The Worst Negotiation Ever

Brassbeard's airship pulled alongside theirs.

A massive man with a mechanical arm, a flaming beard, and no sense of personal space jumped aboard.

"ARRR! WHO'S THE CAPTAIN OF THIS HERE STOLEN SHIP?!"

Finn, panicked, pointed at Zephyria.

Zephyria, glaring, immediately pointed at Tess.

Tess, unimpressed, pointed at Vespera.

Vespera, grinning, pointed at Finn.

Brassbeard grabbed Finn by the collar.

"AYE, SO YOU'RE THE THIEVIN' SCALLYWAG?!"

Finn, shaking: "I HAVE NEVER EVEN DRIVEN A SHIP IN MY LIFE."

Brassbeard squinted. "Wait a sec… I know ye!"

Finn: "Please say no."

Brassbeard: "Yer the legendary runaway groom!"

Finn: "…Excuse me?"

Brassbeard grinned. "PRINCESS IGNIS' ONE TRUE LOVE!"

Finn screamed internally.

Brassbeard laughed. "Tell ye what! I'll let ye go… if ye introduce me to the princess!"

Finn: "OH FOR THE LOVE OF—"

Zephyria, whispering: "Honestly, we should just hand you over."

Tess: "Yeah, we can always steal another Finn."

Vespera: "Nah, I like this one. He screams funny."

Finn cried harder.