The murder
Jay-Jay's POV
"I'm calm," I insisted to the pest King of Snakes. "No. You're not." My patience with this man was about to burst. I was calm but he insisted that my condition was not good just so that he wouldn't continue telling me what he found out. Later, I was no longer calm. "I'm calm," I said and simply took a deep breath. "You flinch," he replied. Oh, this is a bitch. My nostrils almost widened as I took a deep breath just to calm myself down. This man was wearing out my patience. "Oh, I guess, who wouldn't flinch-flinch at what you said about my mother?" I tried not to scream or let it be obvious in my voice that I was getting angry . "Why are your nostrils getting bigger?" You bitch! I raised both my hands to try to pinch myself because I was annoyed with this annoying pest. But because I knew he was watching me, I quickly thought of something else to do with my hands. It ended up clapping and I immediately followed it up with singing. "The birds, that fly. Loved by God, never fade..." He watched me in surprise. "You're deï¬nitely not okay." I blinked. I gave up. If he didn't want to believe that I was calm, then I had to force him to talk. Forced. My eyes narrowed at him. "You know, I'm just going home if you don't tell me everything you found out." "Jay . . ." "Then I'll tell Kuya that you hit him in the back of the head so he lost consciousness." I quickly reached for the door opening to get out but Keifer's hand was faster to stop me from reaching for it. He immediately grabbed both of my hands. Are you scared? "Oh why? Why?" I asked him. "Don't leave, we're not done talking yet." "Not yet done? You don't want to tell me the truth." I said annoyed. "You're just afraid of my cousin." "No, I'm not. He's not the one I'm worried about right now ." He replied arrogantly. Really? I smirked before trying to snatch my hands away. I glared at him. "It's a serious conversation, I'm really okay. I'm ready for whatever I can ï¬nd out." He held one of my hands. "I don't think you areâ€"." "Keifer!" I almost begged. I tried to pull my hand away but he tightened his grip. I was annoyed that we were just talking nonsense. I wanted to know the truth. Yes, it had also crossed my mind that I might not be able to handle it or be the cause of another problem but it would be harder if I just thought about the possibilities but I couldn't get an answer. It's tiring to overthink. Especially when I only have a small tool for thinking. "Okay. Okay. I'll tell you." He gave up. I could see the difficulty in his eyes. He let go of my hand. He took something from the passenger seat and I followed his gaze. It was a brown folder with a lot of papers tucked in. He looked at me again before opening the folder. "These are the copies of the documents related to the homicide or murder case," he said and pressed some papers to hand them to me. "According to the investigation, it was a homicide case. But there's someone interfering in the case that could be Rodrigo's amily. They say it was a murder case and they have witnesses. The problem is your mother won't talk." I looked at the papers he gave me. There was also Rodrigo's death certiï¬cate. Police report and something else that I didn't bother to read. It was dizzying to read. "Why won't you talk?" "There's no record of his statement about what happened." I thought. I know my Mom, it's impossible for her not to speak. She was so brave, if she knew she was wronged she wouldn't have let herself be beaten down like that. The police must have been scared of her mouth. "But why?" "Maybe she was in a state of shock before that she couldn't give any statement at all." I turned back the papers she gave me. I bowed before washing my face. It felt like something was wrong. "Keifer . . ." I called her and she fell silent to wait for my next words. "What's the reason, why did Mama kill her?" She sighed. "You . . . and your Mom . . . are victims of domestic violence. According to the report, she fought back to save you and her life." It was heavy on my chest to hear but I couldn't cry. Keifer and I had a conversation, when he saw that I was affected or showing symptoms, he wouldn't talk anymore and we also had to go to the Doctor. The stories of the people around me spontaneously came back to me. Neighbors, relatives and anyone who knew us. They knew that Mama was hurt but in the end they blamed her too. "It's her fault, why did she go with him?" I wanted to know, during the times when Mama or I were suffering from her husband's abuse, did anyone try to help us? Those people who were constantly slandering Mama in front of me, did they try to ï¬nd out about our situation? While they had time to gossip about us, did they also take the time to ask how we were during those times? I ï¬nd it hard to believe that Mama absorbed all the judgment after I added to it. Me . . . My face is thick. After she saved me, I was the only one who felt like saying bad things about her. My Mama. I remembered the times I waited for him to come or visit Grandma's house. Christmas, my birthday, her birthday or any occasion. He never showed up for me. It turned out he was in jail and was being paid for this case. It was true what I once heard Grandma and Aunt Jenny talking about at home. Mama was in jail. I don't understand why they had to hide it from me. Everyone knows that my Mom left me with Grandma. "C-Case is closed, right?" I asked. "It was but recently they're reopening the case. Just like I mentioned, someone is claiming the case must be murder and they say they have a witness," he replied and found a piece of paper and handed it to me. "There's also a statement here from someone else your Mother was with." I turned to him before reading the paper carefully. I looked at the name written on it. Two familiar names came to mind. My older brother had already mentioned their names to me. Jim Alcantara and Alex Ramos. I can't help but get annoyed by what they wrote. They're making it seem like my Mom really has a chance of becoming