It's the environment- Chapter 26

The human body works in different ways ! Tears they say is a form of cleansing for the eyes , and it's also a form of release for the heart ... But how much can a heart release ? ... How much can my heart release ? And how much can I take ? Sometimes I swear I hear the wind howl when I cry ... Pathetic .

I truly don't wanna cry anymore but it's no longer for the same reasons I cry ! I know Damon is sorry and I know that it shouldn't really be that big of a deal but it was - that's not why I cry now ! I weep for my past .. wallow in the present and mourn for the future .. a future I have no control over ! I mourn for the unknown.

" Hi Diana " Inéz and I haven't spoken for a while now .. so I'm surprised she followed me here .

" You okay ?" She whispers squating beside me

" I'm - okay "

" No you aren't"

" Yh , I've cried so much these past few days .. I don't - even know what- to do "

" You always know what to do , whether it's for you or others .. and you are a very strong and brave girl ..if anyone can figure out how to take a breath .. it's you "

" Those might be the smartest words you have ever said to me inéz .. you know that ?"

" Maybe .." she giggles and I envy her .. envy how bright she shines !

" Let's go D"

" D?" I ask .. Ale calls me that

" Sorry .. I should have asked if I can call you that "

" It's okay .. good to see Ale's replicating himself in you " she gasps which causes me to smile

" Let's go ! " She huffs and jumps up. !

" Okay " .. We walk in silence , very comfortable silence .

" I'm going to The boys dorm .. Ale's waiting for me "

" Bye " I watch her go before entering our dorm , Stacy's probably also at the boys dorm .. I swear sometimes I think they have a foursome . I lay down and close my eyes .. not sleeping but meditating ! Taking slow and steady breaths .. I stay like that for a while .. I don't know how long , but when I fling my eyes open ... I know what I have to do .. and I go to tell the rest .. I call Rami and he says they are at the terrace .. so I hurry there .. it's clear as day .. I guess all I needed was a clear mind and meditation.. I run to the table

" Hey !! Slow down what's chasing you ?" Ale asks me

" Where's he ? "

" Who ?" He asks playing dumb

" Damon ? I don't know ! " He shrugs ...

"I swear to God - if you don't tell me I will turn you inside out "

"Heyyy !" He starts but then ! .. the shadows at the corners .. and then .. I feel it ... I turn my back to find him staring at me .. I didn't see him there .. or maybe he wasn't..

I walk towards him and watch the skeptical look on his face .. I stop in front of him

" Hi "

" Hello Diana " I told him to call me that I guess

" I love you " I watch the shock .. turn to relieve.. " I love you Damon ... And yes you lied to me ... And it shouldn't really be a big deal .. and I'm sorry for making it one .. you had your reasons and I respect that ... I guess I wasn't really upset with you .. I was upset about what we discovered and I put it all on you "

" Okay "

" Yh .. I'll give you .. time I just wanted to let you know " I turn my back but I'm drragged back

" I'm sorry too .. I should have never lied to you, and this past days without you has been torture .. I don't need time Kocheshka.. I need you , and God you don't know how I wanted to call you that. " he whispers in my ear " and I love you more "

" I don't think that's even possible" I laugh or cry whichever it sounds like

" It is " he turns me and claims my mouth ... I melt into him as I wrap my arm around his neck , I feel him ... I want him and he explores my mouth freely and for a moment.. I forget ...

" Mm wait .." I move backwards a bit and give him a smile .

" You look like you might eat me " he looks like he's about to pounce so before we Apparate to God knows where he has in mind .. because I know.. I need to break a news .

" Common " I drag him behind me to the table where the rest are seated ..

" That was quite a show ... " Ale whistles

" Shut it ! " I laugh . .

"What's that ?" I watch as Ale and Dante hand over money to Rami ..

" Well princess they made a bet with me that you would stay mad at Damon for two more weeks or more .. while I told them it won't last up to a day anymore .. so they made a bet on it " he shrugs like he didn't just say that

" Wee.... made a bet on it " Dante and Ale chorus

" I can't believe this " I scoff .. and let myself be dragged down by Damon onto his thighs

" So you are talking to Damon but not Stacy ?" Rami asks .

" No idea what you talking about " I turn my face away

" Listen you both were angry and frustrated, you said things but that doesn't mean you shouldn't talk to each other"

" I'll talk to whoever I want .. whenever"

" Then talk to her " He insists

" I'm sorry I thought you realized I meant I'd talk to PEOPLE "

" You are just unreasonably mean to me ! " Stacy tells me

" I am ?" I ask .

" Yes !"

" Well congrats "

" Because I painted the truth out ? Really ?? " ..

" No ! "

" Then why ?"

" Next time try poking your nose where it's actually needed ... Like in a cemetery preferably six feet under.. instead of in my relationship... I let you and Rami sort your things out .. the next time I have an argument or a fight .. I don't even wanna know with who just keep your nose out of it ... If you still want to keep breathing of course"

" Wow.. okay then " she slumps in her chair .

" What I wanted to announce is that .....drum roll please "

" Oh just spit it out D !" Ugh Ale's always impatient

" I'm moving out !!! " I tell In happiness but they don't share my energy .. .

" You are what ?!!" Rami exclaims .. okay maybe I didn't really gauge their expressions and reactions well

" Moving out !" .

" You are joking right ?" Ale asks

" No "

" Did you know about this ?" Rami asks Damon

" No .. I'm also just hearing this " he doesn't seem shocked

" You are not going !" Ale says as he stands up .

" I wasn't asking "

" Excuse me ?"

" You are excused Alejandro! But I'm moving out of the dorm and getting an apartment"

" Why ? " Rami asks me

" Because I finally figured out why this past few days have been so sad for me .. apart from the argument of course " I say glancing at Damon who's face is blank of any emotion .. I can't tell if he's also not in support.

"And what's that ? " Ale asks

" The environment.. Ale it's the environment"

" I'm leaving tomorrow.... There's an apartment just along the school road ..it's not far and I love it ! "

" You have seen it ? " Rami asks

" No ! " Honestly I just saw the pics

" Fine then ... You made up your mind ?"

" Yes "

" Do I get a vote ?" Inéz asks

" No love " I smile at her

" Ugh fine " she grumbles

" That would be all " Damon announces and carries me up from his thighs like I'm some sort of light weight... I am not and we Apparate into his apartment ! It was rude for him to leave like that ... I doubt he will listen to me now though .

" I still wonder how you Apparate so far !" Honestly how ? It's amazing

" It takes practice you will get there "

" Okay " I watch him pull his shirt over his head

" Damon ?" .

" Yes Kocheshka?"

" I need to walk well tomorrow "

" We'll see " he smirks