Chapter 20: So... maybe let's not?

A small inscription at the base of the pedestal read: "Heavenly Steamed Bun of Insight – Consume to receive a random boon (or possibly mild heartburn)."

He laughed. "Well, don't mind if I do." He hadn't had breakfast after all. Picking up the bun, which was warm and soft, he took a cautious bite. The flavor was divine – literally the best pork bun he'd ever had, juices savory and delightful. He quickly devoured it, half-expecting something magical to happen.

For a moment, nothing. He felt just full and happy. Then, abruptly, his vision blurred. He sat down, worried he'd been tricked into a poison, but then his mind exploded with a montage of vivid scenes:

He saw himself, as a child, learning to cook at his mother's knee, burning rice the first time and then perfecting it. He saw the night he accidentally invented his special fried rice recipe, the stars aligning as he tasted it and unknowingly absorbed a wisp of Heavenly energy that fell from the sky (Ah, so that was why his dish had celestial flavor!).

He saw the Celestial Banquet from outside his own body, as if a camera panned around, showing amused gods and jealous demons all savoring his dish. Then he saw a hazy image of the Jade Lotus at the mountaintop, glowing, with silhouettes of others around it—and curiously, a shadow of a person with a broom standing off to the side.

Finally, he heard a voice, soft and echoing: "Your path is unorthodox, but the simplest ingredient in any great journey is sincerity. Continue to stir the pot fate has given you."

Li Fan snapped back to reality, breathless. That was some bun! Insight indeed—though cryptic. Sincerity… stir the pot of fate? He shook his head to clear it. As he got up, he noticed on the ground where the bun had been, a small token remained: a bronze coin with an engraving of a smiling chef. Maybe a keepsake or proof of completing this mini-puzzle?

He pocketed it. Perhaps these tokens could be exchanged later for something, or they were just fun collectibles (Celestial gashapon prizes, who knows).

Stepping out of the chamber, he shielded his eyes against the daylight. And jumped back with a start: just outside, crouching and apparently waiting, was a creature about the size of a large dog but looking like a cross between a rabbit and a kangaroo, with antlers. A Jackalope Hare maybe? It stared at him with big eyes.

Had it been watching him the whole time? It sniffed and stood on hind legs, clearly smelling the remnants of the bun. "Sorry, pal," Li Fan said, "you're too late for breakfast." The creature pouted (truly, it looked like it pouted) and thumped its foot.

Li Fan, feeling magnanimous after the nice meal and insight, reached into his pack. He found a piece of flatbread. "Here, try this. Not as good as a Heavenly bun, but still tasty." He offered it. The jackalope sniffed, then happily took it and chewed.

While it munched, Li Fan gently patted its head between the antlers. It seemed friendly enough. "You wouldn't happen to know the best way up, would you?" he half-joked to the hare. It tilted its head, as if understanding, then bounded a few paces along a faint trail, looking back at him expectantly.

"Well I'll be," Li Fan murmured. He followed, and the hare continued, leading him along a route. Maybe it was coincidence or maybe the creatures here were just used to guiding lost cultivators or mooching food off them. Either way, Li Fan was grateful.

The jackalope hare guided him through a dense copse that he'd have struggled to navigate alone, and out onto a higher ridge. From here the peak was clearly visible, perhaps another day's climb away at mortal pace. The hare suddenly froze, ears twitching. Then, with a panicked squeak, it darted into a bush and vanished.

Li Fan's own danger senses tingled a second later. Voices—and approaching footsteps. He recognized one: Yun Zhong, a brash warrior from an earlier gathering, known for his explosive temper and explosive fire techniques. The other voice was softer, female, likely Yun Zhong's teammate.

"...saw that Zhao jerk heading further east, so we should avoid him. The mortal though—Zhao's bounty on him is tempting. 200 spirit stones for Li Fan's head, can you believe it?" Yun Zhong was saying.

Li Fan's blood ran cold. Bounty on his head?! Zhao must have been really embarrassed. And 200 spirit stones was no small sum, enough to motivate some contestants to go out of their way.

The female voice replied, "It's against the rules to kill, Yun. Are you seriously considering it?"

Yun Zhong laughed harshly. "Who said kill? We just need proof of elimination. Could rough him up, tie him to a tree until the trial ends, that counts. Or scare him into forfeiting, that'd do too."

Li Fan quietly backed up. Unfortunately, there was nowhere to go but backward along the ridge, which ended in a steep drop not far behind. If he tried to outrun, they'd see him for sure once he left cover.

He had to either hide or come up with a cunning plan. They were almost at the spot where the ridge trail opened—there was an outcropping here he was hiding behind. If they came around it, he'd be face to face.

His eyes darted. On the ground near him was a cluster of Heavenly Prickly Pear cacti. He recalled Yuechan's advice on some flora: these cacti had fruit that explodes into sticky goo when jostled. Perhaps he could craft a quick surprise.

Li Fan carefully picked two of the heavy purple prickly pears, mindful of the needles. He smeared a bit of boar broth residue from his wok onto them for good measure—he wasn't sure why, but maybe the smell would mask his scent or distract. Then he braced himself behind the rock.

As Yun Zhong's broad-shouldered form rounded the corner, Li Fan lobbed one prickly pear at the ground right in front of him. SPLORCH! The fruit exploded into a burst of gooey, sticky sap, splattering Yun Zhong's legs and midsection, effectively gluing him to the spot as the goo hardened on contact with air.

"What the—?!" Yun Zhong roared, trying to move but sticking fast like a bug on flypaper. The female partner behind him stopped in shock.

Li Fan stepped out with the second prickly pear raised threateningly in his wok like a slingshot. "Hi there!" he said with false cheer. "I'd rather not hurt anyone, but I also prefer not being tied to a tree, thank you. So... maybe let's not?"

The woman, a lithe sword cultivator named Fei, burst out laughing before she could stop herself. She quickly composed her face, but amusement still twinkled in her eyes. Yun Zhong looked furious and ridiculous, struggling in vain. "You— you mortal weasel! Release me and fight fair!"

Li Fan rolled his eyes. "Sure, I'll fight you fairly after you promised to rough me up and tie me up. Because that's totally fair." He shook his head. "Listen, you two. I have no quarrel with you. Zhao's pride isn't worth your trouble. Why not just go for the Lotus and forget about me?"

Fei lowered her sword slightly, considering. "He has a point, Yun. This is dishonorable, and frankly, more trouble than it's worth. We're here to advance our ranks, not do Zhao's dirty work."

"Shut up and help me!" Yun Zhong demanded, still trying to ignite a flame in his palm to melt the goo. But the sap seemed to also dampen spiritual energy – his flame sputtered weakly, causing no more than a wisp of smoke.

Li Fan raised his brows. "Yun, your partner seems sensible. Maybe listen to her? I'd hate to throw this second fruit. It's really sticky stuff."

Fei actually sheathed her sword, a sign she wasn't going to attack. She sighed. "Mortal Li Fan, I apologize for Yun's behavior. I... owe Zhao a favor, which is why I even humored this chase. But I won't continue. It's wrong."