chapter 86: the echo of lost time

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The morning came slowly, the dull light creeping in through the blinds, casting faint shadows across the room. Kaori sat on her bed, eyes hollow from sleeplessness, staring at the same spot on the wall where Kaito's photo used to hang. The photo, a moment frozen in time, was now gone. It had been packed away, tucked into a box where it couldn't hurt her—couldn't remind her of all that had been.

The emptiness of the room mirrored the emptiness she felt inside. A day had passed since Haruto left, and she hadn't moved. The world outside still buzzed with life, but Kaori's world remained paused, frozen in a state of grief. It wasn't even just the breakup—it was everything that had come after, the guilt, the doubts, the loneliness. She felt as though she had lost herself in the process.

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts, pulling her out of the haze. She didn't even need to look through the peephole to know who it was. Yumi, her ever-present friend, had come to check on her again. The same person who had been there through every tear, every angry word, every long silence.

She forced herself to stand, but her legs felt like lead. She opened the door, offering a weak smile. Yumi stood there, her face full of concern, her eyes searching Kaori's like she was looking for some sign of life.

"Kaori, how are you doing?" Yumi asked, her voice soft but insistent, as though she knew this question was the first step in bringing Kaori back.

Kaori didn't know how to answer. How could she explain the constant ache that seemed to gnaw at her heart? How could she put into words the emptiness she felt every moment Kaito wasn't there? "I'm... okay," she said, but even as the words left her mouth, she knew they were a lie.

Yumi didn't buy it. She stepped inside, closing the door behind her. "Kaori, I know you're not okay. You can talk to me, you know that, right?" She sat on the couch, pulling Kaori to sit beside her. The room felt too small for them both, the air thick with unspoken words.

Kaori swallowed hard, trying to find the strength to speak, but her voice faltered. "I don't know how to do this anymore, Yumi," she whispered. "I don't know how to live in a world where Kaito isn't by my side."

Yumi looked at her with a sadness Kaori hadn't seen before. It was one thing to see someone suffering from the outside, but it was different when you knew their heart was breaking and there was nothing you could do to fix it. Yumi reached out, gently taking Kaori's hand in her own, a silent promise of support.

"I know it feels like the world's falling apart right now," Yumi said quietly. "But you're stronger than you think. You've always been strong, Kaori."

Kaori shook her head, her tears finally falling. "It's not enough," she said, her voice breaking. "I thought I was strong enough, but I wasn't. I couldn't save him. And now everything is ruined."

The sobs that followed were heavy, wracking her body with their force. She couldn't stop them. Couldn't stop the flood of emotions that poured out of her as the weight of everything settled on her fragile shoulders. She had thought that love would be enough, that it could fix anything, but it hadn't been.

Yumi pulled her into a hug, holding her tightly as the tears soaked her shirt. "It's not your fault, Kaori. You couldn't have known. You didn't do anything wrong."

But Kaori couldn't believe her. She couldn't stop blaming herself. In her mind, the pieces of the puzzle were clear now, each one fitting into place. Every fight, every word left unsaid, every moment they could have worked harder to understand each other—it was all her fault.

And then, the words came rushing out, words she had buried deep inside for so long. "I didn't fight for him. I didn't fight for us. I just let it slip away, thinking I could fix everything later. But now it's too late."

Yumi pulled back, her hands cupping Kaori's face. "Kaori, listen to me. You did what you could. Relationships are never perfect. They take time, they take patience. You didn't fail him. And you didn't fail yourself."

Kaori looked into her friend's eyes, searching for the truth in those words, but the pain still echoed in her heart. "But it hurts so much. I don't know how to move forward. I feel like I've lost everything."

Yumi was quiet for a moment, and Kaori could see the wheels turning in her friend's mind, the careful calculation of what to say next. Finally, Yumi spoke again, her voice steady but firm. "It's okay to feel like this right now. You don't have to have all the answers. You don't have to know exactly what comes next. But you do need to take one step. One tiny step forward."

Kaori looked at her in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Yumi smiled gently, a look of warmth and understanding in her eyes. "Start small. Do something for yourself. Take care of you. And when you're ready, you'll find the strength to face the world again. It's not going to be easy. You won't forget Kaito, and that's okay. But you can learn to live with the pain. It won't always hurt like this."

Kaori looked down, the weight of Yumi's words sinking in. Could she really find the strength to live without Kaito? Could she learn to breathe again without him beside her?

Her heart told her no. But somewhere deep inside, a flicker of hope stirred.

"You're not alone, Kaori," Yumi added softly. "You never have been."

The truth of those words washed over Kaori, and for the first time in days, she felt a slight loosening in the tight grip of despair that had held her so firmly. Maybe she could take one small step. Maybe it wouldn't be so impossible after all.

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End of Chapter 86.