Chapter 69: Roka's bad day.

Moonlight farming district

Training grounds

David Karkovsky

I start to feel fear in my heart as Aniki approaches, but before I give in to the impulse to step back, Certain words aniki spoke to me after the Magna Carta.

He said 'If you want to become strong, learn to use everything around you, including your emotions. Fear for example, can be particularly usefull once you master it's benefits. Take control of fear, letting it heighten your senses, not your actions, or your reactions.'

As I recall these words Aniki is merely 10 meters away from the line.

I feel my senses heighten as I hear the others behind me take a step back, while I hold my ground.

He's bearing down on me like a runaway dune worm.

I steel my resolve as I pay close attention to Aniki's form as he runs.

When Aniki takes the first step over the line everything slows down. I notice a deep crimson aura surrounding Aniki's body.

The gears in my head starts turning, when Aniki takes the next step planting both feet starting to brake his body while crouching and digging his heels into the ground.

The gears click into place as I realize the secret to the trial. It was so obvious, why didn't I see it before?

Aniki grinds to a halt a bit less than 1 meter from me, since I was standing on the second line.

He stands up as time starts to speed up again to normal.

A few moment's later Felmina-sama crosses the first line.

As I watch I notice the same red aura envelop her body. She barely screeches to a halt before crossing the limit.

She stands up at the last moment in an effort to stop herself from falling over, she bends forward wildly swingining her arms to try and regain her balance. But then she falls backward. Aniki noiselessly disappears from the corner of my eye, and catches her mere centimeters from the ground.

She turns looking up at him saying

"Showoff."

A seductive playful smile on her face.

He helps her up then puts his hand behind his head in apology.

She turns, and puts her arms around his neck as she hangs lovingly off his figure.

He touches her back and she lets go.

He turns to the stunned crowd

"Here's a little bonus for anyone brave enough to attempt my evaluation in the next five minutes."

He focuses his gaze on me in particular for a moment, then turns back to face the crowd.

"I will make you a team leader, and I will also unlock your current suit's full potential. lf you can succeed. However the punishment stays the same, if you should fail."

He turns around and walks to the first line, then turns back to face us, gazing over the crowd indifferently.

"Any takers?"

He scans the crowd from left to right, then his gaze stops in my direction.

Did someone behind me volunteer?

He opens his mouth.

"David... Good!"

A bit shocked I turn my head, why is my hand up?

WTF.

What did I just do?

I feel fear take a hold of my heart again as I realize my predicament, heightening my senses once again.

Then a calm rushes over me, as I recall another thing Aniki taught me, just before I started Hell week. He said. 'There once was a man who asked his father, the king. "Father, can a man be brave, if he is afraid? The king looked at his son, and responded "My son, that is the only time a man, can be brave."'

Those words got me through Hell week.

I step forward despite my fear.

I do a trial run of what I just learned on the far side. I failed, however this time I didn't stop 2 meters past the line like before. This time, just half my foot crossed it. I turn around.

I can do this.

I take my mark and take off heading toward my final evaluation.

The Mansion

Laboratory

Roka

I hear footsteps approaching.

Today isn't my day.

I woke up with a massive headache this morning, when I tried looking for some painkillers, I couldn't find any.

I endured the pain, and went down to the lab to wrestle with my newest problem, but I can't think straight, my head is pounding.

I am slumped on the couch in the break room.

I see Ryu and Felmina pass the window and enter the break room.

"So David really did it Ryu, just like you said."

"Yeah, he was the only one to even take up the challenge. I don't need cowards as team leaders."

I shift my position on the couch.

Felmina turns

"Ah! Roka here you are, we've been looking for you."

Ryu hands Felmina one of the 2 cups of coffee he just poured.

Ryu takes a sip, then asks.

"Any progress in solving the heating problem?"

I furrow my brows. I really don't want to have this conversation right now.

"Roka... answer me."

Suddenly, a rage fills me

"Fuck off! Will you."

I jump up and start to storm off.

Ryu grabs my arm.

"Roka wait, what's wrong?"

"Nothing!"

I look at Felmina, I see the concern in her face.

I can't. No. I don't want to look at my husband's face.

"You wouldn't understand."

I rip my arm from his hand.

"Now leave me the fuck alone."

I storm off.

I need to get out of here.

...

...

As soon as the adrenaline of the moment leaves my body, the headache returns, turning into a full blown migraine.

I feel a blunt, searing pain everytime my heart beats.

I would do anything to make the pain stop. I frantically search my room for some painkillers. When I move the dresser, I spot one.

I instantly gulp it down.

... As I'm laying on my bed I start to think, before I drift off.

I believe I feel like this, due to, in part a lack of sleep, rooted in a deep frustration.

When I think back, I've always been helped by Ryu. He figured out a way to speed up the construction in Vincent, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. I think that's where this all started. I love him, but I think that, as I fell in love with him, I ignored this resentment growing inside of me.

When I discovered the amplifying effect of the mana cores, Ryu stole my thunder again with little to no effort. When he named them Roka cores, I felt happy at first, but as time passed, I grew to hate that name. I felt like that name was mocking my intelligence. After all Ryu was able to effortlessly utilize them fully during the war. I feel like I both love, and hate my husband at the same time. I love the sex, but that's only physical. Emotionally, I feel like I could be thrown away by him at any moment. This latest problem feels like my last shot at regaining a chance to redeem myself in his eyes. I need to solve this on my own.

When I compare myself to Milly, I feel inferior, since she can read people's thoughts. And Felmina is extremely useful. She can fight almost on par with Ryu. But when it comes to me, if I receive his 'help', one more time, I don't think I can take it. Milly and Felmina are both useful. But what about me?

I can't even solve a simple heating problem by myself. I can't have him help me, not even accidentally.

...

I fall into a deep sleep as the pill takes effect.

...

...

...

I wake up as I hear someone enter.

I try to turn

...

Shit, I forgot about this medicine's negative side effects. If you wake up before the medicine is out of your system, your entire body becomes paralyzed, while your brain is completely conscious.

I hear the footsteps coming closer, I feel so vulnerable.

Please Management not Ryu not Ryu not Ryu!, ANYONE BUT MY HUSBAND. PLEASE. I BEG OF YOU!.

I pray.

I feel a soft touch on my back.

"It's me, Milly"

I relax.

Milly...

'PLEASE HELP ME!!"

I scream in my head. It's hopeless, I'm laying face down, she can't read me.

I feel lost and hopeless.

I feel her touch on my arm.

Finally!

"Oh my! You poor thing."

She's reading me, I can sense it.

'HELP ME MILLY'

I desperately scream once more.

"Understood."

She lets go, did I get through to her?.

She leans in close to my ear, and whispers

"Don't worry, I've got you. Let me take care of this, then I'll come help you."

A calm washes over me as I hear her reassuring voice.

I feel her get up from the bed, then I hear the door opening.

"How is--"

It's Ryu's voice

"She's fine, but you need to leave now, dearest husband. Felmina, you can stay."

"But what's wrong, can't I help somehow?"

"No you can't, you're gonna need to trust me with this. There's nothing you can do. Please just go.

Trust me. Felmina, come inside."

I hear the door close.

"Come with me."

I hear them approaching. Someone takes a seat on the bed again.

Must be Milly again.

She leans over.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone your secret. You can relax."

She pulls away.

"Felmina, use sleep on Roka."

"But why?"

"Trust me, and just do it, All I can say, is that it's all we can do for her right now. Once she wakes up, I'll let her decide if she wants to share what's been bothering her."

"Fine"

I feel a hand going inbetween the pillow and my forehead.

"Sleep"

Thank you Milly.

...