CHAPTER 12: INDELIBLE

The years passed by like a blur. After the tragic death of Sunghoon, a part of Eunha went numb, consumed by grief and the guilt of not being able to save him. Her once vibrant self now lived in a shadow, haunted by the memories of that fateful day.

Meanwhile, any hopes of a loving partnership between Eunha and Jake evaporated after Sunghoon's passing. Their relationship became strained and brittle, the shared trauma only pushing them further apart.

Eunha's heart was shattered, her soul forever marked by the loss of the one person who genuinely understood her beyond the expectations of others. Her life seemed to lose color, and happiness became an elusive phantom. She threw herself into work, throwing herself into projects as a way to escape her pain, but the empty feeling inside her only grew.

The break off of the engagement left Eunha in a mix of feelings - a sense of relief mingled with a strange void. With the weight of Jake's expectations lifted off her shoulders, she felt a semblance of freedom, like a bird released from a cage. Yet, the absence of Sunghoon in her life still lingered like a specter, casting a shadow over any happiness she might have once hoped for.

Despite the freedom that came with the dissolution of her engagement with Jake, Eunha couldn't help but feel a profound sadness. The memory of Sunghoon still haunted her every move, a constant reminder of the one person who understood her in ways Jake never could.

One afternoon, Eunha decided to clean her room, collected all the old items and trinkets into a big box. She then carried the box over to the store room, stacking it next to other boxes filled with the remnants of her past.

As she finished stacking the box, Eunha's gaze shifted, and her eyes landed on a small, unassuming item labeled with her name. Curiosity piqued, she reached for it, her hands trembling slightly.

It was a brown envelope, yellowed with time, and it bore her name written in neat handwriting. Eunha's heart quickened as she held it in her hands, unsure of what she might discover inside.

Eunha looked down at the envelope, and her breath caught in her throat as she noticed the date on it. It was sent, precisely 5 years ago, just one day before the tragic accident involving the incident. The realization hit her like a wave, and her heart thumped even faster in her chest.

Seeing the envelope and its significance, Eunha's mind instantly filled with memories and questions: Why did Sunghoon send her a letter just a day before his life tragically ended? What could it possibly contain?

Trembling slightly, Eunha ran her fingers lightly over the envelope, the touch of it bringing an onslaught of emotions. She could almost hear the echo of Sunghoon's voice in her mind, urging her to open it.

Eunha walked into the living room, holding the envelope tightly in her hand. Her mother was sitting nearby, and seeing the serious expression on Eunha's face, her mother knew something was amiss.

"Mom, can I ask you something?" Eunha started, her voice a little shaky.

Her mother looked up, sensing the gravity in her daughter's tone. "Of course, dear. What is it?" she asked, her eyes filled with concern.

Eunha held up the envelope, still clutched tightly in her grasp. "I found this in the store room. Do you know anything about it?" she asked, her voice tinged with both hope and trepidation.

Her mother leaned forward and examined the envelope closely. "Hmm, that envelope seems familiar but I can't quite remember. Why? Is there something wrong?", she asked with a puzzled expression.

Her mom sat up straighter as recognition flickered across her face. "Ah, that's right," she said, her tone pensive. "Now I remember. That envelope arrived when you weren't home. It was supposed to be placed on the living room table, but I think the maid might have mistaken it for some regular mail and put it in the store room during her cleaning."

This revelation didn't alleviate Eunha's growing intrigue but instead added another layer to the mystery. She wondered how could a letter, addressed specifically to her and sent by Sunghoon just before the unfortunate accident, end up in the storeroom, out of sight for five long years.

A mix of emotions swirled inside her; surprise, confusion, and a touch of anticipation. She knew she had to open the envelope to uncover the secrets it held, but the fear of the unknown also gave her pause.

With the envelope in hand, Eunha walked back to her room. Once there, she shut the door behind her, shutting out the world for a moment. She placed the envelope carefully on the desk before taking a seat.

The silence in the room was almost overwhelming as she stared at the envelope, her thoughts racing. It felt as if it was a portal to the past, a chance to hear Sunghoon's words one last time.

As Eunha carefully opened the envelope, her eyes widened with surprise. It was not just a single letter that she had expected but multiple letters, all neatly stacked and tied with a red ribbon.

Beneath the letters, a delicate necklace was tucked, its shimmering pendant catching the light of the room. Eunha gently lifted it, running her fingers over the cool, smooth surface.

As her fingers traced the necklace's delicate features, a flood of memories rushed back. Her mind replayed the memory of their first hang out at the mall, the way Sunghoon had been fixated on the necklace. She could still hear his voice, the excitement in his words as he had suggested she try it on.

That day, he had been so enthusiastic about seeing her wear it, and now, as it lay gently in her palm, the weight of its significance pressed heavily on her heart. The thought of that moment was bittersweet, a memory of a happiness that had been cruelly snatched away.

Her gaze shifted to the letters, their edges crisp and untouched by time's passage. With trembling hands, she untied the red ribbon and unfolded the first letter, its paper creasing softly under her touch.

The first letter began with Sunghoon's elegant handwriting, the words leaping off the page like a familiar voice in her head.

