Chapter 5
"You know I was worried sick about you all night, driving around everywhere looking for you."
The man's brow was furrowed with anger, as if I had committed some unforgivable sin.
I had no intention of explaining anything to him, only saying in a hoarse voice, "Don't forget to sign the divorce papers."
Nolan stood up abruptly, like an enraged lion, and berated me, "I'm fucking done being nice to you, you know that?"
"You keep bringing up this divorce bullshit."
"Is that how badly you want to leave me?"
He took two steps forward, forcefully pulling me into his embrace.
The overwhelming scent of pine enveloped me.
It used to be my favorite smell.
Now it just turned my stomach.
My body felt like a limp rag doll, unable to muster any strength, and my head was spinning terribly.
But Nolan kept rambling on about something.
Just then, Serenity's voice pierced through.
I turned my head to see her wrapped only in a towel, cheeks flushed and eyes bashful, peeking out from Nolan's bedroom.
"Nolan, I'm ready."
The woman's voice was soft and sultry, with a hint of barely concealed desire.
Nolan's whole body tensed, and he looked at me in panic, immediately launching into an explanation."The guest room shower was broken, so I let Serenity use my room to take a bath."
Another wave of dizzying vertigo washed over me.
Still, I managed to push Nolan away forcefully.
"You don't need to explain anything to me."
Nolan froze, looking at me with disbelief.
"Sloane, do you really care so little about me?"
I looked at him, my eyes calm and steady.
"Yes."
He seemed to be fuming, his eyes dark and stormy, his chest heaving dramatically.
"Well, aren't you something!"
"I should have known. Someone like you who doesn't even care about their own flesh and blood."
"How could you possibly care about me!"
"Serves you right that you can't have children now!"
As soon as the words left his mouth, the room fell into a deafening silence.
Memories I had buried deep inside began to surface.
Nolan and I once had a child.
It was less than a year into our marriage, when Nolan was still attentive to my every need.
When we found out about the baby, he was even more excited than I was.
I, too, was looking forward to the arrival of our child.
Until one day, Nolan's mother brought me a bowl of medicinal soup.
She claimed it was to nourish my blood and boost my energy.
I didn't suspect anything and drank it all.Within five minutes, blood trickled down my leg like a small stream.
A searing pain gripped my abdomen, and I passed out from the agony.
When I came to, a nurse informed me that the baby was gone.
It turned out that Nolan's mother had fallen for an old wives' tale, believing that if I drank that concoction, I would give birth to a boy.
Instead, it caused a miscarriage.
Even my uterus was damaged, and I could never have a child of my own again.
Despite the heartache and loss, I feared that Nolan would become estranged from his mother because of this incident.
After much deliberation, I decided not to tell Nolan the truth.
Nolan, however, was convinced it was because I had eaten hot pot the day before. He flew into a rage and slept in separate rooms for a long time.
From that day on, I couldn't sleep well for entire nights.
Every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was my child who never made it into this world.
Tears streamed down my face, and I couldn't wipe them away fast enough.
Before, I loved Nolan, so I was willing to take the blame upon myself.
But now, I don't love him anymore.
I stepped forward, struggling to control my emotions as they threatened to explode.
I said to Nolan,
"Do you remember why your mom always avoided you after we lost the baby?"
"It's because she was the one responsible for losing our child."I pressed my lips together, my voice soft and small as if I were stating the most inconsequential thing in the world.
But for Nolan, it was as if the sky had fallen and the earth had crumbled beneath his feet.
He suddenly gripped both my shoulders, his voice trembling yet restrained.
"Sloane, what nonsense are you spouting!"