a murderer. They're saying that Mama also threatened them when they were still together. My grip on the paper tightened so it crumpled. "Jay?" Keifer called to me, bringing me back to my senses. For a moment, Kuya's words came back to me when I heard them talking to Tita Gema, as well as the ï¬rst time he took me to Dra Claudia. He wanted me to remember because Mama had a case. Is this the reason? Is this the case he was referring to? I handed the paper back to Hari. "No way, this is the reason Kuya wants me to remember?" "He wants you to what?" "G-G-G wants to send me to a psychiatrist so I can remember. I heard them talking about that before and when they also took me to the psychiatrist without telling me," I explained and Keifer's face seemed to darken. "No, no, he can't force you to do that. That's risky." He said angrily . I bowed my head. "But I think he's right." He put down the folder he was holding on the passenger seat and was about to open the car door to get out but I stopped him. "Where are you going?" I asked curiously while holding his arm tightly. "I will talk to your cousin. He can't force you to remember." He tried to open the door again but I stopped him again. Calm down! "Wait! Do you want to get into trouble again?" I asked annoyed. "Remember, they don't want to tell me what really happened. What if they ï¬nd out I asked you to look for this?" I pointed at the folder in the backseat. He looked annoyed by what I said. He took a deep breath to calm himself. I let go of him when I was sure he wouldn't try to get out again. We were both silent for a few minutes. He was deep in thought as if he was thinking about how to get my cousin back. While I was thinking about something else. Nice, we have a mind now. I'm confused, they don't want to tell me what happened but Kuya wants me to remember. Didn't they think that once I remember, I'll know what really happened. Aries may not want to surprise me but my cousin is against death. The fortune teller and the one who picks up the dead will ï¬ght. Who will win between them? Maybe Kuya because he's a powerhouse. You just think you know that you're going to be taken to the grave. But something is really wrong, it seems like something is missing. I tried to piece everything together. "Mama killed Rodrigo. He was imprisoned and released. Now the case is being reopened. They have a witness against Mama. Mama needs a witness to what happened so Kuya wants me to remember. But why does she need a witness? It was proven before that Mama was only defending herself and me. Can't they do that again now?" Keifer shook his head. "Remember when I mentioned that your mother didn't have a statement? They only used physical evidence and your hospital records, thanks to some of your neighbors who spoke up for you. That's not enough now because they are also my witnesses against you. They need strong evidence, a witness who is also inside the house." I was that witness. I softened. How can I be a witness if I don't remember anything? How can I give a statement if every time I remember my past , fear consumes me? How can I help Mama? I suddenly felt annoyed with myself. I felt like I couldn't do anything to help. I was so useless. "Keifer, do you think I should go to the Doctor?" I asked. "To ï¬nd out what's wrong with you? Yes, but if it's just to force yourself to remember, then it's a no." I bit my lower lip. But I needed to remember. How can I help Mama? Maybe one day the Police would come to pick her up and lock her up again. Maybe this time, he'll spend a longer time in prison or even be sentenced to life. I have something to do. "But . . . Because . . ." "Think Jay. What happens to you when you remember? What do you feel?" The fear, the feeling that I can't breathe and that someone is choking me, the eeling that I'm trapped and my movements are limited, like I'm tied up even though no one is holding me, it's hard to move and think, the feeling of not being able to ï¬ght, and most of all the feeling that I'm done. There are many more, but that's what always prevails over me. "What if you feel twice as much when everything suddenly comes back to you. Can you handle it?" he asked and I could see his concern. Can I handle it? I shook my head. "Maybe not." He held both of my hands. "We will ï¬gure it out. Don't force yourself. I know you're scared for your Mom, but we can ï¬nd a way. If we need to look for a new witness, we will." I really want to cry but I hold it back. I need to be strong and think clearly. Keifer is right, I shouldn't force myself to remember. We can ï¬nd another way to help my Mom. I nod at him and force a smile. "I'll trust what you said." He smiles and kisses one of my hands. It feels heavy that I can't think of a way for my Mom. All I can do now is wait. Waiting for the incident to come back to my mind or waiting to ï¬nd a new witness for Mom. Whichever comes ï¬rst, I hope it helps both of us. I hug Keifer, which surprises him. He hugs me back and kisses the side of my head. "To be honest, I'm ashamed of you," I whisper to him. "Why?" he asks laughing. "Because you're the one who bothers me with these things." "I'd rather you come to me. So I know you'll get the help you need." It felt so good. I smiled. He was always taking care of me. But I suddenly wondered, who was taking care of him? Who did he run to when he needed someone to lean on? It must have been me, but he'd never once said anything bad, except for the times when the three of us and Yuri got into trouble and I admitted my true eelings. I also noticed that he was the one who handled the Ulopong problems sometimes. He still managed to do that despite what he had to do with his siblings and what he had been through. I broke the hug and looked at him. "If I go to the psychiatrist, can you come with me?" He smiled sweetly. "Of course, I'll come with you." "Come and get checked out too." He laughed a little. "What?" I stared at him and showed that I was serious about what I was saying. He thought I was joking