William

I lay unmoving on his shoulder, with a complex expression on my face, too deep in thought, staring blankly at the steps after us, as William treads upwards. His face, also out of touch with reality, as he reflects on the event that had just played out before him, his brows randomly wincing aggressively at times, but staying silent, his automated steps being the only noise echoing in the dull, empty hallway.

"Say, why do you want money that badly? You don't seem like the greedy type."

I say without the movement of any part of my body, limped around his shoulder like a noodle.

His automation up the stairs abruptly ends, his bent leg hovering above the next step of the stairs.

"Were you conscious when those nurses were committing those horrible acts onto you?"

He says in a sad, almost angry tone, his voice both clear and trembling at the same time, setting his foot down on the step in front of him.

Shit! I spoke without thinking! Now he thinks I'm some pervert who enjoys being abused!

After a few seconds pass, as if I let his words marinate, so that I can fully process it, I reply in a trembling, almost scared voice.

"Y-yeah, I was awake…"

My muscles suddenly contract, producing a large, abrupt shaking on his shoulder.

Damn it! Hold still, body! Don't start freaking out! Maybe he hasn't figured it out yet!

"Oh Arthur, I'm so sorry that you had to go through such horrible atrocities, I will make sure that all three of them get the punishment they deserve! You must've been so scared. This just had to happen when you just started recovering!"

He stomps on the stair loudly with his next step, pausing for a second before continuing his ascent. 

"I didn't know where you were relocated, by the time I had finished planning for your new room, you were already gone, and no one I asked knew where you were. I know this still isn't a fair excuse, I should've searched harder for you, so you can put all the blame on me. I can be your therapist, or even find you one so please, don't be so scared!"

William's speech abruptly comes to an end, the silence that comes after it, unnatural, and almost deafening. 

So this is the real William, a doctor with an unbreakable sense of justice, and empathy like no other. His will, even stronger will when children are involved. He must have had a rough upbringing. If I had to guess, he probably experienced what those nurses were about to do to me. It's unusual, I feel a strong burning rage inside me, even though I have yet to awaken my Solar Mana. Regardless, if those who did that to him are still alive, I want to kill them with my own hands.

As William continues to carry me up the stairs, through the silence, a new substance absorbed by the stone stairs, its dark color trailing behind the newly passed stairs.

William– he's a kind person…

"Thank you."

My voice comes out with a long sigh, my nose beginning to fill with mucus as a sudden wave of emotion overwhelms me. 

William's shoulder tightens, a spasm occurring from out of nowhere, just I finish speaking. His eyes narrow, with much rage to be seen in it, but then suddenly, his down-pointing frown suddenly softens as he relaxes his eyebrows, fastening his grip, before he starts up the stairs again, two steps at a time.

I suddenly remember my memory of being held like a baby in Martha's soothing, warm arms, the feel of her calm, steady heartbeat as I pressed up against her chest.

I had forgotten since I started training, but it's not so bad to be treated like a kid.

I lay happily on William's shoulder, now enjoying the faster bumpy ride, hiding my wide smile, I hadn't shown since I was a kid, under his freshly cleaned lab coat.

It smells so nice… I wonder if he can tuck me in like dad…

***

Feeling the harsh red light of the sun shining on my face, my eyes wince away, almost like a spasm, pulling my blanket over my head to block it.

Ugh– I'll never get used to that sun.

A second later, I pull the sheets off my head and sit upright, staring out the window, staring directly at the sun.

"Red."

I blurt out randomly, in a dry and sickly voice, the emotion void from it, with no context to make sense of it. Half asleep, my brain is yet to be turned on.

"Yes, it is red indeed."

A voice from my left side spoke.

"I like it much better, orange. The red seems a bit too violent for me to be looking at, the first thing in the morning."

The voice speaks again, almost responding automatically.

"Right? It's much too violent for me as well, it reminds me too of blood, doesn't it?"

The voice speaks steadily, my brain beginning to turn on, sending me signals of something yet to be processed.

"Yeah…"

The horrifying memories and nightmares I pushed behind me, ache throughout my head in a blurry image, but the pain manageable enough for me to keep it hidden.

"Hey who are you again?"

I turn around with my finger at them as I turn my body to face them.

"Greetings, Arthur."

My brain, still half asleep, fails to process the signals my ears and eyes give it, unable to recognize the person, covered in blood in front of me.

