Chapter-363

Drunken Glue


Jay-Jay's POV


"Hello?" Dr. Claudia greeted me.
I didn't leave where I was standing. I stared at Kuya as if
he was training me.
"Sit down, kid," Tiger ordered.
I tried to turn around to approach the door but Tiger quickly
approached and blocked me. He forced a smile as if
he was apologizing because he had no choice.
I was startled by a sensitive hand on my shoulder. I
immediately looked at who it was and Kuya's serious face faced me.
"Sit down, Jay," he ordered and pulled me slightly.
Even though it was against my will, I followed him. I bit
my lower lip while bending down and staring at the floor. I sat down in front of the Doctor.
Even though I couldn't look at him, I knew he was pitiful for me.
My hands were resting on my thighs. They were shaking
so I clenched them to hide them and to control the
tears that were coming because of the weight of my feelings.
Why do I feel like I've been cheated on?
I can't fight back. I can't do anything. There's no way to get through.
There's no one to defend me from Kuya. I never thought
he would do this. I thought he understood how I felt so
he pushed me away.
I was annoyed with myself. I didn't want to do this, but I knew he would force
me and I couldn't think of any excuse. I couldn't even
resist what I wanted.
What should I do?
"Angelo, we really shouldn't be doing this," the Doctor said to Kuya.
"She managed to remember something from her past. What
if she tries again?" Kuya insisted.
"The child is scared."
"She's always afraid. But she has to do it."
I burst into tears. I can't help it because I can't
do anything else in my situation. I'm like a puppet being controlled by someone who's playing
with me. I'm choking.
After remembering what I did to Aries, I don't want
to remember anything else. What if what I did was worse?
What if I've hurt someone? Maybe I can't take it anymore. Maybe
I'll go completely crazy.
"I-I don't want to," I whispered, almost only heard by myself.
But I knew the Doctor heard me too. He held my hand
so I looked at him for a moment. He smiled at me as if
he was telling me to trust him.
How? He can't go against Kuya either?
"Angelo..." he called my cousin. "It would be better if you give
us space and silence."
Kuya Angelo stared at him, as if testing if he had any plans.
It was a good thing the Doctor knew what to do to make
my cousin believe. He didn't look away.
"This is part of the consultation," the doctor added and only then did
Kuya look away before pointing to the room where I slept.
Dr. Claudia held my hand and motioned me to enter the
room. I followed. Upon entering, I immediately noticed
Kuya following but the door quickly closed so he did nothing.
"Sit down," the Doctor gently ordered me while pointing to the
side of the bed.
I did so and he sat down next to me as if
we were friends in this room.
"We won't do what Angelo wants. Don't worry, I won't
orce you to remember." He smiled at me. "Just say what
you want to say."
I stared at him. I was planning to waste time by just keeping my mouth shut but for some reason I couldn't
understand, my tears
suddenly flowed and I started crying. He immediately hugged me. I didn't want to feel this way. "It's okay to
cry." But I'm not okay. How long will I be like this? I just want a normal life, even if it's just for now. I still want to
enjoy my high school life. Even if it's just for a moment. Even if it's just for this year. I want to be free from my
past. From the lies around me. From controlling me. I want to breathe without any problems. But why are you
denying me that? Why? "I'm tired," He hugged me tighter. "I'm telling you this, not as a Doctor but as a friend
and someone you're going through." He took a deep breath. "It's normal to feel tired especially when nothing
changes in what you're doing. It's normal to feel that when the same thing happens over and over again.
That's normal. You have the right to feel that." I broke away from him and faced him. "It's hard to continue
without knowing what I'm facing. It's tiring. I'm okay with not remembering my past, why do you have to come
back to me?" He wiped my tears. "It feels good that you don't remember the pain of the past but how can you
learn from it." I don't understand. What should I learn from what happened to me? From what I did to Aries?