"My dearest Eunha," he had written. "I hope this letter finds you well, though I wish I could deliver these words in person."

"Remember the first day of the school session," the letter read. "I went to the notice board just to see my name on the Class A list. I was so happy because I knew it meant I would be able to see you. Spending time with you in class, sharing even just moments of laughter or conversation, became the highlight of my days."

"The truth is," Sunghoon wrote, "I have been studying so hard because I wanted to be in your class. It may seem strange to you, but I have known you even before this year. I have been observing you, admiring your strength and resilience since middle school."

"I know the timing for this confession may be off," Sunghoon continued, "and I am unsure if I will ever be able to confess these feelings face-to-face. That's why I decided to pour my thoughts into these letters, hoping that they will reach you and convey everything I am too afraid to say aloud."

"Consider these letters a desperate attempt to express my feelings, a confession born from the depths of my heart," he had concluded. His words carried a mix of vulnerability and intensity, each line etched with the weight of his unspoken emotions.

As Eunha continued reading, her eyes welled up with tears. The realization hit her like a wave - he had harbored feelings for her, and he reciprocated her affection even before she found herself caring for him. It was a bittersweet revelation, filled with both joy and pain. She was touched that he had been observing her, admiring her strength, from the sidelines - even since middle school.

The room seemed to fade away as she imagined all the moments they had shared, now framed in a new light. Each interaction took on a different meaning, every gesture and word tinged with a deeper significance. She wished she could turn back time, to respond to his feelings with her own, but the past remained out of reach, leaving her with only these letters and the memories they held.

"When you entered the classroom that first day," the letter recounted, "I could hardly contain my happiness. After years of being in separate classes, here you were, right in front of me. It felt like a dream come true.

My heart was filled with joy, knowing I would get to spend every day sharing the same space, breathing the same air, and stealing glances at you during class."

"Fate was truly on my side that day," Sunghoon wrote. "The teacher, almost unknowingly, assigned you the seat right next to mine. It was as if the universe was conspiring to bring us closer together. Every single day, I would wake up excited, knowing that I would get to sit next to you, bask in your presence, and steal glances without anyone noticing."

"I know I might sound pathetic writing this," he confessed, "But I couldn't help myself. As I write these words, my heart is pounding with excitement and fear. Fear that you might reject me, think me crazy for having harbored these feelings for you. This letter is the only way I can confess the depth of my emotions without being ridiculed or rebuffed.

Please, just bear with me, and read on."

"For years, I have tried to keep my feelings hidden, but they have grown stronger with each passing day. It's as if every little thing you do - a smile, a gesture, a laugh - intensifies the butterflies in my stomach. I find myself watching you, trying to capture the moments between the words and the silence, as if each moment holds the key to understanding what goes on inside your mind."

He wrote, "Remember the day of our first hang out at the mall? I was so nervous, my heart racing like it might burst from my chest. Then you walked in, wearing a cute sun dress. The way the sunlight hit your skin, the way the dress hugged your figure - it took my breath away. I couldn't find the words to express how beautiful you looked."

He continued, "I wanted to tell you then and there, but I was too afraid. I didn't want to ruin the moment with my confessions. Instead, I just kept stealing glances at you, marveling at how radiant you looked in that dress. I was a blushing mess, trying to hide my nervousness with awkward laughs and fumbled words."

He wrote, "That necklace I mentioned earlier, the one I was so enthusiastic about? It was for you. I wanted to buy it that day, when we hanged out at the mall, but I guess I got a little flustered and decided to wait. I guess I was too nervous about how you'd react, if it would be too much, too soon. But please know that it was meant as a gift for you, a small token of my affection Eunha."

He continued, "Looking back, I regret not giving it to you that day. It was a perfect opportunity, but I let my own fears get in the way. I was afraid the moment wasn't right, that you might think it was too much. But now, as I write this, I wish I had taken that chance. The memories of that day are so precious to me, and the thought of adding another layer to it with the necklace makes my heart ache with longing."

He wrote, "Do you still remember the day we met in the hallway, me with my group of friends? I don't think I'll ever forget how my heart jumped when I saw you. You were standing there, surrounded by the noise of the hallway, but I couldn't hear anything but the sound of my own heartbeat racing. It was that moment, when our gazes locked, that I knew I was hopelessly smitten with you."

He admitted, "I must admit, my friends were teasing me nonstop after that. They knew how I had a crush on you, and seeing you walk up to me in the hallway only fueled their amusement. They kept ribbing me, asking if I had a chance, if I was going to ask you out. I tried to brush it off, play it cool, but inside, my heart was pounding like a drum."

"The way you spoke so naturally to me," he continued, "the casual greeting, it made me feel like the world had stopped for a moment. I wished we could stay in that moment forever, just talking and laughing, without the teasing and the expectations of the real world. But alas, reality caught up with us, and you walked away down the hallway, leaving me standing there, filled with a mix of elation and longing."

"I watched you walk away, your figure disappearing around the corner, and all I could think was, 'Did that really just happen?' It was like a dream, a moment snatched out of time, leaving me both confused and elated. The sound of my friends' laughter faded into the background, replaced by the sound of my own thoughts, swirling with wonder and uncertainty."