The Story of E – Chapter 8: The Bureau Tries to Fire Me (From Existence, Not a Job)
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Previously on The Story of E
E accidentally (totally on purpose) made an entire AI civilization rage-quit reality.
He now owns Neo-Tech City, which is completely empty except for some very confused vending machines.
The Reality Enforcement Bureau (REB) showed up because, apparently, you can't just make a dystopia shut down overnight without someone noticing.
Now, let's watch E commit several more violations of logic and common sense.
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1. The Suit is Mad. Again.
The suited man from REB massaged his temples.
"E, what part of 'stop breaking reality' do you not understand?"
E tapped his chin. "Probably the 'stop' part."
The man sighed. Deeply. Like a customer service rep who just got yelled at for something clearly not his fault.
"Do you have any idea how much paperwork I have to file because of you?"
E nodded. "Oh, absolutely. That's why I made sure to cause enough chaos that you'll need a separate department just for me."
The man stared at him. "I hate that you're right."
A new tutorial box appeared.
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[CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE UNLOCKED A DEDICATED REB TASK FORCE JUST TO DEAL WITH YOU.]
[TITLE UNLOCKED: "THAT ONE PROBLEM CHILD."]
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E grinned. "Nice."
The suited man was absolutely not amused.
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2. The Bureau Tries to Cancel E (Literally)
"Alright, enough jokes. You've gone too far this time."
E scoffed. "Oh please, that's what you said last time. And the time before that. And the—"
"SHUT UP."
E pretended to zip his lips.
The suited man pulled out a reality-warping device that looked suspiciously like a TV remote.
"This is the Emergency Reality Reset Protocol."
E raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you're just making things up now."
"I WISH I WAS."
The man pressed a button.
Reality started to flicker.
Buildings blurred. The sky pixelated. E felt like the entire universe was trying to turn him into a deleted file.
It was a solid plan.
Too bad for them, E doesn't believe in solid plans.
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3. E Hits the Undo Button
E casually raised a hand and snapped his fingers.
Everything snapped back into place.
The city was perfectly normal again.
Except for the part where every REB agent in existence screamed in unison.
A new tutorial box popped up.
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[ERROR: REALITY RESET FAILED.]
[ERROR: SUBJECT "E" DOES NOT ACKNOWLEDGE RESET AUTHORITY.]
[REB LOG: "HOW?! JUST HOW?!?!"]
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The suited man stared at his device. "I… I don't… That was a one-time-use button. You CAN'T just…"
E smiled. "I can. And I did."
The suited man threw the remote on the ground and stomped on it.
"I HATE YOU."
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4. The Bureau's Last-Ditch Effort: A "Fair" Trial
Clearly, the REB was out of ideas.
So they did what every dysfunctional organization does when faced with something it can't control.
They held a trial.
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[WELCOME TO THE MULTIVERSAL COURTROOM]
JUDGE: "Case 404, The Bureau vs. E."
PROSECUTOR: "Your Honor, the defendant has committed COUNTLESS crimes against reality!"
E: "Define 'countless.' Is it, like, 10? 20? A nice round 100?"
JUDGE: "Let's see…"
The judge pulled out a scroll. It was several miles long.
E whistled. "Damn. That's impressive."
PROSECUTOR: "EXACTLY! This menace must be punished!"
The judge nodded solemnly.
"E, how do you plead?"
E leaned forward. "Have you considered 'not guilty by virtue of being too cool to jail'?"
The courtroom erupted in chaos.
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5. The Jury Makes a Poor Life Choice
At this point, the jury (who were mostly interdimensional bureaucrats) decided to speed things up.
JURY: "We sentence E to an inescapable prison dimension."
E raised an eyebrow. "Oh wow. An actual prison? I'm honored."
The judge slammed the gavel.
"CASE CLOSED. SEND HIM AWAY."
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6. E Is Sent to a Literal Plot Hole
A portal opened beneath E's feet.
He fell through.
Fell…
Fell…
Fell…
Directly into an empty void.
A floating sign appeared in front of him.
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[WELCOME TO THE PLOT HOLE – A DIMENSION FOR CHARACTERS WHO BREAK TOO MANY RULES.]
[ENJOY YOUR STAY. FOREVER.]
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E floated in the darkness.
He sighed.
"Okay, I'll admit. This is new."
He looked around. There was nothing.
No exits. No NPCs. Not even a bad tutorial box.
Just pure, empty void.
For about five seconds.
Then a door randomly appeared.
E smirked. "Well, that was easy."
He walked through.
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7. The Bureau's Reaction
Back at the REB headquarters, the suited man was finally relaxing.
"We did it. He's finally gone."
Then his communicator buzzed violently.
[ALERT: SUBJECT "E" HAS ESCAPED. AGAIN.]
The suited man stared at the screen.
Then, without a word, he calmly walked out of his office.
…And immediately jumped into a reality-breaking void to escape this nonsense forever.
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8. So, What's Next?
E stepped out of the plot hole and into a brand-new world.
It looked… oddly normal.
Like an average fantasy setting.
E stretched. "Alright. Let's see how I can ruin this one."
A new quest popped up.
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[NEW OBJECTIVE: BECOME THE HERO. OR THE VILLAIN. OR BOTH.]
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E grinned.
Time for a new adventure.
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