Facing the Past

Rue expected a lot of things when he landed back in Calloway for the first time in months. At best he thought there would be a driver sent from his parents to pick him up. At worst it would be a crowd of angry people waiting to say more derogatory things about him.

Technically the last part was still true. An angry crowd had formed, but they was unable to get close to him to do serious damage thanks to the guards and security blocking them.

The flashing of lights and screams had him looking away from the crowd to the sight he expected to see the least when he deboarded the jet.

To him it was something he would deem impossible.  

He was barley off the jet when he spotted his father's car. A car he rarely drove considering they had a driver.

He was stun his father even wanted to see him the moment he landed. It had him feeling uneasy about the meeting now. His father never would have came to get him. 

He would have left him to the wolves of an angry crowd who demanded for him to be dead, or worse. Rue only remembered to move when Fen lightly touched his back in support.

He didn't have to look at Fen to know he felt just as uneasy about this meeting as he did. The unexpected was never good. It was fun at times, until it wasn't.

Whatever was going to happen today it wasn't in his favor. He mentally started preparing himself for the worst.

What was the worst? What was worser than having your own mouth stitched shut after being kidnapped, stuck in a small cage with your own feces?

Rue could feel his own heart beating in his throat; choking him. It's been two years since he last saw his father. Two years since his father had more words to say to him than he had his whole life. 

If a silent man like his father spoke more than usual it was either one of two things: you disappointed him or you made him proud.

Rue could never tell which one he did until it became exceptionally clear that it was the former when his father brought up his birth mother into his arguments.

The surprise meeting had him more on guard, raising his anxiety through the roof, taking ahold of him. His mind thinking of every terrible thing that could go wrong. Rue had to remind himself not to be so paranoid.

The crowd shouting was making it no better. Crowds scared him. Angry crowds was way worse.

He had no idea how the reporters found out he was arriving back in Calloway. He just found out himself last night.

It was nice thought to fool himself into thinking he come and go quietly without being notice, without having to experience being chase down by an angry crowd.

A manic smile pulled to his face, it only seemed to egg the crowd on as he got closer to his father's car.

His smile widen; it was almost painful. Rue has simple rules he follows: smile and wave. Nothing more. Nothing less. Give them nothing. 

He knew what they didn't. They didn't want him to go into the detail about how their child pleaded out to not die, or the last words they said.

"Hurry up. No telling who has a gun." Fen urged, wasting not time so shove him in the direction of the car, looking around their surroundings with caution.

Rue nodded, shorting the last distance from him to the car. As if on routine he got in the backseat first while Fen put their sparse luggage in the trunk.

The guard his parents so helpfully supplied helped Fen put their lugage up. Rue closed his eyes as he leaned towards the door, listening to crowds words.

"Monster!"

"I'm going to cut you open, boy. See how you like it." 

Rue smiled softly at that one. He's sure it would be rather painful without sedatives. He wouldn't want to try it out.

"Go kill yourself you damn monster."

"Why did you have to kill my sister!" Rue eyes shot open, lookIng for that small voice of a child among the crowd. He didn't understand why they had to bring a child in it. 

The adults can hate him all they like, but if they have younger kids that knew nothing of it they should keep it that way. The shouldn't do unnecessary things like involving their kids in their hate towards him.

They deserve to have a parent that's actually there and present with them instead of one that's focus on hating him.

"I ought to cut your tongue out and f-" The words instantly became a hum to him when his father spoke up.

"Did you have to take so long?" His father, Sebastian snapped, looking at him with scorn from the mirror.

Rue pouted, leaning forward into his father's space, visibly making the man more uncomfortable.

"I miss you too, father dearest." His words lacked any real warmth to it. It sounded just as insincere as he felt. Another lie to tell to another person. A lie he told a thousand times to a thousand people.

His father narrowed his eyes at him pointedly looking through the rear-view mirror, scrutinizing his every move. He was under a microscope, waiting to be judge by the masses.

