Emily Young

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Once we got to the proper floor, Billy addressed Jacob.

 "Why don't you wait out here, son. No reason to crowd the poor woman."

 Despite his smile when asking about me moving into my new place, I could tell Jacob was a bit out of it. He had been acting a little off since hearing about Bella having a boyfriend, so it wasn't hard to understand his sudden silence.

 "Sure, Dad. I'll just sit over here." He replied distractedly. 

 We found the room number, and the door was open. As soon as his front wheels entered the room, Billy called out. "Emily… It's Billy Black, mind if we come in?"

 A soft voice responded, "Chief Black… Please, come in."

 We entered the room and opened the privacy curtain that had been drawn. This was my first look at Emily Young without her being soaked in blood. Her hair was the natural black of her people, and her tanned skin had a paleness to it that was most likely due to her loss of blood that she hadn't fully recovered from yet. She had a beautiful, full, round face and dark eyes, marred by a bandage on the right side. Her eyes were looking behind us, as if looking for someone.

 "Is Sam with you? Is he okay?"

 Billy reached up to grasp her hand. "He isn't with us." He paused as if trying to think of how to say what he wanted to. "He is devastated by what happened to you and has been in the woods since. He can't bring himself to face anyone right now."

 He paused and looked at her as if to ask if she understood his meaning. Her face showed some sadness, some relief, and then puzzlement.

 "What happened to me?"

 Billy sighed, "As far as anyone can tell. You were leaving your house and walking to your car when you must have surprised a bear, and it took a swipe at you before running off. Thomas Raizel here, heard the screaming while hiking nearby, and came running. He found you on the ground, bleeding, and did what he could to stop the blood loss. He called for an ambulance, but it would take a while to get to you, so he placed you in your car and drove you until he met the ambulance. Then you were brought here to be cared for."

 She stared at us for a moment, and Billy let her sit quietly as the information he gave her sank in. This was after all, the official version of what happened. After a long pause, she looked at me for the first time. Taking in my appearance as I had taken hers in.

 "You look like the guy Leah told me about meeting, you came across her in the woods a few months back."

 I chuckled, "That was when she called me a 'Pale Face' and told me to 'Keep to my side of the river'."

 Emily gave a half smile, "She felt really bad about that. So don't hold it against her."

 "I have spoken to her since then, and she did apologize. How are you feeling?"

 She freed her hand from Billy's and raised it to her face. The whole right side of my face feels tight, like it's being stretched." Then she ran her hand down her right arm, "My arm feels like an extra heart beating just barely off rhythm with the one in my chest. It's weird."

 Billy spoke calmly, "We are just happy you are going to be okay."

 "She brought her hand back to her face, and her expression went vague for a moment. "I imagine my face will look as ugly as my heart and soul now… How fitting."

 Billy reached for Emily, but she kept her hand on her face, so he settled for patting her leg. "Don't talk like that, Ms. Young. Things will work out."

 A tear fell from her right eye, soaking into the bandage there. "Not for everyone." She said softly.

 Billy sighed sadly, "We should leave you to heal in peace."

 Her eyes went a little panicky, as if afraid to be left alone, and she hurriedly asked, "Could… you stay for a bit, Mr. Raizel. I would like to know the person I owe my life to."

 Billy just nodded his head, "I will return to the tribe and let them know you are okay."

 I let go of the handles of his wheelchair and stepped back as he turned to maneuver his way out of the room. He closed the door behind him as he left. I walked to a chair that was at the end of the bed and sat down facing Emily.

 After a couple of minutes of staring out the window, Emily spoke. "Sam says you are like him, but different."

 "Yes. Though I think I'm cooler."

 This got a bit of a smile from her. Not a true one, just her trying to be polite to my comment.

 "What really happened? I remember saying some terrible things to Sam, and him trying to keep me at a distance. Then a flash of black and… That's all I remember."

 "From what I understand, you triggered his transformation with your words, and in that split second of change, he couldn't control his actions. The nails of his front paw gouged into you, and when he realized it, he went into a panic."

 I paused there to let it sink in. "I was close by… hunting and heard him, felt his anguish and self-hatred, all blaring out into the world. So, I came running and found you bleeding out. Shifting back requires a calm that he obviously didn't possess at the time, so there is no telling how long it would have been before anyone else could have helped you. I called my girlfriend from your home phone after stopping the bleeding from your arm and told her to get an ambulance, and her father and meet us at the reservation border. Then drove your car to meet them with you."