so he smiled but his smile gradually disappeared and was replaced by worry. "Jay? What are you thinking?" "Because after all, we have the same childhood. We both went through bad things. If I, who was brave, got sick, how could you?" I said and it seemed like he got what I wanted to convey. Don't worry, you're just being strong but you're not crazy. "I like that you are worried about my mental health." He bit his lower lip for a moment. "My apology for not telling you but I'm already seeing a psychiatrist and psychologist for myself." I blinked. It meant he was already seeing a Doctor. I blinked. "It means you're already seeing a Doctor." He nodded. "I didn't really tell you because I didn't want you to be pressured or think bad things. You're right to suspect ." He smiled at his last words. I felt like I wanted to punch him in the face. How could I have been the right suspect? This is ridiculous, the conversation was so ludicrous. "You're the right suspect!" I replied annoyed and he laughed. "Okay, not anymore." "What's not anymore? You're tripping me up again!" He pointed at me while still laughing. "There! There! Look! You're the right suspect again!" With that, I was fooling around again. I hit him but he immediately stopped me. "I'm just kidding." "I'm serious. When did you last visit a psychiatrist?" "After I left you, after I . . ." He was stunned and his expression changed. It was as if he suddenly regretted something. "A-After I hurt you." I was stunned too. Those were the times when I found out the truth about their plan and also about Aries. "I truly regret what I did back then. For me, having a childhood trauma is not an excuse for bad behavior." He smiled at me. " We are always my option. We always do.So after that I chose to change myself, of course I couldn't do that without professional help." I blinked. "What about me? It's like you already said that my behavior is really bad and what I went through has nothing to do with it," I said with a mix of annoyance. He laughed out loud. "You're right to suspect me again. Of course we're different, I can still control my actions, you can't. You don't remember anything you did, do you?" Of course, he was right. But I wasn't the right suspect. I don't know where he got the right suspicion from. I smiled slightly. It was funny because he was really serious about saying he would change. He actually went closer to the Doctor. "I'll still go with you if you want to go to the Psychiatrist." I nodded. "Maybe not now, but I'd rather go as soon as possible." "Please, no pressure." How can I say I'm already pressured? It's like I'm in a pressure cooker. I'm on the same level as a 45-Days old chicken but it's been over 45 days so it's already straining. There, I'm hungry. "How does it feel to talk to the Doctor? Is it scary?" He shook his head. "They're calm. More listening than talking." I remembered Doctor Claudia. I was mean to her the ï¬rst time we met. The second time we were pretty okay, we became She's more like my sister than a Doctor who wants to treat me. Is it the same with other Doctors? I plan to see other Doctors. It's not that I don't trust Doc Claudia, but she and Kuya are close. Maybe she'll tell me later what she ï¬nds out about me. My cousin thinks differently. She's super forward-thinking. I looked at my phone when it rang. Aries was calling, it looked like they were looking for me. "Why?" Keifer asked when he noticed I was just staring at my phone. "It looks like I'm looking for you. I need to go back." "Okay, but before that. Can I at least have one kiss?" It felt like something was tickling my gut. I didn't know if I was hungry or just excited. I looked at my phone for a moment before facing him again. I nodded and his smile widened. He came closer to me and I did the same to him. And of course we already know what happened next. Eme. The King of Cobras is a tricky one because one kiss was ollowed by another, and another, and another. He couldn't hold it in either and grabbed both of my cheeks. "Hey," I said to him. "What?" He asked innocently. Before I could complain again, he kissed me again. I couldn't help but laugh at him. He just let go of me and turned the steering wheel. He drove back to my place but like he always does, he didn't park in front of the house. I was about to say goodbye but his actions were so quick. He had both of his hands on both of my cheeks again and was kissing me. I couldn't help but laugh at what he was doing. He laughed too. I stared at him as he stopped and looked at me. How many times have I tried to tell him that I want to be with him? He always gets interrupted. Maybe I can say it now? He hasn't interrupted me yet so maybe there's still time. "Keifer . . ." I called to him. He smiled. "My future Mrs. Watson." I laughed a little. Jasper Jean Mariano Watson. Okay, it's not bad to hear. "I just thought, maybe it's okay . . ." I bit my lower lip for a moment before continuing to speak. "Beâ€"Oh, buffalo!" I screamed because of the sudden banging on the car window. I immediately turned around and Aries' face appeared before me. His eyebrows met. Shit! Intrusion! I faced Keifer and signaled him to get out of the car. He nodded and let me go. "Are you really meeting here? Go home!" Aries angrily ordered me as I got out of the car. Is his love life sad again? His temper is getting hot again. But it's okay that he's the one who saw me instead of Kuya Angelo. "And you!" He turned to Keifer. "Get lost!" He reluctantly closed the car door. He faced me and motioned for me to go home. I did so and occasionally looked back at Hari's car. A label that had become a stone. I'll just pass it on the text. It was ugly, after all, our being a couple should be formal. I was embarrassed to enter the house. I was stunned when I saw Mama. There was no trace of suffering or anything she had been through in her appearance. She seemed like a normal person doing normal things . I couldn't help but feel annoyed with myself while watching her. Idiot, don't cry.