Chapter 46

Bryan's POV

What was I thinking? What the hell was I thinking really? I was such a damn fool. I ruined my life because of that bitch. She really took me for a damn ride. I thought what I was doing was right. I really didn't know that I was wrong the whole time. I hurt my daughter and Maya because I was selfishly thinking about myself and my own happiness. Being happy was my only goal, but I guess it was too much to ask. And now, I lost everything.

The truth is, I am a werewolf. When I was young, I always fantasized about finding my mate. The one who is fated for me. It's one of the most fundamental things for a werewolf, besides being part of a pack. I lived my life looking forward to the day I could meet the girl of my destiny. When I got to high school, I got the pressure to see girls like other guys as puberty hit home. I thought that I would have fun and not let anything get serious if I met my mate.

But then, I met Maya. She was the most beautiful girl in school and everyone wanted her. She was reserved and not like any other girl. Most girls were obnoxious and just threw themselves on guys like a piece of meat. Plain Bimbos. I liked them for one reason. I would never get attached enough to fall in love. It was just sex and that's it. When I found my mate, it would be easy to get together without a complicated past. With Maya, it was different. Maya was so innocent and lively that it was hard to look the other way. I tried to deny my growing interest and feelings for her for as long as possible, but I failed miserably.

I found myself wanting to protect her from everyone else and be the guy by her side and soon enough, I completely fell for her. As I remember, that feeling was scary. I was confused, and I tried to ignore that feeling and suppress it. I couldn't love Maya. I was supposed to love my mate. I knew I was in a bind, but the more I tried to avoid it, the more I was drawn to her. I could deny it for much longer.

I found myself confessing my love for her and then started our love story. I loved her truly, but at the back of my mind, I thought about the one who was to be my mate. Maya was human, therefore there was no hope she could be my mate. It's certainly not impossible, but a werewolf having a human mate was rare. I was worried about the future when I would have to decide to either stay with Maya and have her as my chosen mate or accept my fated mate.

It weighed on my heart that I might have to separate from Maya, but I knew that I had given her my heart. I loved only her and there was no longer space for anyone else. Time went by, but I still hadn't found my mate. Many thoughts came to mind. Usually, if a werewolf doesn't find its mate, it's either they are far away or they have died. If my mate had died, I would have sensed it, but I didn't.

I was kind of relieved that I hadn't found her yet. The thought of separating from Maya was unbearable. My parents were concerned about my decision, but they were supportive of me and that was all that mattered. More time went by, and I was now married and had a baby on the way. Maya gave birth to my daughter Brielle. My joy knew no bounds. Even without my mate, I found happiness with the woman I loved. And I thought that would last forever, but reality set in.

I don't know what exactly changed in me, but I was slowly becoming unhappy with my life. I tried so much to be happy but. I couldn't help it. I was going crazy and soon the love Maya and I shared seemed to vanish. We did nothing but fight, and it put a strain on our family. It was not Maya's fault. It was my fault. In the process, I was hurting my family. I started to hate myself.

A woman came to work in my company and something strange happened. Sandra Miller. I found out that she was my mate. After years of thinking I would never meet my mate, she appeared in front of me. I strengthened my resolve, and I was determined to break off my link with her, but it proved to be difficult. My mind won over my heart and I found myself embroiled in an affair with her. Each time I tried to stop, I just kept getting deeper and deeper and soon there was no way out.

I was in too deep. The guilt was eating me alive thinking about my betrayal of Maya, but the bond was too strong. I cursed myself, but nothing was going to change what I had done. Moreover, we found out that Sandra was pregnant. It was a bittersweet moment. I betrayed my wife and daughter. I made a decision right then. It was not easy, but I gave it a lot of thought. I was not going to continue to be unfair to Maya. She deserved better. I failed her and the vows we took on our wedding day. It was crushing to know that, after all, I was the reason she got hurt. I still loved her for sure, but I didn't deserve to cling to that love anymore.

I made a mistake. I went to end things on my daughter's birthday. I agree that was a bit nasty and I ruined my daughter's birthday. I wanted to hit my head on the wall. That was so inconsiderate of me. Why couldn't we just wait one more day to end things? I ended up hitting her, which I didn't mean to. I just got frustrated because of Sandra's sudden appearance. I ended up regretting it a lot, but it was of no use. There was no turning back. Even if it breaks my heart, I figured everything played out for the best. It was better that Brielle and Maya hated me.

I knew from then that I didn't deserve happiness. I was back at the same place I came from. I felt like Sandra and I were forcing things. Even though we were fated, we were not meant to be. I brushed off that thought and tried to live in the moment. What was done? I couldn't send my daughter off. I knew she was leaving town to go and live with her grandparents. I was too ashamed to show my face. I hope that one day, we will talk it out, and I will get a chance to try and explain myself and maybe rekindle our relationship.

I didn't think that it would be like this. I am back here in this town as a failure of a man. It's probably karma. My stupid decisions are the ones that led me here, but that is not all. There is more to this than what brought me here. There is a lot that has happened in the last couple of months. They have been a rollercoaster of madness. I barely survived before I got here. My daughter is in danger. All this while, I had failed to be a good and proper father to her, but now I've got nothing to lose. I will make amends and keep my daughter safe from those lunatics. I'll never fail my family again. That is a promise.