7. Unnecessary emotions with classmates

AFTER A LESSON 

VILLIAM'S POINT OF VIEW:

The herbs lesson had gone well. too well, actually. I'd caught myself speaking more than I should've, correcting people, naming rare plants without hesitation. It was starting to draw attention. And attention was the last thing I needed. I slipped away the moment the class ended, clutching my satchel filled with selected herbs. The forest air was a welcome relief, quiet, fresh, less filled with questioning eyes. But it didn't help the gnawing feeling in my stomach. Hunger. Real, raw hunger. I'd barely eaten all day. Again. I crouched near a tree and pulled out a bundle of dried roots from my coat. Most of them were either too bitter or had gone stale. I sighed, chewing slowly on a strip of something leathery and plant-based. It was bitter enough to make me wince, but it was better than nothing.

"This academy food is too strange." I muttered under my breath. "Too salty. Too sweet. Too... not forest."

I needed something plain. Clean. Natural. But the academy meals were all spices and stews and sauces. I couldn't eat much without risking nausea, or suspicion. Footsteps behind me made me stiffen. I quickly tucked the food away.

"Villiam!" A voice chirped. I turned.

 A group of girls from class were walking toward me, smiling in that way that always meant trouble. The tall one, Lisette, I think tilted her head, twirling a curl around her finger.

"We were wondering…" She stepped closer. How someone like you knows so much about herbs. You're kind of mysterious."

Mysterious? No. Dangerous. If you knew. I forced a small smile. 

"Just... years of practice. Nothing special."I said.

One of the younger girls giggled. 

"Nothing special? You practically ran that lesson. Even Miss Iris was impressed."She said.

"Yeah." Lisette said, eyes narrowing slightly. "And you're always so quiet. Strong. Focused. That's kinda attractive, don't you think?"

My entire body tensed. My fingers twitched where they lay on my knee. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe. This was too much. I looked away, forcing calm into my voice. "I'm not really... interested."I said.

They blinked, caught off guard by the bluntness. One of them pouted.

"Aww, shy?" She asked, nudging my shoulder. "Or taken?"

No. Female. But that's not something I can explain, is it? I stood up a little too fast.

"I need to go check my herbs." I muttered, brushing past them.

As I walked off, their disappointed chatter followed me like burrs in my boots. I kept my head down, hands clenched into fists. This is getting harder. Too many eyes. Too many smiles. They didn't know. No one knew.

But if one more girl flirts with me, I'm going to lose my mind, but now I needed go to the headmaster's office.

The walk to the Headmaster's office felt heavier than usual. I hadn't been called, I had gone by choice. A rare, risky thing. But my thoughts were a knot I couldn't untangle alone anymore. I needed clarity. Or at least... direction. The grand doors opened with a low creak, and Headmaster Caelan Vermund looked up from a stack of scrolls, his sharp eyes gleaming beneath silver-streaked brows.

"Villiam." He said calmly, gesturing toward the chair across from him. "A surprise visit. Sit."

I obeyed in silence, legs stiff and uncertain. I kept my mask on. Always the mask. For a long moment, he didn't speak. He simply studied me like a sword he was considering reforging. Then, his voice softened.

"You've done well. Better than expected, even for someone of your... background."He said.

I blinked.

"My background?"I asked.

He smiled faintly.

"The forest doesn't raise weaklings. You survived during a time no one else could. The system only confirmed it your instincts, your adaptability, your strange affinity with rare herbs, creatures…"He explained.

I didn't know what to say. I hadn't expected this. Not praise. Not recognition. He leaned forward slightly, resting his elbows on the desk.

"I want to help you."He said.

That froze me in place.

"You, what?" I asked, voice barely above a whisper.

"I want to polish that rough potential of yours. You're a diamond hidden under layers of grime and bark." His tone was gentle, but it struck hard. "You don't need to be afraid here, Villiam. Even if you pretend you're not."

My cheeks burned beneath the mask. I shifted uncomfortably, unsure if it was embarrassment or something more dangerous. Was he hinting? Did he know?

"Why?" I asked finally.

"Because people like you don't come around often. And I have no interest in letting the world waste someone who survived a war with wolves and came back with them bowing at his side."

I opened my mouth. Closed it. A thousand things rushed to the surface, but I swallowed them all down.

He stood and walked to a shelf, pulling something wrapped in cloth. He placed it in front of me an old book.

"Take this. It's a rare herbal journal from the Northern Wastes. Might help you identify what's safe to eat, and what's not. You look like you haven't had a proper meal in days."He said.

The kindness stung worse than any insult.

"I…"I managed. "Thank you."

He nodded.

"You're doing fine, Villiam. Just don't hide from everyone forever. One day, that mask might get too heavy."Headmaster said and nodded.

I nodded quickly and stood, clutching the book.

"And... if you ever need to speak as yourself, not the name you wear, my door is always open."Headmaster said.

It was like he knew my identity, but I wasn't so sure about it. I reached the door, hand almost on the handle when something inside me tugged hard. The weight in my stomach wasn't just hunger. It was the question I'd been trying to ignore since I first arrived here, starving and gnawing at herbs like a beast.

"Headmaster." I asked, voice steadier than I felt. 'Am I… allowed to eat wild food? Around the school grounds?"

He looked up, a little surprised. Then his expression softened into something almost amused.

"You've already been doing it, haven't you?"He asked.

I didn't answer. My silence said enough. He sighed and moved around the desk again, folding his arms.

"You're not in the forest anymore, Villiam. You don't have to scavenge. But... I suppose it's habit."He said.

"It's not habit." I muttered. "It's survival."

"Is the mess hall not feeding you properly?"He asked.

"They serve fine." I said quickly. "Just... too many people. Too many eyes. Too loud. I know what plants to trust. What roots to boil. What won't make me sick."

Headmaster Vermund considered me for a moment. "You've got instincts people here will never understand. I won't stop you from doing what you must to feel safe."He said.

He gave a short nod. "Yes. You are allowed. Just don't eat anything near the magical wards. Some of those plants bite back."

"Understood."I said.

I left the Headmaster's office with a strange tightness in my chest. He knew. And he didn't try to stop me. The forest edge behind the herb garden was quiet. The air still held the earthy perfume of the morning dew. My fingers brushed against a patch of feverleaf, I tucked a few sprigs into my pouch. Not for eating. Just habit. Comfort. I crouched by a low bush, slicing open a root I knew well. Nutty, starchy. Would boil fine. I sat with it in silence, knife in one hand, the other rubbing at the edge of my mask. Then footsteps. I tensed.

"Yo!" Came a voice. I knew it instantly. Xavier.

I didn't turn.

"You always out here digging up dirt snacks or what?" He added with a chuckle. Not mocking. Curious. Maybe even… concerned.

I didn't look up. 

"Yes."I said.

Silence stretched out awkwardly. I could hear him shifting, his boots crunching dry grass. 

"You know, the food inside is pretty decent. We even got stew today."He said.

"Too crowded." I muttered. "Too loud."

He hummed. I finally glanced up. He was watching me carefully, arms crossed, head tilted like he was studying something fragile and unfamiliar.

"I figured." He said after a beat. "Still. You could've said something sooner."

"To who? You?" I raised a brow.

He grinned. 

"Yeah. Why not?"He said.

I didn't answer that. Instead, I peeled the root with practiced ease and pulled out a folded cloth from my satchel.

"You really trust that stuff?" He asked, crouching beside me.

"I've survived on worse."I said.

He stared for a moment, then his eyes softened.

"You know... you're hard to read. But you're not invisible."

That caught me off guard. I watched how he left and for the first time in weeks, the wild root didn't taste quite so lonely.