Chapter XIII

They sat on my bed and I pulled the chair put from my desk to sit on it.

Nina glanced around the small room and shifted position, clearly unhappy about the state of it.

Her bedroom was probably the size of this entire apartment.

I looked at my desk and froze for a second.

Shit.

I had left the journal open the night before, too tired to put it away.

It was too risky to move it now, doing so would just draw attention to it.

It would make it look like I had something to hide.

Maybe there was a way to close it without them noticing?

I didn't particularly want then to see what I had written, especially the part about Victor.

I looked up at them, a nonchalant look plastered on my face.

It was about as convincing as wearing a Halloween costume, walking around like you were that character.

They were both staring at me.

Nina's eyes slowly moved towards the open journal.

Shitshitshit.

I can't have her see the pages!

I need a diversion.

I stood up quickly, too quickly. A wave of dizziness overcame me but i fought it off.

"Are you sure you don't want a drink?" I blurted out, way too loudly.

I cringed internally.

The expression on their faces...

They knew something was up.

Time seemed to slow down as Nina reached out for the book, slowly picking it up.

Someone whispered the word 'don't'. It must have been me.

I could feel my heart speed up and my breathing growing weaker as her eyes slowly moved across the page, taking in all the words I had written in my sleep-depriven state last night.

I watched, helpless, as she read on. She flicked to the previous page and I could feel my throat start to close up as if I were going to cry.

"This..." She didn't seem able to speak her thoughts, leaving the word to hang in the air between us.

The room felt small, like it was closing in around us. The distance between me and them both too close and too far.

I swallowed as she returned her gaze to me, anger filling her features.

It didn't suit her.

A face like that should only have the nicest of emotions on it.

"Do you even like me?" Her voice was a whisper when she finally managed to speak, as if saying the words too loudly would make them a reality.

I couldn't speak. I opened my mouth but no words came out.

I took a step towards her, reaching out my hand.

She backed away and i froze.

Hurt was written all over her features, replacing that anger.

I felt warmth on my face as a tear rolled down my cheek.

Still no words left me.

I know I should say something, I had to say something.

But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't.

She walked towards me hesitantly and i could feel hope surge through me.

Only to be obliterated into a thousand painful shards as her hand collided with my cheek.

It stung.

I deserved something worse.

My cheek was hot, a mixture of my tears and her slap.

I still couldn't speak as she barged out of my room and out of the apartment.

I looked at Rory and any positive feeling I had left disappeared.

"How could you?" He asked me before following Nina out of the door.