From that horrible memory? All I felt was guilt and now I have to do is avoid it all the time because I don't want
to hurt anyone. What else can I not remember? What can I teach you. He seemed to get my thoughts. He
smiled at me and arranged a few stray strands of hair from my face. "You're too young to experience these
things. But because life doesn't just make us suffer. We are meant to be hurt not only to feel pain but also to
learn from it." I shook my head. It seemed like I was struggling even more with what he wanted to convey. "You
don't understand." "And you? Do you completely understand yourself?" His question felt like a slap to me. My
response was silence. Do I really understand myself? I admit that I don't understand either. All I know is that
I'm struggling. And the memories of my past are what's making me suffer. All I want is for them to go away.
All the pain from that to go away. "You don't understand yourself because you admit you don't know what
you're facing. That's because you're trying to hide your past thinking it's better but it's not. Running away from
the problem has never been good." I know what he's doing. He's convincing me to do what Kuya wants. I
thought he was on my side but it seems like he and Kuya are just the same. They're just taking me down little
by little. "You can move forward from your past. But you can only do that if you can let go of your past. And
sometimes to let go you have to find the beginning of your bond. The end where it all began and that's where
you'll also know what you're really facing." Is that the only way? Is there no other way? Do I really have to go
back to everything? Do I really have to face what I'm avoiding? "I'm scared." I almost whispered but he still
heard me. "Fear is also what will continue to make you suffer." He held both my hands. "If you really can't do it,
it's okay but believe me, it will be harder for you especially as your memories gradually return. It's better if
you're prepared." I bit my lower lip hard but I couldn't stop crying . He hugged me again and this time I hugged
him too. There was something different about the way he caressed me. I felt like we were feeling the same
way. Psychiatrists are probably like this, making it seem like their patients are no different. But his actions
were deeper than being a Doctor and a patient. He was like a friend to me who I could always lean on even
though we had just had a sensible conversation. He didn't let go of me until he said I was okay. He helped me
fix myself. He also combed my hair. I suddenly felt like I had an older sibling. This is how having an older
sister feels. "Can I ask you a question?" "What's that?" "What's up with you and Ci-N Peralta?" I asked and I
heard her weak laughter. "He's your classmate, right?" I nodded weakly in response. "We're cousins." "I told
you. Are all Peraltas related to each other?" " I don't think so but you can quickly tell if a Peralta is part of the
amily. If they're in the medical field, they're automatically related to us. They're also in the same lineage," she
explained and I couldn't help but be amazed. Ci-N's entire clan is in the same field. I suddenly remembered
that she wanted to be a pilot. How could she do that when her entire lineage was saying that she should
ollow in their footsteps? "Isn't your profession any different?" I asked. Ci-N was taking a chance that she
wasn't alone in her family. We know that, right? "Yes, my Dad is. He became a businessman but things didn't
turn out well." she answered and I could feel the sadness in her voice. It seemed wrong of me to bring up such
a thing about their family. "Are you close to Ci-N?" I asked. He laughed a little. "Not too much but I'm happy
with him. He made his childhood worth it." I laughed a little too. I asked him one question after another about
Ci-N. He answered them all kindly. He once mentioned Batang Kumag's siblings but he quickly retracted them.