They wanted to see if something was different. Whether he became more sane, or lost his mind to insanity.

"Watch yourself, Lucien." 

Rue watched his father a moment before responding. "Got it."

The opening of a car door had Rue glancing back to make sure it was Fen. It was. He looked put off about the crowd as much as he did.

Sebastian didn't wait for Fen to be properly seated and buckled in before he was driving off, speeding to get away from the reporters.

Rue leaned his head against the window, the coldness of it freezing his cheek, as he watched the scenery fly by.

Looking out the windows always made the world feel surreal. It made him feel like an outsider to everything. His emotions. His life. His own mind. 

None of it truly felt like his.

"Is Ollie and Delcan home?" Rue mutters, briefly glancing back at his father, a frown pulled to his face.

One of the few things he missed was his family. They kicked him out a few months after the incident leaving him to fend for himself. He remembers being scared shitless. Having to be on the streets where a bunch of people were itching to kill him was not something he wanted to go through at fifteen.

"You'll know when we arrive." Sebastian answers, remaining vague about the situation. Unintentionally making Rue more alert and on guard.

"Why am I back? What was so important you couldn't tell me over the phone? Didn't you make it clear to not show my face again?" The words never left his mouth, staying formed in his throat, fighting to be heard.

It was a nice thought but he could never speak those words out loud. 

It didn't take them long to arrive to his childhood home with his father's speeding and reckless driving. When they pulled up the drive way was full with security cars.

"You can stay in your old room upstairs. Your butler can take a room in the staff quarters." Sebastian said, still not looking at him as he went inside leaving Fen and Rue to get their own belongings.

Luckily for them they only had two duffle bags and two large suitcases making much easier for them to bring everything without help.

"Are you going to tell him we're sharing a room?"

"I am. Once I figure out why we're back to this hell hole."

A quick search around the place Rue found his father in the dining room along with the rest of his family.

His step-mother, Liana, grimace at his presence almost disappointed that he showed up.

Ollie was nowhere to be found. No surprise there.

Declan stared at him a smile on his face, as he stood up to greet him. "I'm glad you could make it, Lu."

"Glad to be here." Lies.

Rue took his seat directly in front of his mother, the only mother he ever loved. The only mother who loved him despite his flaws and failures. 

Now she hated him. How could she hate him when she suggested-

Liana is a hypocrite, but so is he. That's why they make made the perfect mother and son duo.

"Good evening, Mother."

"Lucien." It sounded like saying his name pained her. Maybe it did.

None of his family was conversationalist so the conversation was stilted. Declan cleared his throat, a look of curiosity on his face.

"I heard you're taking classes this fall."

"I plan to. I'm going to Russia to take my classes. However, I am still unsure whether I should go to Russia, or California. Both of the colleges I chose took a chance on me in-spite of my history." 

"California is pretty hot year round, so the best choice would be Russia considering your hatred for the heat." Declan inputs, carefully choosing his words.

"Mmh. What Fen likes best is going to lead to my final choice. To me anyplace is fine as long as I have him." Rue said, not looking at any of them in favor of writing on the napkin beside him.

"Your butler? I didn't realize you to were so close." Liana sounded disgusted at the prospect of him being close with his "help".

She'll be really shock when she realize how close they truly are.

"I don't blame you for not realizing it. You haven't been apart of my life for the past five years."

Rue finally looked at them, he saw no guilt on their face. They truly didn't regret anything they did. He doesn't know why he held out hope that they would.

Just when he was making up his mind to leave Fen walked in.

"Everything is upstairs, Sir." Fen bows, ignoring the extra people in the room.

"Thank you. You can rest now, Fen." Rue orders, a certain tiredness wearing him down.

No on said anything as the maids passed out dinner. Everything was quiet. Peaceful even. It would lull anyone into a false sense of security.

"What am I here for? Surely it's not to have dinner?" Rue questions, leg bouncing underneath the table at all the possibilities of why he is back.

