivating her mind, then opened her eyes.

"I don't know. I think it probably fell off on its own."

"By itself?"

"Who would dare touch Your Majesty's portrait even with their fingertips? It is as precious as a sacred painting."

"That's true… It was a mistake on the part of the servant. I had intended to surprise you by secretly bringing it in, and we could admire the artwork together."

Oh, oh… Oscar tried to act mature and unfazed as he shook his head and let out an awkward exclamation as he watched his noble face roll around on the carpet.

And yet, his wavering gaze was directed at himself, who was spreading his wings on the carpet. He was so angry that he was about to go find the attendant who was suspected of having committed an indiscretion…

"I didn't know you'd be the first to see it. I wanted to see your surprised face."

"I am so moved to see you grow up so well. I can't believe you are going to be such a wonderful young man… ."

The plan was of no use. But just Ines' fake smile made Oscar's hardened expression melt away as if in relief.

Behind them, Luciano frowned, but she ignored him and approached them.

"There is no exaggeration in that painting. I always tell artists, 'I don't like unnecessary embellishment.' A portrait is a record. That's not a record of the real you. I like the real me. The real me."

"Yes, Your Majesty is handsome enough without any beautification."

From his large, muscular body to his magnificent pair of wings, there's nothing real about him, yet he's shameless. I don't remember him doing anything stupid to this extent, but he suddenly got impatient and was busy trying to show off in front of the girl, so it seems like he can't handle it.

It was a secret that even a few of the maids at Perez Castle knew that she had been suffering from a fever for several days and had been exhibiting various strange behaviors.

From Oscar's perspective, it was like that. Ines, who used to frequent Mendoza so often, suddenly stopped showing up, and no matter how many letters he sent, he never got a reply, even though she was cute and succinct. He couldn't stand it anymore, so he made the arduous journey to Perez Castle himself, but instead of welcoming him with shining eyes like usual, he received a cold response. And the shocking words telling him to let go of his dirty hands...

How dare you say dirty hands? If it were anyone else, I would have cut off their wrists without feeling satisfied, but the culprit was Ines. There must be another reason. And since she always washes her hands cleanly… … . He had diligently washed his hands again before coming here. Maybe there was a misunderstanding.

Since his intention to take Ines as his bride had not changed at all, Oscar showed a mature attitude by not making Ines' impiety public. It was embarrassing to hear such words from his future bride, but what he was really afraid of was not such a minor insult, but the fact that the engagement itself would fall through.

After being engaged to the royal family, Ines would not dare to call off the marriage no matter what she did, but before the engagement, it was a different story. The arrogant daughters of Grandes de Ortega sometimes kicked away their parents' words as if they were barking dogs.

Ines is the only daughter of the Ballestena family, so the royal family will not force her to marry him. And the Duke of Ballestena will not force her if his only young daughter refuses.

They had plenty of choices anyway. He even revealed that he preferred sons of nobles over royalty as his son-in-law. And he did so while looking straight into Oscar's eyes.

So, right now, this engagement was entirely up to Ines' little head.