 "The only other option would have been a nurse Jared spoke of and an hour-long drive to some hospital up north because of the Tribe's fears about a doctor in this hospital. I am no expert, but that would have made your recovery much worse, I believe."

 I paused again, "So on the plus side, your car is waiting here for you to drive it home when you get out."

 She gave me a true halfhearted smile this time and then looked into my eyes and asked.

 "Have you also imprinted on someone?"

 I took a deep breath, "No, and hopefully that isn't part of my nature. I am in a relationship with Edythe Cullen. Though I feel the simple word relationship isn't adequate for how I feel anymore."

 Her eyes narrowed as if trying to pierce my head, "How can you be in a relationship if you know it's possible to imprint. Don't you know what that can do to her? Or don't you care?"

 "Like I said, it's possible that I won't imprint. Should I remain single for life just in case? Ignore how happy we are together?"

 "No, that's not what I mean." She sighed and went quiet for a while, lost in thought.

 "My last boyfriend was a real ass. He wanted me as a trophy girl to show off at the bars. He used to tell me he loved how others looked at him with jealousy when I was with him. At first, I was flattered that he liked my looks and wanted to show me off. Looking back, I was just happy he wanted me. But eventually I saw him for the loser Leah knew he was. It took a lot of convincing on her part to wake me up, but she is a stubborn girl. A life of drinking and being shown off at bars, between sitting at home waiting for the mailman to bring us a government check was all that was in store for me with him."

 Another tear fell from her eye, this time on the left side, so she whipped it away. "That was the reason I moved here to La Push, I wanted to be with Leah, my cousin, who is…was a sister to me. We were so happy when I first moved here, I even tricked her into thinking it was just another visit. Leah has been dating Sam for 3 years now… well had been, I guess."

 She paused again, steeling herself to continue talking. "I wanted what she had, Sam's calm love, his acceptance of her wanting to do something with her life. His drive to be more than he was, for her." She paused and stared right into my eyes. "But I didn't want hers. Not her happiness. Not her lover. Not her... Sam. How could I ever want to take any of that from her?"

 I felt the despair in her words and knew that this was no cruel girl trying to ruin someone else's happiness to fill a void in herself. Just a young woman caught between impossible choices and guilt.

 "You know, he asked me to get your permission for him to kill himself for what he did to you." The tears began to flow faster down her face, so I continued talking.

 "There is a saying that comes to mind. 'It is possible to do everything right and still lose.' If that is true, then it is possible to do nothing wrong and still hurt someone. You may not be in the wrong. Leah did nothing wrong, and Sam did nothing wrong. But someone is still going to get hurt, if not everyone."

 After a few moments of silence, of quiet tears. Emily spoke again, "In some way, I feel like I deserved this. I should be made to suffer for the rest of my life. It's not fair what I have done to Leah, what Sam and I have done. He confessed to me once that he had broken down multiple times in tears for the pain he caused Leah. He knows he loved her, and he knows that he betrayed her. Worst of all, he can't tell her why because of the Tribe's rules. I think that was when I started to fall in love with him. If he had acted like he did no wrong, or just never mentioned Leah again… I could hate him… Be disgusted by him. But he truly regrets the pain she is going through."

 I was reminded of a conversation that I had with my mom one day when she and Johnny had fought. She told me that sometimes women need to talk to someone. Not looking for help, advice, answers, or even approval of their feelings. Sometimes women just need to hear it out loud. I decided this was one of those times, so I just gave her all my attention and didn't say a word. 

 "How much should I pay for taking Sam away from Leah? Will these scars be enough, or is this just enough for me to finally admit that I love him?"

 Her eyes cleared of their doubt, and she truly focused on me. "Mr. Raizel, I want you to tell Sam that he does not have my permission to harm himself. He will live with the pain he has caused… We both will. We will not take the easy way out, and one day we will face Leah together. We will not let Leah's pain be for nothing. We will show everyone that we were meant for each other. Then maybe one day we will be able to forgive ourselves. Would you tell him that for me, please, Mr. Raizel?"

 "Call me Thomas, and I will be sure to tell him exactly what you said. You should probably get some sleep, give yourself time to heal. Oh, and don't count on the scaring to act like some sign of penance. Your doctor managed to minimize the damage, and he is confident that the facial scars will be negligible."

 Her face was hard to read when I told her that, but she replied quietly. "Thanks, Thomas. Could you also tell Sam that I want to see him today, no excuses."

 I stood up and gave her a smile as I walked to the privacy curtain and closed it before leaving the room. I could hear the soft sobs as she broke down in a way she was too proud to let happen in my presence.