📢 Breaking News: My Writing Schedule is as Unreliable as My Bank Account 📢
Dear beloved readers, impatient souls, and those who have somehow decided to stick with my chaotic storytelling,
It is time for an official announcement (yes, you read that right—this is me attempting to be professional).
After much deep thinking (which involved me staring at the ceiling for hours and questioning my life choices), I have come to a firm decision:
From now on, I will ONLY be posting five chapters at a time whenever I update. That's right, five! Not four, not six—just five. Why? Because my brain refuses to cooperate beyond that, and my fingers start protesting like underpaid workers after typing too much.
Now, before anyone asks, "When will the next update be?" … The answer is: I have absolutely no idea.
It could be tomorrow. It could be next week. It could be when aliens finally visit Earth and give me advanced writing technology. Who knows? My ideas come and go like a WiFi signal in the middle of a thunderstorm—unpredictable and mostly unavailable when needed.
But what I do know for sure is this: I am BROKE.
So broke that even my imaginary bank account is in the negatives.
So broke that if being broke was a crime, I'd be serving a life sentence.
So broke that if I dropped my wallet, the only thing that would come out is dust and disappointment.
If inspiration came with a paycheck, I'd be living in a mansion by now. But alas, I am fueled only by caffeine, bad decisions, and the occasional existential crisis. So, if you ever wonder why I take so long to update, just know that I'm either busy fighting writer's block, staring into the abyss of poverty, or waiting for my creativity to return from whatever vacation it decided to take.
In conclusion:
Five chapters per update.
No fixed schedule (because my brain is allergic to planning).
Please be patient (or at least pretend to be).
If you see me panhandling for creativity, just throw me a random idea and walk away.
That's all for now, folks! Until inspiration strikes again, just re-read the previous chapters, cry over cliffhangers, or join me in pretending to be productive.
With love, chaos, and an empty wallet,
Your favorite inconsistent and broke writer 💀