chapter 13

Chapter 13

Ronin had attempted to follow Percy and Wren around as an ally when rather he was a stranger, an outcast trying to blend in with their warmth. Soon after, it had to end as he joined his father in the car again after school; a word or two was spoken before Ronin began to fill the car with thoughts that held his head in a grip; he almost assumed his father could hear it too.

He pondered the day, deciding on its worth. Percy's nature had come to mind, that kind of worth he knew people counted on, for even Percy's perfect effect had somehow transferred to Wren, but how, how did she change so fast? So much.

These questions lingered in the back of his head, the front was mostly chaotic and abrupt. And it would've gotten louder if not for his father's attempt at conversation, "how was your first day?" he stated, completely lacking the tone of a question, as well as eye contact.

Ronin looked at his father's concentrated face, holding his eyebrows in a scrunched wrinkle above his eyes.

"It was fine," Ronin responded, trying to state it like his father, a behavior he hadn't realized he had grappled with.

The poor conversation had ended quickly as a rather big building painted itself outside his window.

Ronin's fists clenched as he exited the car, following his father to the door; a large sign gleamed on the brick walls highlighting the words he pushed away, "a rehabilitation center." he felt pathetic entering the building, which soon reeked of others' problems.

He stood shoving his hands in the cold jacket that covered his inner fear, it had found a way out through his jumpy eyes and hypervigilant appease. He could hear every word his father said to the secretary, two times over and louder as he kept talking.

It still rings in his head when again following his leading father down the hall of the building; its walls were clean as if they attempted to hide the greasy, dirty words that lay behind them.

A steep staircase and a tight right turn that the carpet pattern failed to follow had led him to an awaiting spruce door. With a pat on Ronin's sweaty back and a word or two, his father vanished from the small hall, his afraid presence leaving with him.

Upon entering the room, Ronin was met with a tall woman, his smile attempted to match her height as it stretched across her face. She greeted him with a slow handshake and an introduction, she led Ronin to a seat almost centered on the room. He watched as she sat down with an extra positive attitude he couldn't understand, nor the continued smile that seemed to get bigger as he returned her introduction, his rather frantic eyes read the label on her desk "Mrs. Camble" he read ultimately insulted as he had to read it again before he fully understood it.

He had only now realized his vision shifted like his chest, he was sure, had leaped out of his sweaty skin; his hands began to tense in a tight lock he could only strain through as he continued the same motion with each finger. Whatever she was saying was too much, everything was changing, it was too fast, too much.

He leaped from his chair almost unconsciously, storming towards the door he dreaded; his father had left; it was just him; he couldn't do it; he couldn't be alone with the thoughts that crowded his mind, and for now, the front began to speak.

He pulled on the door, sinking deeper into his unwanted fear; shaking the door, the rest of the room seemed to disappear, evaporate under his stress.

The woman hadn't moved a muscle, he legs still crossed on her loose chair, its leather sticking to her thighs.

The only change was the smile that left with his panic; she waited without a word, watching Ronin's every movement with concentration.

He turned to her with a sudden anger, "open the door" he growled staring back at her

Before applying more pressure to the solid door, "Ronin I'm not going to open the door"

She said with a calm demeanor, awaiting his eye contact again.

"Open the fucking door!" He cried, slamming his hand against the hard surface before defeatedly sinking into the corner that was shaped around the exit; the same words repeated shakily as he hit the ground of the room.

Mrs. Camble had left her desk, and a look of pity seemed to print on her face; clear and concise, it almost glowed.

She bent down, pulling her skirt over her sharp knees in the process; she met Ronin at eye level, following his large jacket down his sprawled legs that lay defeated in the small space.

"Why do you want to leave Ronin?" She asked, tilting her head at the question, "Don't treat me like I'm some pathetic ass kid," his weary voice muffled from the wall he built as he buried his head in his legs that moved up quickly in defense.

"I-it just too loud," he managed to say, gripping the jeans that lay over his legs.

The woman peered into the corner, breathing in the words he said. She drew closer, sitting amongst him, suddenly feeling the weight of the words as she coughed, sitting on her bent knees next to him. "I understand," she said, looking at his body language for a reaction.

"No, you don't," Ronin muscled the courage to say; he didn't know why he was there when he knew full well that not a solid could ever understand what he meant.

"If it's too loud, we can turn it down," the woman said softly.

Ronin perked up from his protection meeting his confident eyes with a confused expression, his eyes suddenly gliding with her arm as she reached for the light. Gripping her fingers around the small tab, she pulled it down slightly, glancing around the room as the lights dimmed slightly.

She then met Ronin, who had emerged from his shelter, watching the room as she did so.

"Wanna try?" She asked looking into his spoken eyes, that seemed to glance repetitively from the light to her, "that won't work" Ronin protested with a sour tone that echoed in a scratch.

"Ok" she said before dimming the lights this time darker, she observed ronin's quick glance, it avoided her.

With a slow push the room began to light again, Ronins eyes glued to hers and then her are, and I'm one swift movement she had flicked the light to its full range, filling the room with a cold sensles light.

Ronin could feel his chest begin to pound

The fast words he hadn't noticed stop began again, it got louder. Before Ronin could notice he threw himself forward latching his shaking hand to the light, a strange feeling came over him as he held the tab in a tight grip, he began to protest against his own decision, that or the voice from his head he couldn't tell anymore.

Ronins eyebrows scrunched as he quickly hit the light enveloping the room in a dark hume. His eyes widened as the space grew quiet, it was a peace he never expected, nor experienced, his thoughts calmed like the light, it wasn't gone but it was quiet he could've talked over it if he wanted to, Ronin leaned back against the wall in a relief.

It was clear, Ronin couldn't

Just make it disappear, he had to beat it to a whisper a mere reminder of what he's fighting for.