It seemed like he wasn't happy with them either. We talked for a few more hours. He also mentioned how he
and Kuya Angelo met. They became batchmates and Ma'am Cindy was his classmate. He didn't give many
details because it seemed like he was avoiding mentioning something. Our conversation was interrupted by
Kuya Angelo knocking on the door. He was forced to leave the room and leave me to rest. I took the
opportunity to get dressed. When I left the room, Dr. Claudia and Tiger had already said goodbye to me. They
said they had to leave. I followed them to the door but because I was angry with Kuya I thought about going
out too. My cousin just watched me thinking I was just taking the guests to the elevator and would be right
back. You're welcome. I waved to Dr. Claudia and Tiger before the elevator door closed completely. It was a bit
surprising that PPAP was actually there. He also looked serious, far from his silly smile when he was at
Kingsground. His demeanor still hadn't changed. I almost played the 'I have a pen... I have an apple' song. I
walked back when they were out of sight but I wasn't going to Kuya's unit. I was going to the King of Snakes'
unit. I hoped they had food. I rang the doorbell one after the other. I didn't know the password for the keypad
lock so I had to wait for them to open the door for me. It was a good thing I only waited a moment because it
opened and Keigan's face appeared before me with one of the glasses' lenses still cracked. What was it? He
was looking at me curiously as if waiting for me to say something. "H-Hi, can I see Keifer?" I asked and he
stared at me from head to toe. I was a little embarrassed because I was only wearing shorts and a t-shirt. I
was wearing a casual outfit. "He went out. To buy food," he replied. "You can wait for him inside if you want." I
nodded quickly. That's exactly what I'm going to do. I'm not going back to Kuya Angelo's unit. I'll let him wait or
look for something that's not there. Good luck with your search. You thought... He let me in and pointed to the
expensive sofa for me to sit on. Their unit was very different from Kuya's. I don't know if it was the design or
the placement of the appliances. The designs were dark. Unlike Kuya, who even though the color scheme was
all masculine, there was still life. I sat down while looking around. I noticed the glass and a little mess on the
table at their dining table. It looked like someone was eating while reading or tearing up paper. "Do you want
anything to drink?" he asked me. I couldn't answer yet but he had already walked to the kitchen. I didn't
complain because maybe he just wanted to give me something to drink while waiting for his sister. To be
honest, I couldn't help but be surprised by his behavior. It was so different from the way he treated me this
morning. I remembered the words he had said again . I suddenly became self-conscious because of that. I
watched him from where I was sitting. Could it be that his condition was really me. Keifer said our conditions
were similar. Could it be that we were the same? Could it be that he had also experienced something in his
past that he couldn't remember? Could it be that he also changes when he sees blood? What was the state of
the two of us? I immediately looked away when he suddenly turned to me. I didn't want him to think that I was
watching him. My ex was creepy. He finished in a moment. He came over to me and put the glass of juice in
ront of me before sitting on the sofa opposite me. "Brother might be on his way home. Have a drink first." I
nodded and thanked him. I looked at the juice for a moment because I seemed to notice something but I
quickly ignored it because the person who made it was looking at me. I didn't want him to think I was being
picky. Whatever it was, it was still there. I drank it and didn't notice anything except for the strange taste. I
knew I was drinking grape juice but there was something I couldn't explain. I only drank a little because of
that. "You don't like it?" he asked and there was a hint of sadness in his voice. I felt guilty because of that so I
immediately put the glass back in my mouth to finish the juice. Even though I wasn't sure about the taste
anymore, I finished it anyway just so his effort wouldn't be wasted. I burped a little when I finished the
contents of the glass. He smiled sweetly at me before standing up and saying goodbye to clearing the dining
table. I nodded to let him go. A few more minutes passed when I started to feel something strange in my
stomach. It was aching from the inside. I felt it well. I knew I wasn't hungry or having a bowel movement. Is it
bad to drink juice when there's no snack? A few more minutes and the ache got worse. I simply rubbed it in
the hope that the pain would go away. But with each passing minute, my stomach hurt more. I was also
starting to sweat. I looked over at Keigan for a moment but he had his back to me and it looked like he was
writing something. I voluntarily lay down on the sofa because of the pain. I was also getting soft and my
breathing was getting heavier. I also felt like I was going to vomit. There was something wrong with the pain in
my stomach that I was feeling. This wasn't ordinary. I need to go back to Kuya's unit. It would be embarrassing
if I were to collapse here because of the pain. Next time I'll just hide from Kuya Angelo. I tried to stand up but I
immediately sat down again because my stomach hurt even more . I was so weak that even a simple sitting
position was impossible. It was embarrassing but I felt like I had to ask for help. "K-Keigan," I called to Keifer's
brother. "Can you help me?" I didn't hear a response but I saw him walk closer to me. He was holding a
notebook with a few scraps of paper. "Can you please call my cousin? He's just in the other unit." He raised the
notebook and wrote. "The effect is faster when you put more," he said and wrote. Put it where? I accidentally
looked at the glass I was drinking from. My son... I'm telling you! That's why I seemed to be tasting something
different in that drink. "What... did you put it in?" I moaned weakly because of the pain in my stomach. "Glue,"
he answered casually. What? Do I look like paper that needs to be glued? I was using my two hands and arms
just to try to stop the pain in my stomach. The weak groans were gradually replaced by a weak scream. The
pain was getting worse and I couldn't stop myself from writhing. I wanted to be angry with him but I couldn't
even let out words because the pain was ahead of me. I wanted to throw up so much but nothing came out of
my throat. I didn't know who to ask for help. What would happen to me if I waited for my stomach pain to go
away. I had to help myself. I fell off the sofa. I couldn't stand up so I was forced to crawl. Before I could move
orward, I heard the door of a room open. I turned around and Keiren, crying, was the one who came to me. He
was also holding his stomach and he fell down less than three steps later . "Brother... My stomach hurts!" he
said crying. I looked at Keigan, risking helping his brother, but he just wrote on the paper again. "It only took
effect now," he said. His brother too? My eyes widened. What's wrong with him and even his own brother, he
made him drink glue? Does he have any plans for us? Keiren's crying got louder. I was overcome with worry.
