two

When I walked in through the front door, I saw my parents sitting at the dining table. There was a lingering tension in the air as I approached, which I suspected was because of today's session.'Hi, Mom, Dad, ' I greeted, sitting down at the table, and grabbing an orange. I wasn't hungry, but I was nervous.'How's Alex?' Mom started, cutting up an apple.'Great, you know, the usual,' I shrugged.'And Sarah?''She's fine too, ' I hadn't heard from Sarah in the past two weeks.There was silence after, then, 'We talked to Dr. Matthews today.'I sighed, 'Ofcourse, you did.''Mira, if it weren't for Dr. Matthews, we wouldn't even know what's going on.''Nothing's going on, Mom!' I exploded, standing up, 'If you would just listen to me for once-"Mom frowned in confusion, 'What are yo-'I interrupted her, 'I asked you-begged you to give me some damn space!' I saw them opening their mouths to argue, so I continued, 'But all you care about is what everyone else thinks. Everyone except me.'I turned around, running up the stairs and heading straight towards my bed. I heard them calling out but the door slamming shut cut them off halfway through.'Mira-''That's no-'I felt frustrated, and angry. I tried to sleep, but couldn't.My anger subsided while I was busy tossing and turning through the night. In that moment, I wished I was anywhere but here.After hours of no sleep, I decided to go to the nearby playground. It was 2.17 a.m. in the morning. My mind was screaming at me to not go, but the guilt overwhelmed any precautions I had.I had sneaked out of my window a dozen times before since it wasn't that high off on the ground. Besides, there was a tree left of my window, so it really wasn't that difficult.The only time you had to be careful was while walking on the ledger. It was really thin, so using it while drunk was not an option.Jumping down onto the grass, I looked back to my parents' bedroom window. The lights were turned off which meant that they were sleep.Mom's a really light sleeper so I have to be careful sometimes.The road was empty at this empty as I walked over to the park. It was only five blocks away; not too big and not too small.People usually start coming in after 5 a.m. Noon is the busiest, and the noisiest hour, since all the kids from the neighborhood come out to play as well. I always try to avoid the park around that time.I was starting to feel a little cold, and wished that I brought along a jacket.I sat at a swing, swinging back and forth a little. I felt somewhat peaceful as the cold air hit my face, and breezed through my hair.I used to love chilling with Alex here in the park during late hours. But, for the past two weeks, I'd been too paranoid to go anywhere alone. I missed it. I wished Alex was here too.I wondered giving him a call, but immediately thought against it. I just needed to be alone right now, besides he was probably sleeping. It was a school night.I sighed loudly, realizing that it was a school night for me as well. The school had been generous enough to grant me two weeks off, but that was as gracious as they were willing to be.I didn't want to think about it, but the nervousness consumed my thoughts. Sarah had, in fact, texted me last week. We had exchanged a couple of texts, but when she'd asked if she could come over, I'd all but ghosted her.She'd asked a couple of times actually, but I almost always gave her an excuse. I was just surprised that she hadn't tagged along with Alex yet, although he'd mentioned that she'd cornered him a couple of times at school.It wasn't that I didn't want to see her, it's just that we hadn't exactly been on speaking terms before. But, knowing Sarah, she was just pretending that nothing had happened. I honestly didn't know why she did, but I hated it.Then, there was the other matter. Matt.I had all but ignored all texts and calls from Matt the entire two weeks. He'd even shown up to my house a couple of times, but I told my parents to make him go away.I really didn't know how to face him. I don't even know how I'd ended up in this relationship, or why. Yes, he's hot, and really good at partying-but, that's all that he's good at.Besides, he's Sarah's ex. I had to have been drunk to end up in this situation.As much as Alex and Matt hated each other, he'd still approached Alex a couple of times to ask about me. Alex had pretty much delivered the breakup message to Matt, but the latter didn't seem to get it.I knew it has to come from me.Tomorrow is going to be wild, I knew it. I wasn't ready for it. I really didn't want to go, but had no choice. Homeschooling wasn't an option.I looked around for the basketball court. Anxiety about tomorrow-amongst other things, was starting to get to me. I needed to do something.I wasn't exactly athletic, but I'd liked playing it with Alex. He was really good at it, and was also on the school team.But, I could still score a goal, or two.I dribbled the ball one, two, three times, before shooting it for the hoop. At 5'4, I wasn't exactly tall so I had to make up for it in strength. At least, that's what Alex told me all the time.It missed, hitting the board instead. I ran to catch the ball, dribbling it towards a good angle before taking another shot.It went through.I took a couple more shots before deciding to head back. I'd worked up quite a sweat, but at least I didn't feel cold anymore.I hit the pillows, exhausted. In no time, I was asleep.'Mira!'I turned around just in time for Lila to throw herself at me. She was a few inches shorter than me, but still managed to overpower me every single time.I hit the ground, with Lila laughing atop me.'Ow, what the hell, Lil?' I grumbled, rubbing the back of my head.She grinned, 'Sorry!' She didn't look sorry at all; I scowled.She threw her hands up, 'Okay, okay, ' She pulled me up along with herself, before giving me an excited look, 'Dad's taking us to farmhouse!'I squealed, and we both hugged, jumping around in excitement.Lila's dad owned a farmhouse just outside of town. Lila had been there a couple of times before, and had told me how there were all sorts of animals from horses, to chickens, to pigs. She'd named every single one of them.'Oh, Mira, I can't wait for you to meet Woolie!! He's sooo cuteee!'We both giggled, lying in the grass side-by-side and staring up at the sky.I suddenly remembered something, and sat up, 'Wait, Lil, I can't remember all of their names,' I panicked, turning towards Lila, 'You have to tell me their names again!'Lila sat up too with a very serious look on face, 'Okay, it's okay. So, there's Woolie, ofcourse. An-''Lil! Mira!' Lila's father, Mr. Montgomery, called us from inside the house. 