Decision

Nicole's pov~

"I did not ask for this power."

"And yet you have it." She said, her tone unwavering.

"I do not want to. I do not want to abandon my life for anything."

"You do not even know what it is that we require of you, child."

I looked into her eyes, it hurt. This creature had taken the form of my mother, the one person I had been chasing after my whole life and she was here, saying all these horrible things to me.

No mother would tell her beloved daughter to sacrifice herself for others. At least, I would not.

"From the way things are going, I'm guessing you want me to do something for the betterment of everyone, even if I lose myself in the process."

"Do you want a repeat of the cave incident? What if Trish is chosen next year?"

I flinched. I had not thought of the possibility, I just wanted to abandon everything and run away. But I still did not want to bind myself to the role they all wanted me to play.

"The world is corrupt and I know I am not in a position to ask this of you, not after what I did but I believe you can be better than me. You can overcome the urge. I believe you because you are your father's daughter."

You are your father's daughter. A phrase my mom loved to use, a phrase I always associated with her.

This figure standing in front of me could not be my mother, she could not be a god. Everything I had heard me seen could not be true. My mother was a peaceful person, a gentle woman, someone who would never hurt a fly. She was an angel, a matriarch.

She was definitely not a god who made deals with men and continued to let women be sent to their deaths. I refused to believe my mother was that kind of person.

"I am that kind of creature." Her voice was firm and serious.

"How did you…?" I was stunned, I had not said my thoughts aloud but she knew what I was thinking.

"You really think you could hide your thoughts from me? You're in my realm, there's nothing hidden from me here."

"Are you really my mom?" I asked, I did not want to believe it. It was unreal, it was supposed to be the ramblings of an old man, she was not supposed to be a god, she was just supposed to stay as my mom.

Now, I was going to doubt everything.

"Yeah," she avoided my eyes, "your memories can not be altered anymore because you have awakened your powers so I hope you will forgive me for how different I seem."

Different?

Was this supposed to be different? She was unrecognizable, like a completely differe person. But at least she had given me rhe confirmation that all my memories were false. Every memory I had with my beloved mother was a lie, an ilkusio, someth she had cooked up.

I clenched my fists to stop myself from punching her, "what was the point? What was the point of twisting my memories? To have all those lovely moments, all those cherished moments when none of them were real? Why did you do it?"

She shrugged, "it was easier than doing it myself. I mean, you were not showing signs of unlocking powers so I thought you were human like your father."

"Do you love dad? Is his love for you real or a situation you created?"

She smiled but it was not the warm smile that was embedded in my memories, this smile was empty, as if she was humoring me.

"Love is a human thing. Your father was a challenge that was solved way too easily." She laughed, "all it took was a bit of innocent look and some mind games and I had him in my grasp. He was useful and I made him happy. That should have been enough."

Enough? Enough? I snapped.

My body moved before I could think, I lunged at her with my fists clenched, ready to wipe that coke, condensing look off her face. But the moment got a few steps away from her, my face found the floor.

An invisible force had slammed me into the ground, hard. As I lay there, gasping, my body refused to move, I heard a dry chuckle that came from her direction, the person I called my mother.

"That temper of yours will be a problem," she mused. "But…. I suppose you will learn… eventually."

I wanted to scream, I wanted to fight, I wanted to try to use my powers. Maybe freeze her to death like I had done to the men in the cave but I could not move.

"What a violent child you are." She chuckled dryly, her tone was as if she was talking to a child.

"How can you?" My voice was coarse from the impact of the invisible wall, forcing me to the ground, "how can you say something like that? Do you know how miserable he was when you left?"

I saw her tilt her head, her expression was confusion, as if she truly did not understand why I was angry. "You are thinking too much like a human. I imagined you awakening your powers would have fixed that but it had been days. This will be a problem."

Problem….

This was not my mother. I did not care if she admitted that my memories had been altered, I did not need to know that truth. To me, my mother had left the island in line with the goddess's will. I was to go meet her as soon as I get chosen. My mother was someone who always held me, whispered reassurances into my hair whenever I was scared, the woman who had so lovingly kissed my forehead every night.

That person never existed. These situations never happened. I never got love from my mother and the goddess never called on women. Everything was a lie.

"I hate you." I whispered.

"That does not matter to me."

"What is it you want?" I asked her and she smiled.

"Easy. I want you to channel your rage. The rage you felt when you saw those women die. I want you use it and overturn this world that those assholes love so much. I want you to destroy the current system."

"Why do you want that?" I was confused, the village chief had said this same woman had asked him not to make me a chosen which meant she did not want me to know the secrets of the world but now this, I was confused. She was not making sense.

Her tone at the beginning of our meeting in the void was also not coinciding with what she was saying at the moment. It was like she was contradicting herself, either that or I still did not have enough information to understand her fully.

She did not respond. She only released whatever force was holding me down.

"So it is decided, you will go back to the village chief and learn more. Do not return his memories back to him."

She suddenly crouched down, held my chin and drew my face close to hers.

"His memories are an investment for me. You will not return it. Is that understood?" Her eyes were glowing and her face cold, "if by chance he gets his memories back and you had something to do with it, I will personally kill you with my own two hands."

I nodded my head swiftly. It was clearly obvious that she meant every word, I did not want to dare her, after all, I was powerless against her. But then again, I could choose to ignore her and run away.

"If you run away, I will equally kill you." She smilled.

Drat.

I had forgotten abou her mind reading abilities.

"I cannot read minds, child. But your soul is in my realm right now and here, nothing is hidden to me."

She left my chin and stood up.

I had lost my mother, or rather, I never had her and I was simply just realizing it. I did not know the right reaction to give. I was trapped. The freedom I was about to have a grasp of had just escaped me, my own birth giver had snuffed out the flame of freedom and trapped me even deeper.

I had a slight idea what they wanted from me but I did not want to know anything else, no more secrets. I just wanted to be me.

With a snap of her hands, I jolted awake in my father's room. Trish was crouched down beside me, her face relieved as I opened my eyes.

She hugged me, tears falling from her face freely as she went on about how she thought I had died because I was not breathing but he voice was drowned out by my own thoughts.

There my father was, breaking down because of the love he had for my mother and to her, he was simply a challenge.

How ironic.