Chapter 112: "The Curse of the Rubber Chicken"

The Artifact of Absurdity—an enchanted rubber chicken glowing faintly with an ominous green hue—was now in Kazuya's hands. The group had left the Valley of Velvety Vibrations behind, but the artifact's strange aura lingered in the air like the scent of burnt toast.

"This thing feels... wrong," Sylvara muttered, eyeing the chicken with suspicion.

Kazuya squeezed it experimentally. It let out a high-pitched, squeaky squawk, followed by a low, ominous rumble.

"That can't be good," Ravynne said, crossing her arms.

"It's a rubber chicken," Kazuya said with a shrug. "How bad could it be?"

As if in response, the ground beneath them began to tremble.

Chicken-Powered Chaos

The trembling grew stronger, and before anyone could react, a massive shadow loomed over them.

"Oh no," Lady Plume whispered, her eyes widening.

From the distance came a thunderous clucking, and over the hill appeared... a chicken. But not just any chicken—this was a giant, feathered monstrosity, easily the size of a house, with glowing red eyes and a comb that sparkled like sequins.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?!" Ravynne shouted, smacking Kazuya on the back of the head.

"I didn't do anything!" Kazuya protested, holding up the artifact. "I just squeezed it!"

The giant chicken let out a deafening crow, shaking the ground. In response, the rubber chicken in Kazuya's hands squeaked again, and a second rumble echoed through the air.

"Don't squeeze it again!" Sylvara snapped.

"Too late!" Kazuya shouted as the artifact emitted a burst of green light, summoning a second giant chicken. This one was wearing a top hat.

The Chicken Stampede

The newly summoned chicken turned to the first, tipping its hat politely before they both turned their glowing eyes on the group.

"We're gonna die," Ravynne said flatly.

"No, we're not!" Kazuya declared, pulling out his sword. "We'll just—"

Before he could finish, the chickens charged.

The group scattered, dodging feathers the size of mattresses and claws that tore through the ground like plows. Cluckles and Fluffnugget, meanwhile, seemed to take offense to the presence of their oversized kin and began squawking furiously.

"Cluckles, no!" Kazuya yelled as the rooster charged the top-hatted chicken.

Fluffnugget followed, hopping valiantly toward the other giant bird.

"This is ridiculous," Sylvara muttered, blasting a fireball at the ground to distract the chickens.

"No kidding," Ravynne agreed, firing arrows at the top hat.

An Unlikely Ally

As the chaos unfolded, a voice called out from a nearby hill.

"Hold your ground, travelers!"

Everyone turned to see an older woman standing confidently, her long, flowing robes embroidered with tiny chickens. She held a staff topped with an intricately carved chicken head.

"Who the heck is that?" Kazuya asked.

"I am Madame Featherlyn," the woman announced, striking a dramatic pose. "Guardian of the Cluckening."

"The what?" Ravynne shouted as a giant chicken narrowly missed her with its talons.

"There's no time to explain!" Featherlyn said, pointing her staff at the rubber chicken. "That artifact is a key to controlling the Great Fowl Spirits. You must use it wisely!"

Kazuya held up the artifact. "Define 'wisely!'"

"Don't squeeze it randomly!"

The Power of Poultry

Featherlyn began chanting in an ancient language, her staff glowing as a golden aura surrounded the group. The chickens paused mid-attack, their glowing eyes flickering.

"Now!" Featherlyn shouted. "Speak the words of control!"

"What words?!" Kazuya yelled back.

"Any chicken pun will do!"

Kazuya stared at her, dumbfounded. "Are you serious?"

"Just do it!"

Taking a deep breath, Kazuya raised the rubber chicken. "Alright, big guy... beak-calm!"

The artifact emitted another burst of light, and the giant chickens froze in place. Slowly, they shrank down to normal chicken size, clucking harmlessly at their feet.

"It worked," Sylvara said, sounding equal parts relieved and incredulous.

Aftermath

As the dust settled, Featherlyn approached the group, her expression stern.

"The Artifact of Absurdity is not to be trifled with," she said. "Its power is unpredictable and often ridiculous."

"No kidding," Kazuya muttered, eyeing the rubber chicken warily.

Featherlyn smiled. "However, you handled yourselves well. Perhaps you are worthy of the trials ahead."

"Trials?" Ravynne groaned. "Why is it always trials?"

Featherlyn didn't answer. Instead, she turned and began walking away, her chicken-embroidered robes billowing dramatically in the wind.

"Great," Kazuya said, slipping the rubber chicken into his bag. "More trials."

"And more chickens," Ravynne added.

As they continued on their journey, the group couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of their latest adventure. But deep down, Kazuya had a sinking feeling that their poultry-related troubles were far from over.