Hmm… who is this? Why can't I remember who they are? Lets see, rectangular glasses, well kept black hair–

Clothes covered in blood–

My brain finally connects the dots, forcefully switching on before I even realize it.

Wait, blood covered clothes?

The bed frame creaks as I quickly scramble away from the left side of the bed.

"He-hello Dame Martha– wha-what are you doing here? Why- why are your clothes all bloody?"

She keeps a stern look of bitterness on her face, before making a gesture pointed at a spot on my bed.

"May I?"

She asks in a soft tone, unlike the angry look on her face.

"O-oh, of course!"

I look down at the bed, and in a great hurry, hastily pull my blankets away, while increasing the distance between me and her.

I close my eyes after I manually shut off my body's overreaction, finally calming.

Huh, I've been spending a lot of time on beds these days haven't I? Well, it's better than sleeping on opened book pages so maybe I shouldn't complain before this comfort gets taken from me.

As I reopen my eyes, I see Martha sitting respectfully, her back straightened and feet planted lightly on the floor.

What? There was no sound! I didn't even feel the bed shake when she sat down! These damn accursed unheightened senses! 

"I made a terrible mistake leaving those nurses to watch you. I must have let my personal emotions take over and blinded myself. They were good girls, or at least, I thought they were. I don't expect you to forgive me for what I've done, but I have punished all three of them with my own hands. They will never bother you ever again."

What does she mean? They'll never come close to me again? Did she kill them?!?! It would be an easy case if she only killed the two because they were caught in the crime, but if she killed the third one who hasn't been seen actually committing a crime worthy of an immediate execution, she'll be imprisoned! Like dad! And with my current state, I am in no condition to save her. Because she isn't a noble, she won't be able to be granted appeals like him either! The ruling will be whatever the court decides from one hearing!

This is bad! I don't want her to get punished and die, because she took revenge on my behalf, but I also can't just ignore the law! 

While I debate thoroughly on what to do, inside my chaotic, conflicting mind, pushing morals against law, Martha sits still on the bed before she suddenly reaches into a pocket.

"Here are the items that William told me that you wanted to see."

What?

I stop the raging argument in my mind, and look out of my eyes, in her hand, holding the dull rock I named Sagey, and the beautifully crafted, Gold lined, and gem encrusted Eye of the Storm.

Oh thank god they didn't throw Sagey away. I did not want to have to tell them to find a boring looking rock the size of a ball, and pinpoint one of the thousands scattered across the capital. 

Martha's eyes look at my eyes, yet to notice my lack of expression with them as I focus intensely on the artifacts. Her eyes narrow, showing a hint of sorrow that she failed to mask, but the emotion too little to be visible to the untrained eye.

Martha abruptly rises after setting the artifacts down, the bed unmoving, with no sound to be made as she gets up.

"Well, I will see myself out now. You can speak to either me or William if you are feeling unwell, and I have assigned only my most trusted, senior nurses to you. This situation will never happen to you again in the Mint Estate."

As Martha slowly makes her way to the door, I reflect on myself, satisfied with the current state of things.

This works great! Now I just need those herbs that I told William to get, and then I will be all set for the next 20 days, until I originally started my story in my previous life. So that means I'll have 20 extra days to prepare for the day I go to the church. I wonder, will the church executives be different? I am certain that that sun in the sky is not Pyro, or at least the Pyro I know, so maybe they worship a different god? 

I imagine myself lighting a magic lamp inside my head, and that imaginary outburst inside, is enough for me. My physical body remains still, with a gleeful smile on my face.

OOH DOES THAT MEAN THAT THERE ARE OTHER GODS ALIVE IN THIS WORLD?! THAT'S AMAZING!! Wait, would that also mean that Magnus Arcanus and his cult also doesn't exist in this world? 

I fall back onto my pillows in delight, the smile brimming on my face.

Ahhh, regressing back in time to an alternate world is so interesting! And no one will spoil it for me, I won't allow them. If Arcanus truly doesn't exist in this world, I will be able to discover it myself, instead of only being able to read about it in books! An explorer, an adventurer!

An image of Amy, looking up at me, smiling happily, with a lollipop in her mouth flashes in my head, like any other image, it immediately fades, just a afterimage that I try to keep inside my head, built from the instantaneously disappearing image, it's form, shaping into an unrecognizable figure, slipping from my mind the longer I try to grasp at it.

