part 41

"…" 

"…" 

I stared at Seung-rok for a moment. 

I couldn't say anything. 

How long did it last, I could not guess.

Maybe it was just a short silence, not even ten seconds. 

Seung-rok suddenly broke the silence, as if he were waving a white flag.

"Just kidding."

And at that moment, he gave a small laugh. 

It was his usual devilish smile. 

His cold eyes curved like a crescent moon. 

I bit my lip slightly. 

What a nuisance. 

I felt pathetic for being shaken even for a moment, and cold words came out naturally.

"That's not even funny."

Seung-rok smiled at me.

"Wearing clothes like that might draw some unwanted attention like now."

"Do you feel the same, Seung-rok?"

"Aren't I a man? I just hold it in."

As he said that, his mouth was always adorned with a brilliant smile. 

Do the fans know? 

That this bright-smiling K-pop idol is actually such a mischievous guy. 

While I was thinking that, the smile disappeared from Seung-rok's lips. 

He asked a question with a more serious expression.

"…Did the kid do it?"

"Yes."

"Don't give in to everything Hayeon asks for. I'm afraid it might become a habit."

Seung-rok's tone was calm. 

But I could feel a slight chill in it. 

I instinctively knew that what he said wasn't a joke.

"What do you mean?"

That made me even more curious.

"Please be kind to the child within your limits."

"Can't I even go to a clothing store with the child?"

I adjusted the collar of my shirt slightly and asked back.

I wasn't sure about this outfit, but his comment made me want to wear it even more.

Seung-rok glanced at me and continued speaking.

"Are you planning to live with Hayeon in my house forever?"

"…!"

Hearing that, I swallowed dryly. 

It sounded like a propose at first glance. 

But looking closely, it had a deeper meaning. 

What we have, we hold; 

what we lose, we feel.

Seung-rok wanted me to be kind to the child, but only to the extent that it could be maintained long-term.

He was cautioning me against acting like a family member if I wasn't.

His cold attitude made me so upset that I couldn't help but speak my mind.

"Will you?"

"From the child's perspective…"

I cut off Seung-rok, who was trying to say more. 

I didn't want to hear more of him.

It was my turn.

"I know. You're saying not to give away too much if I'm someone who will disappear from the child's life. That might be true. But why are you like that, Seung-rok?"

"What do you mean?"

"You will be with the child forever. Because you're the father. But why can't you do more for the child?"

"…"

Seung-rok said nothing. 

It might have been an unpleasant remark, but he couldn't say more because he felt guilty about something. 

I didn't mean to say such things. 

I just wanted to shut him up. 

But once I started talking, words flowed out like a burst dam. 

I was surprised at myself, realizing I wanted to say this at least once. 

Probably since the moment Seung-rok hinted that Hayeon was his daughter.

"Can you believe what the child just asked me? I told her she could ask for anything after she helped me choose clothes, and she said she wanted you to watch her play!"

Seung-rok sighed softly. 

It was almost a groan. 

Feeling I hit the mark, I continued.

"Is that something a six-year-old should say? Of course, a dad should come to see his child's performance. That little child worked so hard to prepare."

Seung-rok cleared his throat and spoke again in a low voice.

"I have a schedule. What can I do? I earn money so the child can eat and live. From her clothes to living expenses, food, and school fees, I cover everything. That's the price."

I expected that response. 

But I didn't say it because I didn't know what he just said.

"The child never asked for that. Hayeon is not at an age to worry about such things! She just wants you to be there."

Seung-rok fell silent. 

He couldn't admit it with words, but he couldn't deny it either. 

After a moment of silence, he spoke lightly.

"Then should I just quit?"

It was the same word, but it felt like a whole different message.

At first, it felt like a light challenge. 

This time, it was a self-deprecating remark. 

And unlike before, there was a bit of sincerity in his words.

Only after hearing that did I realize. 

He sometimes wanted to give up too. 

I hadn't noticed because Seung-rok was always so diligent. 

I just thought it was his calling. 

But maybe it wasn't. 

Maybe it was just a job to earn a living for him. 

Thinking that way, I suddenly felt sorry for him. 

I felt bad for pushing him so hard.

I tried to change the mood with a new question.

"Shouldn't we be worrying about something else for now? Where should we eat?" 

Seung-rok looked at me suspiciously for a moment.

Then he smiled slightly. 

That smile made my heart skip a beat, like a fool. 

It was more refreshing than any sparkling water. 

But the smile didn't last long. 

"What do you want to eat?" 

"Um… anything." 

As soon as I answered, Seung-rok frowned. 

"At least tell me what you don't like." 

He grumbled and started wandering around aimlessly. 

He looked around the shops by the beach and asked.

