My Sword Won’t Shut Up (And Might Be a Tsundere?)

After my glorious victory against an undead samurai and securing my shiny new sword, I thought I'd finally get a moment to relax. But of course, life—or whatever cosmic force runs this weird world—had other plans. 

DING!

A bright screen suddenly popped up in front of me out of nowhere, nearly making me drop my new blade into the pond. I squinted at it, and before I could even process what was happening, a soft yet very professional-sounding female voice chimed in. 

"Congratulations! You have gained the Samurai's Sword, Ragnok." 

"Ooooh," I said, nodding. "Sounds fancy. Wonder if it comes with a user manual." 

The screen displayed a picture of the sword, showing its sleek, deadly design with an added touch of ominous energy swirling around it. Nice. 

"Elemental blade from Zagous." 

A chibi version of the undead samurai I just defeated appeared on-screen, flexing his tiny ghost muscles. I blinked. "Huh. Cute." 

"Skill learned: Swordsmanship!" 

"Extra skill: Mastery Sword 3!" 

"Skill learned: Poker Face."

Wait, what? "Poker face?" I muttered. "Is this supposed to help me in battle or during awkward social situations?" 

"Extra skill: Ability Diffuse." 

The screen showed an image of me standing in front of an explosion, arms crossed, sunglasses on, totally unfazed. "Yup, totally my vibe," I said proudly. 

Finally, the screen asked: 

"Which one would you like to pick? 1 or 2?" 

"Uh... I dunno," I mumbled. "What's the difference?" 

The screen didn't respond, of course. It just blinked expectantly. Not wanting to seem indecisive (even though I totally was), I randomly tapped 1. 

"Choice accepted!"

Suddenly, I felt a surge of energy through my body, and my hair did this weird thing where it briefly stood on end like I was in a shampoo commercial. "Whoa," I muttered. "If only I had this skill during high school exams..." 

And then, because I couldn't resist, I smirked and muttered, "Poker face, huh? Well, that'll be handy if I ever play strip poker." I chuckled to myself. 

Out of nowhere, a voice spoke up. 

"Hah! That's a good one!" 

I nearly dropped the sword. Floating in front of me was none other than the samurai himself—or at least his soul. He looked way less spooky now, just a regular (albeit ghostly) dude with long, brownish hair tied back, a few faint battle scars, and a face that honestly was... kind of cute? Not in a weird way, but cute for a samurai. 

"Hey there," he said with a grin. "Name's Zagous. Well, it was before I died. Now I'm just a soul with nothing better to do." He shrugged. "Gotta say, I'm glad you got my sword. Feels like I ended up in good hands." 

I swung the sword around a little. "Yeah, feels pretty solid," I said, nodding. "What's it made of? Ghost-grade steel?" 

Zagous snorted. "Ghost-grade steel? Ha! No, no, it's infused with elemental energy from the depths of—" 

I held up a hand. "Yeah, yeah, cool origin story and all. More importantly, does it have a self-cleaning feature?" 

We both laughed, and to my surprise, the guy actually had a sense of humor. Then, in true samurai spirit, he gave me a once-over and teased, "You know, for a guy who wields a legendary sword, you sure look... soft." 

I squinted. "Soft?" 

He nodded with a grin. "Yeah, like, if you had to wear a gown, you'd probably be the most beautiful woman in this world." 

I gasped dramatically. "How dare you, sir?! I am a manly man!" 

Zagous winked. "Sure, sure, whatever you say... princess." 

I groaned. "I hate you already." 

"But you love the sword," he smirked. 

I sighed, looking down at Ragnok. "Okay, fair point. It's a nice sword." 

Zagous crossed his ghostly arms. "See? I knew we'd get along." 

As I admired the sword under the moonlight, a faint glow suddenly started radiating from it—and from me. My hair shimmered with blue and red hues, sparkling in the night like some kind of anime protagonist. I blinked, watching the light dance around me. "Whoa... am I glowing? This is kinda cool, but also... a bit much." 

Zagous smirked. "It's just a little soul-binding side effect. You'll get used to it." 

I gave him a sideways glance. "You could've mentioned that before I started glowing like a festival lantern." 

He chuckled. "Where's the fun in that?" 

I held up the sword, gazing at the way the moonlight reflected off its blade. Despite the banter, something deep inside told me this was going to be something special. Maybe even legendary. I gripped the hilt tightly and whispered, "I promise, dude... I'll take care of you." 

Zagous smiled softly and began to glow. "I know you will. See ya around, Nazuki." With that, his spirit slowly faded into the sword, and the glow settled down. 

I sighed, feeling a little... sentimental? Nah, couldn't be. I shook my head and muttered, "Alright, enough of the emotional stuff. Time to find something else to mess around with." 

But as I took one last look at the glowing sword, I couldn't help but grin. Maybe this new life wouldn't be so bad after all. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

After trekking for a bit, I stumbled upon a cave. Perfect. "Let's stay here for the night," I said. 

"Hey there. I am your new friend, your blade. I am the only one."  

I froze. "The hell?" I stared at the sword, half-expecting a face to pop out of the blade. 

"I SAID, I am your new friend!" 

I smirked. "Oh great, my sword thinks it's an anime protagonist. What's next, a tragic backstory?" 

"H-Hey! Don't make fun of my introduction, you disrespectful brat!" 

I raised an eyebrow. "Oh, did I hurt your feelings, Mr. All-Powerful Sword?" 

Suddenly, the sword emitted a weird hissing sound, and—wait, was it sweating? 

I burst out laughing. "Wow, you're nervous? I thought magic swords were supposed to be fearless!" 

"Shut up! It's my first time talking, okay?!" 

"Alright, alright. Let's start over. I'm Nazuki Garon. Call me Ron. Or Hansi. Old dude." 

"OLD DUDE?! HOW DARE YOU, YOU SHITTY-HEADED DUMBASSESSED HANSI!"

I nearly dropped the sword from laughing so hard. 

I then stabbed the sword into my torso—relax, it's just my soul realm ability. With a flick of magic, I pulled it back out as a tiny pendant, then a ring. 

"W-WHAT WAS THAT?! YOU TURNED ME INTO A RING?! AND NOW I'M... TINY?!" 

I grabbed his tiny form by the collar. "Admit it, you like it." 

"PUT ME DOWN!"

I chuckled and set him back on my shoulder. "Not satisfied?" 

"You're weird, man."

I smirked. "You have no idea." 

And with that, I lay back, ready to sleep. Tomorrow, the real adventure would begin.