An attempted new beginning

Kiyomi could hardly believe what Akio had just told her. The voice that made him hurt Kevin was supposed to be his own? Maybe Akio was just repeating words in his head, she thought. Nothing else made sense. But then, who else could have said it to him?

On the way home, Kiyomi decided to set the thought aside. After all, he was still just a child. She herself had had similar thoughts when she was younger. The bigger problem was Akio's anger. She still needed to talk to him about it.

When they arrived home, Kiyomi wanted to talk to Akio immediately, but he walked straight to his room with his head down and shoulders slumped, saying nothing. She could see the tension on his face and grew more worried.

Akio didn't understand what was happening either. The voice, his mother's strange behavior—everything frightened him. Who had hit his mother? Why hadn't she hit him back? He understood nothing.

He felt awful. But more than that, he thought about how his mother must feel worse than he did—and all because of him. He needed time to think and locked himself in his room. Was the voice really his own?

Kiyomi knocked on Akio's door.

Kiyomi: "Akio, can you hear me?"

Akio: "..."

Kiyomi: "We need to talk."

Akio: "I don't want to."

Kiyomi: "Neither do I, but we have to."

Akio: "Turn around and leave."

Kiyomi: "Why did you lock yourself in? I want to understand what's bothering you."

Akio: "I don't know what my thoughts are. Am I thinking right?"

Kiyomi: "It's normal if your thoughts aren't good. That happens to everyone sometimes."

Akio: "How do you know that?"

Kiyomi: "Because I'm human too, Akio. I've made mistakes and had bad thoughts sometimes."

Akio: "You're not like me. You're my mom."

Kiyomi: "I'm not just your mother, I'm also a person. You can have more than one role."

Akio: "What do you mean?"

Kiyomi: "Everyone has many roles. Your classmates are children, friends, and actors, all at the same time. Do you remember the School Play at your last year in Ms. Wirsings Class?"

Akio: "I never thought of it that way."

Kiyomi: "And I'm not just your mom—I can also be your advisor. Your thoughts aren't wrong, but some things shouldn't be spoken aloud. Thought can be bad, but you have to control what you`re saying and what not."

Akio: "What does that mean?"

Kiyomi: "When you speak good thoughts, others think about them. Bad thoughts too."

Akio: "And then?"

Kiyomi: "You carry responsibility for your thoughts. They can influence others."

Akio: "But you say bad things too!"

Kiyomi: "What makes you think that?"

Akio: "You told that man he didn't deserve help."

Kiyomi: "What Man? ...Oh, that...That was a different situation..."

Akio: "And you told him to go to hell."

Kiyomi: "I wasn't being completely honest."

Akio: "So you lied to me? Why did you lie to me?"

Kiyomi: "To protect you."

Akio: "You always said we shouldn't lie. But you did."

Kiyomi: "I only wanted the best for you."

Akio: "Are you really my mom?"

Akio doubted her, and silent tears welled up in his eyes. The uncertainty wrapped around him. Why was she acting so strange? This wasn't the mom he knew. He had not expected such a reaction from her.

Kiyomi: "I'm sorry, Akio. I didn't mean to scare you."

Akio: "How can I still believe you?"

Kiyomi: "Come out, and I'll tell you something only your mother would know."

Akio: "It's safer here."

Kiyomi: "Are you afraid of me?"

Akio: "Yes. I don't even know if you're still my mom."

Kiyomi: "I know what it's like to be full of anger. I was like you once."

Akio: "You were a 13-year-old boy?"

Kiyomi: "No, but I was violent too. I don't want you to suffer like I did."

Akio: "Why are you doing this?"

Kiyomi: "Because you're my son, and I love you."

Akio: "I don't understand that."

Kiyomi: "That's the biggest reason of all. Love makes you brave, you know?"

Akio: "Why aren't you angry?"

Kiyomi: "Because I've experienced love. I didn't want to feel it for a long time because I was afraid of it. Love leads to more love, but anger only leads to more anger. It's a cycle that's hard to break."

Akio: "But a circle has an end, doesn't it?"

Kiyomi: "You'll understand that someday."

But Akio didn't understand. How could his mother not be angry? When Akio got angry, he shouted or hit back. Why didn't she do the same? Maybe it was because she was stronger than him, because she knew something he didn't understand. It made him even more confused and left him doubting himself. Why couldn't he be like that? What was missing in him to find that calm?

But Akio didn't want to disappoint his mother. Maybe that was exactly what he was supposed to feel.

The last weeks of his suspension, Akio tried to act normal and follow his mother's advice before returning to school.

Let me know if you'd like further tweaks or improvements!