JFK Airport – Chaos, Of Course
Getting a bunch of highly dangerous, unpredictable psychopaths onto an international flight?
Not easy.
In fact, it was a f*ing miracle** they even made it past security.
Alex stood in the middle of JFK Airport, watching his so-called 'team' descend into madness.
Deadpool had already stolen someone's luggage cart and was using it as a skateboard, zooming through the terminal.
Butcher was already drinking. At 9 AM.
Hughie looked like he wanted to die.
Frenchie was explaining (in horrifying detail) how easy it was to smuggle C4 onto a plane.
Kimiko just stood there, arms crossed, silently judging everyone.
Alex sighed deeply.
Why was he like this? Why did he make bad life choices?
Security Check – Disaster Edition
"Alright, everyone, listen up," Alex clapped his hands. "We're getting on this plane without causing an international incident. Got it?"
No one got it.
Because one minute later—
Deadpool was immediately tackled by TSA agents.
"WHAT?! YOU CAN'T ARREST ME FOR BEING SEXY!" Wade screamed as he was dragged away.
Alex pinched the bridge of his nose.
This was gonna be a long trip.
Mid-Flight – The Madness Continues
Somehow, by the grace of God or Thanos, they actually made it onto the flight.
But it didn't get better.
Frenchie smuggled a flask onto the plane.
Deadpool somehow sweet-talked the flight attendants into bringing him free alcohol.
Butcher was already snoring, taking up two seats.
Kimiko had the window seat and was actually behaving.
Hughie looked miserable.
Alex was questioning his entire life.
"Oi," Butcher muttered, cracking one eye open. "Tell me again why the f*** we're flyin' to India?"
Alex exhaled. "I told you. I got a lead."
"But you won't tell us what the lead is," Hughie pointed out, sipping his ginger ale.
Alex just shrugged.
Because yeah, no way was he explaining the mystical RPG quest in his brain.
Frenchie took a sip from his flask. "You know, mon ami… mysterious leads always end in either great fortune or great catastrophe."
Deadpool leaned in. "Or a great big f*ing explosion.**"
Hughie groaned. "You guys are giving me anxiety."
Alex sighed. "Just… trust me, alright? We'll find out when we get there."
Deadpool dramatically threw his arms up. "MYSTERY TRIP!"
And with that, they settled in for the long flight to Mumbai.
But Alex?
He couldn't shake the feeling that this trip was about to get very, very complicated.