Chapter 2: My Life; The Life Of Kagurazaka Akane

I regret that day—the day Kobayashi got expelled. It all spiraled out of control because of a choice I made, one I can't take back. I was the one who convinced him to break the rules. At the time, it seemed harmless, even necessary. After all, who would have thought they'd actually expel him? And even if they did, wasn't it for the best? Kobayashi was a known pervert, a distraction to everyone in class. His presence made some of the girls uncomfortable, and I convinced myself that getting rid of him would benefit us all. Or at least, that's what I told myself back then.

But deep down, I know the truth. I didn't act for the good of others—I acted for myself.

I remember how Ito blamed himself, carrying the guilt as if it were his burden to bear. He genuinely believed it was his words that persuaded Kobayashi to cheat during the exam. But the truth is, Kobayashi wouldn't have listened to anyone except me. That's just how he was—someone who could only be swayed by a woman's attention. I knew this, and I used it against him.

And now? Now I live with the consequences. If Kobayashi hadn't shared those answers, we wouldn't have passed. We were unprepared, desperate. But that doesn't make what I did right. I like to tell myself I had no choice, but is that really true?

The worst part is how I handled it afterward. When the dust settled, I didn't admit what I had done. I didn't own up to my role in Kobayashi's downfall. Instead, I let everyone think I was the one who tried to help him. I crafted a story—a lie—that painted me as the hero who stood by him, as someone who had tried to save him from himself. And they believed me. They showered me with praise and admiration. It's disgusting, really. But it's the only thing I've ever been good at: maintaining appearances, playing a role, keeping everyone's eyes on the version of me that I want them to see.

On the other hand, Ito had the courage to confess his part, even if it wasn't entirely true. He bore the brunt of the blame without hesitation. Meanwhile, I basked in the undeserved fame and goodwill that followed.

I thought coming to this school would change me. I thought I'd leave my old self behind—the one who relied on manipulation and appearances to get by. But it turns out, the problem isn't the school. It's me. I'm the one who needs to change. But can I? Am I even capable of being someone better, someone honest?

And now there's Nakamura. I don't know what to do about him. He's become entangled with Aiya, and I can't shake the feeling that this will end badly. I don't trust her, not one bit. She's up to something—something that could ruin him. I've seen the way she looks at him, how her words are carefully chosen, calculated. I know for a fact, she wants to have him expelled. Why? What could she gain from it? The questions gnaw at me, but I know better than to get too close. Not while Satou Gotou is involved.

The deal with Gotou keeps me tethered, restricted. Until Monday, my hands are tied. I've been avoiding Nakamura, staying out of his way, hoping he can hold on just a little longer. After Monday, I'll be free to act. I just hope it's not too late. I've made so many mistakes already—can I afford to make another?

For now, I'll keep my distance. But the guilt, the fear, it's suffocating. Every time I see Nakamura, I feel the weight of my inaction. I wonder if he knows, if he suspects anything.

All I can do is wait. Wait and hope that this time, I'll find the courage to do the right thing.