Focusing just on her bright smile in the beginning, I feel my own keep pushing outward, trying to spread wider, past the limits of my face, from the overflowing happiness I felt, for that moment. But as the image fades, so does my smile, up until it returns to neutrality, finally opening my eyes, seeing the bland ceiling, high up in the room, unlike the fancy room around it.

The ceiling could use some art.

I turn my head to the left, looking at Martha, with my brain manually shut off, watching her just as she goes to reach for the door handle, but her hand suddenly stops. 

A second later– "BANG BANG BANG!!!"

My head suddenly jerks back from the sudden, loud banging on the door. But it quickly takes its place back where I once held it, now staring cautiously at the door, and Martha's reactionless reaction.

"Martha! I know you're in there! Hurry up and come out, I've been waiting out here for you for two hours already! I want to go out and see the city, but these pesky knights won't let me go alone!"

There is a silence in the room after the loud screams, but Martha stays still, as if nothing had happened, out of the ordinary.

Who could possibly yell at someone like Martha in her own clinic? I don't– wait, no, there could only be one person! 

I repeat the voice I recorded in my head, listening carefully to it, then repeating it once more.

That's Lillian's voice! I almost didn't recognize it! Well, I guess I've never heard her angry before, just like a clumsy child would, a terrified child, another terrified child, terrified– okay wow, looking through these memories, most of my interactions with her have been with her being scared of me.

I look over to another bookshelf, one where I've kept all the memories and feelings that've made my mind go numb, a massive bookshelf, with but a few books in it.

Yeah well, except for that one…

The knock comes again, this time, louder than any coming before it.

"BANGG-kr"

Kr?

"FUCK!!"

I automatically close my eyes, keeping to myself as I try to rationalize, and deny the words I've just heard come from the voice outside the door.

Did she just say fuck? Nonono, I must've heard it incorrectly. Even if the personality that she shows everyone else in private, there's no way she would scream out a curse word in public, I mean, she is a noble after all! 

"SHIIT!!!!"

My eyes split open, hearing such accursed words be screamed. I immediately look up, and stare at Martha so intensely, my eyeballs could have fallen out at that point. 

Why is she acting like nothing is happening?! There's no way this is a common occurrence right? Come on, please tell me that isn't the case! I know you can see me looking at you!! 

"AAGH!! MY HAND!!"

Lillian screams out in pain, exaggerating the cry of pain by tenfold, yet Martha continues looking at the door, not blinking even once since she had arrived at the door.

"I JUST SAID MY HAND WAS HURT! AREN'T YOU GOING TO COME AND LOOK?!?! Agh~ FINE THEN, IF YOU AREN'T GOING TO COME OUT, THEN I'LL JUST BREAK IN!"

I sit on the bed, my eyes no longer hold any anger within them as I stare blankly at Martha. I had stopped listening after hearing Lillian's annoyed groan, having mistaken it for something else. Inside my mind, my final memory of Lillian kept in that empty bookshelf is reminded to me. 

"Euwgh"

My body suddenly shivers all over, my muscles contracting and my face making a sour expression. As I recover from my goosebumps, I see Martha finally looking back at me, making a playful, curious expression.

What? Why is she looking at me like that? I'm not done recovering yet!

"MARTHA!!!"

The goosebumps on my body come back onto me. I stare intensely at them on my arm, in bewilderment, and quickly flick my head back to face her, shaking it right to left repeatedly, to the brink of a headache.

NO! NOO!! DO NOT LET HER IN!!!

Though I was unable to see it through my excessive head shaking, Martha smiles warmly at me.

"Thank you for forgiving my actions, young master."

She places her right hand to the left most part, above her chest, and bows to a perfect 30 degree bow, before swiftly turning around, and opening the door, as Lillian comes flying through with her fist entering the room first.

Martha elegantly grabs her slightly red fist before she falls, and stands between me and Lillian, blocking her line of sight. But not before Lillian gets a short glance at me first.

"Hey, get out of the way, who's that?"

Martha doesn't budge.

"Hey, no! I don't want to go anymore, tell me who that is!"

Martha starts moving out the door, like an immovable object, she pushes Lillian out with her.

"Hey you, boy, tell me your name! Yell it out to me quickly before this stupidly strong ox takes me away!!"

Her voice slowly fades as Martha slowly closes the door behind her.

"Now, now, young lady, let's refrain from using insults out in public. It's not very noble-like. You said you wanted to see the city right? What do you want to see first?"

"NOOOOOoooo…"

That was quite… weird. But what a fun and wholesome relationship, it's like they're mother and daughter.