"How about grilled clams?" 

"Let's not eat seafood in summer! That's for winter!" 

"Then should we go to a barbecue place?" 

Seung-rok pointed to a nearby Samgyeopsal restaurant. 

"Uh… wouldn't it be a bit noisy?" 

After all, I met Seung-rok to talk today, and I didn't feel like eating at a barbecue place. 

I wanted somewhere quieter. 

Seung-rok gave me a slightly cold look. 

It felt like he was saying, 'Then you suggest something first.' 

I felt sorry. 

But what could I do?

That was really I how felt, sincerely. 

I decided to ask him a question instead. 

"What did you eat today?" 

"Um… tofu. And a salad?" 

"Ugh." 

Just hearing it made me groan. 

I had a rough idea, but really, an idol's diet was miserable. 

A life of eating only tofu, salad, and steamed chicken breast forever. 

I could understand why Seung-rok wanted to quit being an idol, even though it guaranteed wealth and fame. 

"Does that fill you up?" 

Seung-rok glanced at me and answered, 

"No." 

"Then what do you do?" 

Seung-rok laughed as if I had asked a stupid question. 

"Just endure it. Drink sparkling water."

Every time Seung-rok laughed, his eyes narrowed slightly. 

Why did he look so dazzlingly bright, mocking me like a wicked little devil? 

I felt like saying something back. 

I opened my mouth wide to say something, but then I felt a cold chill on the top of my head. 

I looked up at the sky as if in a trance. 

"Rain?" 

Suddenly, the sky was full of clouds, and I felt a chill. 

"We should go inside somewhere!" 

I hurriedly shouted to Seung-rok. 

If we stayed like this, we would both get soaked. 

But Seung-rok looked around as if it was no big deal. 

"…There's a perfect place."

He said, taking off his suit jacket and giving it to me.

"What?" 

I felt my face heat up. 

I was embarrassed. 

The jacket was still warm from Seung-rok's body heat.

Thanks to that, the chill I felt earlier subsided a bit. 

"There's a good place to go right now." 

He tapped the jacket he had put on me and started walking somewhere.

***

"I'll use this place for today. Tell everyone not to come. Okay." 

While Seung-rok made a call, I stared blankly at the house in front of me. 

It wasn't as big as Seung-rok's house where I currently lived, but it was very neat. 

It seemed like a better place to live than Seung-rok's house. 

Seung-rok finished his call and walked up to the gate, entering the password. 

It didn't seem like his first time here. 

"There are cooking utensils and food ingredients here. I'll make dinner. How about lamb stew?" 

"Ah, yes." 

I nodded without thinking. 

But my eyes were busy looking around the studio. 

It was decorated in a clean and simple Mediterranean style. 

While I was looking around, the gate opened, and I followed Seung-rok into the yard, observing the scenery. 

It felt more like a home than a recording studio. 

"Does someone live here?" 

"No, but I often work all night here. It's ready for living." 

"Do you work all night?" 

I couldn't imagine working while saving sleep. 

For athletes, resting was also part of the job. 

I never had to save sleep for anything. 

I wished I could drink, but my sleep was too important. 

Still, it seemed like idols had a tougher time than athletes.

Seung-rok answered as if it was nothing. 

"Sometimes the work continues for over a week. I only record, so I can't go beyond a certain level. But for producers it's even more." 

Saying that, Seung-rok opened the main door. 

Inside, it looked just like a regular house. 

There were rooms, a kitchen, and even a bathroom. 

It was so nice that I got confused about where to go. 

As I hesitated and looked around the master bedroom, Seung-rok spoke to me. 

"If you go towards the recording studio, there's a guest bedroom. There's a separate bathroom there, so you can shower. Change into pajamas because it's cold." 

"Ah… yes. Yes." 

I nodded without thinking. 

He was right. 

I got soaked by the rain without even having time to use an umbrella.

My whole body was cold. 

My clothes were quite wet too. 

I was already wearing light clothes, so it would be nice to dry them properly. 

Taking a shower would be even better.

Seung-rok had perfectly met my needs. 

I took off my clothes and soaked in warm water. 

I felt warmth to my bones. 

It was comfortable. 

I felt like I could fall asleep in that guest bedroom. 

Guest… bedroom? 

Suddenly, I came to my senses. 

I hadn't thought about it while going with the flow. 

But now that I thought about it, this man had brought me to a house with a bedroom. 

It was completely different from Seung-rok's studio and cinema I had been to before. 

That place was public, but this place was like… going to a hotel together! 

"Oh… my!" 

I covered my mouth with my hand in embarrassment. 

My heart was pounding like crazy. 

But somehow, I didn't feel bad.