FOR DEAR LIFE

Astrid

I must have cried for hours without stopping but it still felt like it was a minute ago when Anel told me about the cruel plan Magnus had in store for me. How could he want to break off the bond when he knew very well that it would have disastrous impacts on me and could even possibly end my life!

Even if he didn't feel anything for me, was killing me the best way to show me how unwanted and miserable I was? It hurt so much—worse than how my mother's harsh treatments had been.

Most times, Magnus behaved like he cared, he gave me attention and some bits of love. He made me feel weak in the knees, his touch agitating the butterflies in my stomach. I felt the connection between us but why didn't he? Why couldn't he?

Anel was there the whole time to console me, but it was hard to pull myself together. "You should stop crying, Astrid. I know it hurts but you can't kill yourself over it."

I scoffed. "Of course, I can't! Magnus will do it for me. It's just a matter of time before he severs the bond and then what will become of me?"

"I don't know," Anel said, "but I don't want you to cry either. We should be planning."

I wiped my eyes and sniffled. My lips were trembling as I attempted to speak. "You know, Anel, I keep wondering why he did all this. I was at home, suffering and coming to terms with my harsh life. Back home, I knew I was hated and no one tried to hide it.

"Why then would Magnus come and take me away from that suffering if he was going to subject me to another kind of suffering?"

Anel exhaled. "In as much as you're angry at him now for what he's about to do, I have to confess that Alpha Magnus is not a bad person. He's the kindest and most thoughtful person I know. But it has long been rumored that he had issues with mate bond."

I wiped my eyes. "It doesn't matter. He doesn't want me and has chosen to severe the bond regardless of whether I die or not."

I was wondering what they'd do with my body when I died because of the breaking of the bond. Would Magnus bury me or would they throw me out on the streets? Would he cry?

Of course, not! Why would he cry over me when he obviously wanted nothing to do with me? Maybe what he felt for me was just pity but I'd taken it too far and create the illusion that he felt something for me.

I thought back to the night he'd come home a little drunk after catching me at a bar. He'd told me I belonged here and had kissed me. That was the first day my fear turned to passion. It was a memorable moment for me and though we hadn't had sex, it had been passionate.

Anel patted my back and then asked, "Do you know if he has taken your blood?"

I frowned. "No, I don't know. Why do you ask?"

"Magnus can't perform the ritual of bond-breaking unless he has your blood. Without your blood nothing can be done to severe the bond."

I thought for a while but I still couldn't be sure. If Magnus wanted so badly to take my blood, he could easily do it when I was asleep and I wouldn't know about it. I didn't think it was logical that he'd come up to me and ask for a few droplets of blood. I sighed. "I don't know if he secretly took my blood, but I doubt he has."

"Good," Anel said, heaving a sigh of relief. "At least that makes things a little easier for us now. You have to leave, Astrid. You need to run away from this place and go somewhere he won't find you. It will be hard but as long as he doesn't have your blood, you'll be safe."

I nodded because the idea made sense though there was one problem that I couldn't help but notice. "It's also said that mates cannot be too far from each other because also causes emotional pain and trauma. You're asking me to run away and end up hurting both of us."

"At least he'll feel what you feel!" Anel said, anxious. "You can't just wait till he gets your blood and does the ritual. You need to leave first."

I nodded then I stood up and walked to the window and looked outside. Guards were almost everywhere! Most were standing like stone statues, others were moving about while others were patrolling. "How do we get past them?" I asked her, pointing out the window to the guards.

"That's a problem, but I'm sure we'll find a way to distract them and get you as far as the stable so you can get a horse and go." Anel laid out the plan step by step and I nodded as she spoke. I was feeling anxious because I felt that each moment that we wasted was getting me closer and closer to death. I just felt like Magnus would come back any moment and walk in on us talking about escaping the pack.

"Wouldn't it be easier to just sneak out without a horse or maybe I wolf out and flee?" I asked.

Anel shook her head. "No, it won't work. None of those will! The key is to remain covert. If you sneak around, the guards will catch you sooner than later. If you wolf out, you are basically blowing a whistle on yourself because they'll sot you."

"What do you suggest we do?" I asked.

"I think you should get a disguise, something that doesn't make you stand out too much. I'll give you some regular clothes here. Then, we set up a distraction to take the guards' attention off their duty for a while so you can sneak away. Next, we'll go to the stable and get a horse. If we can go that far, then you'll be safe in another place until Magnus either changes his mind or comes to find you."

"You think he'll look for me?" my heart skipped when I asked that. It didn't matter to me whether he came to look for me with the purpose of finally breaking off the bond. What mattered was that at that point, I'd be important enough to be looked for by him. Perhaps I could run, leading him around the world in a bittersweet affair. I smiled sadly to myself before Anel's voice snapped me out of my day dream.

"What do you think about the plan?" she asked.

I gave her the thumbs up. "It's perfect!" I knew nothing about hatching an escape plan. If I had, I would've escaped from home years ago before the abuse got too much. Or maybe I stayed because even I felt the guilt. If I hadn't been sinking in the water, my brother wouldn't have drowned trying to rescuing me.

Anel smiled and went on to arrange the things we'd need. Water, food and clothes. She gave me her plain clothes and I put them on and wore a straw hat. We were ready to run away.