Babysitting is a Death Sentence

It all started with one simple request.

Kai had one job—watch his son, Hani, for a few hours while his wife was out. Easy, right?

Wrong.

Because Crimson found out.

The Call of Doom

Kai was peacefully sitting on the couch, watching Hani play with his toys, when his phone buzzed violently.

Crimson (Idiot #1): "I HEARD YOU'RE BABYSITTING. I'M COMING OVER."

Kai immediately replied, "NO."

Crimson replied with a selfie of him already at the door.

Kai sighed.

The Arrival of Chaos

The door burst open, revealing not just Crimson but Kazuki, MJ, and Leon.

Kai's eye twitched. "I said no."

Crimson grinned. "We heard 'yes.'"

MJ crossed his arms. "You're just mad because you suck at babysitting."

Kazuki nodded. "We're here to help."

"None of you should be allowed near children."

Kazuki gasped. "How dare you."

Crimson clapped his hands. "Alright, kids, we're in charge now! What do you wanna do?"

Hani and his friends cheered.

Kai's soul left his body.

Interrogating the Stuffed Animals

Somehow, in less than ten minutes, Crimson had convinced the kids to play 'interrogation.'

A teddy bear was tied to a chair.

Crimson slammed his hands on the table. "WHERE WERE YOU ON THE NIGHT OF THE ROBBERY?!"

The kids giggled.

One of Hani's friends pointed at the bear. "He's not talking!"

Crimson nodded seriously. "Looks like we have to use… THE TICKLE TORTURE."

The kids pounced on the teddy bear.

Kai buried his face in his hands. "Why am I still alive."

Kazuki's Tree Incident

Kazuki decided he would be the cool uncle.

So he climbed a tree to show off.

And then. He got stuck.

MJ looked up. "How did this happen?"

Kazuki clung to the branch. "I wanted to impress the kids, but now I can't get down."

Hani yelled, "JUMP!"

Kazuki shook his head. "What if I die?"

Crimson: "I mean, that's a win-win situation."

Kazuki: "Bro."

MJ vs. The Five-Year-Old Chess Master

MJ sat at the table, staring at the chessboard.

Across from him, a five-year-old girl adjusted her glasses. "Your move."

MJ wiped his sweat.

Crimson whispered, "Bro, she's destroying you."

MJ moved his piece. The girl immediately checkmated him.

Silence.

MJ stood up and walked out.

Leon found him outside, staring at the sky.

"…You good?"

MJ whispered, "I have no purpose anymore."

The Explosion (Because Of Course There's An Explosion)

Everything was actually calming down.

Until Crimson said, "Let's cook!"

Kai's eyes went wide. "NO—"

But it was too late.

• Crimson tried to microwave a fork.

• Kazuki set the toaster on fire.

• Leon turned on the blender without the lid.

• MJ was still emotionally recovering from chess.

Boom.

A small explosion shook the kitchen. Smoke filled the air.

Kai stood in the wreckage, shaking. "I am going to commit several crimes."

Crimson, covered in soot, gave him a thumbs-up. "Good news. The spaghetti is done."

Nami Comes Home

Just as Kai was about to lose his mind, the front door opened.

Nami stepped inside.

She blinked. "Oh my."

The house was wrecked.

Hani and his friends were laughing.

MJ was still staring at the sky.

Kazuki was hanging from the tree.

The kitchen was covered in smoke.

And Crimson?

He pointed at Kai. "HE DID IT."

Kai lunged at him.

Nami just smiled and kissed Kai's cheek. "I'm sure you did great, honey."

Kai sighed. "I hate all of you."

Crimson grinned. "Same time next week?"

Kai screamed.