Maybe his young body wouldn't be able to handle the pain. If I, who was older than him, was already weak,
how could he? "Brother!" he pleaded. Even though I was weak, I forced myself to crawl closer to him. I cried on
my own because with every move I made, the pain got worse. I felt like screaming but I needed to make sure
Keiren was okay. But because of his breathing, I couldn't even reach the tip of his finger. I could do nothing but
join in his crying. I silently prayed that someone would come to see how we were. Keifer, please come! I
literally couldn't move. Even my breathing was causing my stomach to hurt. I couldn't hear Keiren much
anymore, which I was more afraid of. If this went on for too long, something might happen to him. My fear
only lessened when I heard the door open and heard Keifer's voice. "What happened?" he asked in a panic. I
could see his confusion about who to approach first. I took the initiative to point to his brother because of my
worry. "Keiren...look at him," I ordered crying. He did so and I heard him call his brother's name. Like him, I
didn't hear an answer either. I hope he doesn't lose consciousness. Keifer picked up his brother and came to
me. "Hold on to me Jay. I'll take you to the hospital," he said, with a hint of fear and worry. I couldn't move
anymore but I didn't want to be a burden to him. Even if I wanted to stay, I knew he wouldn't let me. I gathered
up the remaining strength I had.I held onto him and forced myself to stand up. I cried after screaming in pain.
I followed his steps toward the door and out. He let go of me for a moment to open the door. My grip on him
was tight and getting tighter with each step we took. I didn't want to hold back and be a bother but I let go of
my own accord because of my weakness. Even if it was just a little strength. Keifer fell after me while holding
his brother. I could see his panic over which of us would help first. I started sobbing not because of pain but
because of anger. I couldn't do anything about our situation. I didn't want to be a burden. I didn't want to make
him suffer. He also had to carry his brother and I couldn't go along with him. "S-Sorry." I said crying. "No. No.
Don't apologize." he said and came closer to me before turning around. "I'll carry you." He took my hand and
orced me to get on his back.
I did my best to get on the elevator properly. He then
approached his brother to pick him up again. I held on even though I was already very weak
.
He managed to carry us all the way to the elevator. He
only let us down for a moment to rest. He also took out his cellphone
to dial a number but I couldn't hear what
he was saying properly. It was like he was calling an ambulance.
"Too long!" he shouted and I looked at
him for a moment.
"T-Try Keiren first," I whispered but he still heard.
"No. I won't prioritize or hold anyone back. I'll take you to the
hospital together."
The skin.
I envy him. To me,
his strength and determination are enviable. He will do anything for us. He won't choose
who he should take care of first.
If only I were strong enough to help him. If only there was something
I could do to ease his suffering. If
only I could offer help.
I heard the elevator bell ring. Keifer was about to let me carry him again
but the door opened and Kuya Angelo's crispy, cheap face
greeted me. He picked me up and took me out of the elevator.
It felt like my prayer had been answered.