'Come on, we have to get going.'We both looked at each other with wide eyes. Then, Lila stood up, looking at me with a serious look, 'Okay, Mira, don't worry. I'll have you to revise it over in the car.'I nodded eagerly, following Lila towards the garage. We sat in the backstreet together, with Lila telling me all the names until I had them memorized.'So, Mira, you excited?' Mr. Montgomery looked up at us through the rearview mirror.I nodded, excited, 'Yes, Mr. Montgomery, I'm so excited! Thanks so much for letting me tag along!'His eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled, 'Mira, how many times have I told you to just call me Adam? Besides, you're family.'I smiled sheepishly, 'Sorry, Adam!'He laughed at this, 'You got it, kiddo!'Lila had told me that the farmhouse was surrounded by miles upon miles of grass. There were also apple trees all around the place. Although, she'd confessed that she found a worm in one of the apples, so I wasn't exactly looking to that.'Oh, Mira, look, we're here!!! We're finally here!' Lila jumped out of the car as soon as the car stopped.'Girls! Careful, now!'But, we weren't listening as we ran towards the barn, hand-in-hand. The barn door was already halfway open, so we sneaked in, laughing and giggling.My laughter vanished when I saw all the animals, awestruck, 'Woah!'I walked forward, ignoring Lila, and just looking at the animals in wonder. Towards the end, when one of the pigs looked at me, and snickered, I jumped back, scared.I didn't realize there was a horse behind me, until it neighed. I screamed, running towards Lila.Lila laughed when she saw me running, 'Mira, you're such a scaredy cat!'I scowled, but still remained close behind Lila, 'No, I'm not.''Liar!' She laughed, then grabbed my hand, pulled me towards the scary horse, 'Come on, I'll introduce you!'I struggled, but she was stronger. She pulled me in front of her, saying, 'Mira, say hi to Milo.''Hello, ' I said in a quivering voice. Milo neighed again, and I tried not to run away.'Milo, this is my friend, Mira. Be nice to her, okay?' She tried sounding stern, but it only made me laugh. Milo neighed again then lowered his head towards us.I tried not to panic as Lila reached over to pat him. Then, she pulled me to do the same.I tried to reason, 'But, if he doesn't like me? You know horses don't like strangers!''You're not a stranger, Mira, you're a friend. I just told him, weren't you listening?' She pulled me, and I was patting Milo.He neighed at the touch, 'Oh, look, he likes you already!' She clasped her hands in satisfaction.I frowned at her, then looked at the horse, trying to figure out if he actually likes me, 'How do you know if he likes me?''He's still letting you pat his head, isn't he?''Yes, but-''No buts! If he didn't like you, he would've kicked you away by now.' My eyes widened in fear, as I looked back at the horse who was now staring at me.His face suddenly looked evil; I could hear his mocking laughter in my ears.I squealed in surprise, rushing to hide behind Lila.'You're such a wimp, Mira!''That's rude!'I followed her as we walked out of the barn.'I thought you wanted to meet Ollie, Woolie, Mila, and everyone else..''I did, I was just-' I pretended to think, trying to find the right word. I just didn't want to admit that I was scared, 'You know-''Scared?' She deadpanned.I rolled my eyes, 'Whatever, what does it matter?'I pushed her out of the way, running up the stairs to the house.'Girls!' Mr. Montgomery called from somewhere in the house.'Dad!' Lila called, pushing past me, 'Where are you?'We were in the middle of trying to push each other, so we didn't hear Mr. Montgomery finding us.'Girls, what are you doing?' He frowned at us, grabbing each of us off the other.We were still trying to reach for the other, 'What's going on with you?''Mira's a scaredy-cat!'Mr. Montgomery frowned in confusion, 'What? What does that mean?''Am not!' I argued, ignoring Mr. Montgomery as he kept trying to keep the two of us away from each other.'Are too!''You're wrong!''Quiet! Hush!' Mr. Montgomery said loudly, interrupting the two of us. We shut up.'Now, then, we'll discuss this later, ' He got up, pushing the two of us towards the basement, 'But, right now, I want to show you two something.''In the basement?' I quivered, just as Lila asked, 'Is that room?''Come on,' Mr. Montgomery pushed the two of us forward, walking behind us.I tried to get closer to Mr. Montgomery, the darkness getting to me. While Lila rushed ahead in the dim lighting, excitement radiating of off her.I wrinkled my nose, smelling cow feed in the room. The basement was brimming with boxes upon boxes of stuff, collecting dust on shelves. Everything for the one bulb dangling from the ceiling at the end of the stairs, there weren't anymore light sources.I was wondering how Mr. Montgomery could even come down here because of the low ceiling when I heard Lila squealing, 'Dad! Oh my god, it's so pretty!'Mr. Montgomery rushed me ahead as we walked towards the door on the left. I hadn't noticed before-too warped in my fear, but there was light shining from the door being partially open.When I stepped inside, it was like I'd stepped into a crossover world of Wizard of Oz meets Barbie. I couldn't decide if I loved the color scheme, or hated it.'I love it!' I exclaimed after a minute, still awestruck.'I love it too!' Lila exclaimed, jumping of off the road and rushing to hug Mr. Montgomery, 'And I love you, Dad! Thank you, thank you, thank you! This is the best present ever!'I watched with a smile on my face as Mr. Montgomery hugged her back, saying, 'Oh, I love you too, Lila.'I gasped, waking up, and feeling like a fish out of water.As I tried to catch my breath, I felt silent tears slipping out of my eyes, and into my hair.I don't know how long I lay there, crying silently, and wishing that-for the millionth time, I was anyone but Mirabel Peters.