The suspense was killing him. One thing he doesn't like is being left in the dark.

The sound of silverware clinking against plates was the only thing heard until his father finally answered him.

"Well we're hosting an event to remember the nine lives lost that day. You're needed to be there. You have to do a speech." It wasn't a request, but a demand.

A demand to do what they say no questions ask. If it was before he would agreed easily.

Things change. This was one of those things

"You want me to do what?" Rue gritted out through clench teeth suppressing his growing anger.

They called him back for this crap? He wasn't fucking apologetic. And he sure as hell wasn't their dog.

There was no way he was going to give up his life to meddle around with their needs. Did they need a reminder what happened five years ago.

His father looked at him with contempt his patience running thin with him. "You've heard me clearly."

"Oh no, you misunderstood me. I heard you alright. I just want you to repeat it before I stab you."

Rue hand clenched around the edge of the table, his body shaking in suppressed anger, ready to unleash on anyone.

"I said you're going to be at the memorial event for a speech. I expect you to express your sorrows and condolences for what you did."

"I'm not doing that. My sorrows? My condolences? Why should I do any of those things. I don't feel sorry for them." They're not the one's afraid to go out anywhere in fear of being hurt. They're not forcing themselves to stop flinching in fear every time someone raises their voice at them.

"Did you have any idea what you put us through? The vandalism. The threats. The death threats to your brothers. Do you any idea how much we suffered because of you?" Liana yelled, her hand smacking against the table in anger.

Rue looked down at the table playing with the edges of the table cloth. His head downcast could easily be mistaken as him feeling sorry for what he apparently did.

He was. He was sorry his brothers had to go through that. They didn't deserve that. He imagine finishing college must have been hell for them. 

The family must have been constantly hound by reporters looking for a scoop. Isolated by classmates.

"I'm s-sorry." Rue blinked the tears away from his eyes, preparing himself to look them in the face once more. 

"I'm sorry that I'm not sorry." Don't say that. Take it back. 

His father banged his fist against the table, the look in his eyes frightened Rue. He hated that look. His father always looked soulless when he looked at him like that.

"Lucien, you will do what you're told. Anything else you will be punished. I expect you to go up there and look fucking sorry for what you did. Do you understand?"

"Yes father." Rue murmurs, pushing his chair back. 

He casted one last look at his brother who's been silent since before. Declan face was blank giving nothing away.

Rue scoffed. He doesn't know why he expected anything different.

He quickly dismissed himself, forcing himself to walk calmly to his room, giving nothing away in fear of being caught weak.

Fen was in his room when he arrived, phone in hand. Rue kicked off his shoes locking the door behind him, his tears finally falling.

Fen only needed to take on look at him to open his arms wide an a silent invitation. Rue immediately welcomed it, crawling into Fen's lap to press his face into his neck.

His tears a running faucet, unable to stop once they started.

Fen rubbed his back in soothing circles, whispering sweet reassurances that would be able to make butterflies appear in anyone's stomach with his words.

"What happened?"

"What about me? What about what I went through?" Rue hiccuped out, his snotty nose getting on Fen's neck.

Yet, the older man wasn't bothered by the tears nor snot on him as if he was use to it.

"They didn't care what happened. I get what they went through, but what about me. I get the same thing, if not worse." Rue cries out, his voice sounding wrecked.

"I know. I know. Cry it out. I'm here. Always." Fen reassures, "You're not alone. I can promise you that."

"I know." Rue agrees, sitting up to look down at Fen properly, his cheeks red, and eyes puffy from crying.

"Good?"

"Perfect." Rue confirms, standing up for a shower as if he didn't spend the last few minutes crying out his grievances.

Rue exhaled the moment the bathroom door shut behind him. A manic smile coming to his face.

How pitiful.

They really shouldn't have called him back. He's never been one to follow orders well. They should know that best, after all mommy dearest found that out the hard way.

Oh well.

He's back. Now only time will tell whether it was a good thing, or a bad thing.