Ch3:

...But something was already breathing behind him.

Honestly, Ren wasn't surprised. Reality had already broken him in ways his therapist—if he had one—would never understand.

So when he turned back, his face was the epitome of "I'm so done with this."

There was nothing. Not even a fly. Just the beautiful vermillion of the rising sun.

Never had any sunrise relieved him this much. Yokai were weak in sunlight, right? At least, that's what his occultist friends had told him.

Maybe...just maybe...could he actually bully them for once?

Boom!

The scroll in his hand flew up and smacked him in the back of the head.

Jorogumo sniggered.

||A beautiful view.||

Ren groaned, rubbing his head.

"What did you call 'beautiful'?"

Nurarihyon smirked.

||Your priceless expression when you got smacked, of course.||

~~~

Three yokai and a hopeless human were sitting around a table.

The fourth one had gone out to buy—or steal?—food.

Ren sighed, then said:

"Well, guess we should introduce ourselves now that we're contractor and contractee—ugh! Not that word again..."

A part-spider, part-lady yokai with many legs volunteered to go first.

||I'm Jorogumo. I'm known for being dope-ass hot and eating men who get too close to me. Feel comfortable around me.||

Ren fell from his chair.

"P-pleased to make your acquaintance indeed, Lady Jorogumo."

Jorogumo winked. Then she said darkly:

||Indeed...||

Ren swore he saw her drool.

The eerie silence forced him into speak something as the sole human:

"O-okay. Cool. Anyone else?"

A crow-headed yokai in a business suit, dead from inside, spoke in a disinterested tone:

||I think I introduced myself to Ren-san earlier, but just for his convenience, I'll do it again. ||

He adjusted his tie, switched on the AC—much to Ren's annoyance—and said:

||My name, is Karasujin. I am the Yokai Manager of Tsuyama-shi, Okayama-ken. I hate my job. Thank you.||

Ren, now pale as paper, stared at Karasujin.

Was he dreaming, or was there a hint of a bullied expression on Karasujin's face?

Poor fellow, gods knew that he hated his job, now to be stuck with an unwilling contrac—

||Red paper or blue paper? ||

Everyone turned to the source of that voice.

A masked spirit with a red cloak shifted his chair. Feeling the gazes on him, he said:

||....What? ||

Karasujin sighed

||This is Aka Manto. He's a well-known toilet haunter. The question he just asked is his most common one.||

Aka Manto stared at Karasujin for a while, then said, voice eerie and slightly disdainful:

||I can introduce myself, no thanks. So, yeah: what that crow said was true. I am, indeed, a toilet-haunter. I habitually ask people a simple question: 'Red paper or blue paper?' when they're peeing. If you choose red, you get a bloody death—quite literally.||

Ren seriously considered buying adult diapers.

"And if I choose blue?"

Jorogumo replied on behalf of Aka Manto:

||Eh, nothing. He just strangles you so bad that you turn blue. See, nothing to be scared of at all! ||

Ren fell from his chair again.

"BRO WT—"

Before Ren could complete his sentence, however, he froze.

Below the table, there was an old man with an elongated head, gluttony glowing in his yellow eyes. He growled when he saw that Ren saw him staring at the huge pile of food.

A loud, terrified yell echoed from the dusty ancestral house.

The old man lunged forward. Ren, despite his soul already being halfway out of his body, leapt onto the table like a traumatized cat.

"WHO THE HELL—"

||Oi, oi, calm down.||

Ren DID NOT calm down.

"CALM DOWN?! BRO, THERE'S A CREEPY OLD MAN UNDER THE TABLE!"

Jorogumo yawned.

||That's just Nurarihyon. He's always like that.||

Ren, still gripping the table edge for dear life, blinked rapidly.

"...The hell is a Nurarihyon?"

Karasujin sighed.

||Imagine a freeloading grandpa who thinks your house is his. He just walks in, eats your food, and acts like he owns the place.||

Nurarihyon grinned, revealing far too many teeth for comfort.

||Not just any house. Any place I want. Restaurants, bars, secret government facilities—||

Ren screamed internally.

"DID YOU JUST SAY SECRET GOVERNMENT FACILITIES?"

Nurarihyon shrugged.

||They have great sushi.||

Ren sat back down, absolutely done with life. He buried his face in his hands.

"I hate this. I hate this so much."

Jorogumo patted his shoulder.

"Aw, don't be like that, little contractee. You still haven't met the worst of us yet."

Ren looked up.

"The worst?"

Aka Manto smirked under his mask.

"Oh yeah. He should be here any moment now."

The door slammed open.

A freezing gust of wind howled into the room, blowing out the lanterns. The shadows twisted. The air went cold as death.

Then, from the darkness—

Footsteps.

Ren gulped.

"...Guys?"

Jorogumo, Karasujin, Nurarihyon, Aka Manto—all four of them stiffened.

Aka Manto whispered.

||Oh. Never mind. He's already here.||

The laughter started.

Ren felt his blood run cold.

It came from everywhere. Behind him. Above him. Beneath the floorboards.

Slowly, oh so slowly, Ren turned his head—

And the world went black.