Stella paused all her movements and gently pulled me into her embrace.
Until my tense body gradually relaxed.
"Stella, I'm sorry."
"I thought I could let go of the past, I thought I could start over, but it seems..."
"I must be such a buzzkill like this, huh?"
After saying this, I didn't dare to look directly at Stella, and could only stare at the flickering city lights outside the window.
"Dashiell, look at me."
Stella cupped my face with both hands, her voice gentle yet firm.
"The filth was never on you."
"What's dirty are the hearts of those people, those prejudices, they have nothing to do with you."
In her eyes, there was only heartache and compassion, nothing else.
I wanted so badly to believe her, but my heart remained bitter.
"I understand that logic, but I really... can't do it."
"People's prejudices are like a high wall."
Human nature is unfathomable, and preconceptions are hard to change.
And I seem destined to be trapped behind this wall.
Forever unable to touch the sunlight.
"Dashiell."
Stella pressed her forehead against mine, her voice low and warm.
"I will always be by your side."
"Just like when we were kids, whether climbing mountains or stargazing, whenever you looked back, you'd always see me.""Every time I came home, I'd fall asleep on your back, feeling perfectly safe, as if nothing could scare me. Grandpa said I was too bold. Do you remember how I answered?"
"I said it was because I knew Dashiell would never let me fall or leave me behind, so I felt especially secure on your back."
Her tone was gentle, as if soothing a frightened animal.
Tender kisses fell on my crown and between my brows.
Like the warmest starlight in the dark night, bit by bit, dispelling the darkness.
"You're the one who said you'd marry me since we were little. I've always remembered that."
The next morning when I woke up, I found several unread messages on my phone.
They were all from Serenity.
I neither checked them nor intended to reply.
After that, Serenity never contacted me again.
Five days later, she held an engagement ceremony with that graduate student.
It was a grand affair that stirred up the whole city.
I received many messages, mostly from our mutual friend circles.
One of them was from Serenity: [Dashiell, remember to send me your new address. I want to send you an invitation.]
I ignored it.
I just gazed at Stella on the balcony, in a video conference.
She suddenly turned back, our eyes meeting.
The corners of her mouth lifted in a gentle curve.In the morning light, she was breathtakingly beautiful.
I walked to her side and bent down, lowering my head.
"Stella, kiss me."
The light from the engagement announcement on the phone screen illuminated our embracing silhouettes.
After a moment, Stella sighed softly and led me towards the bedroom.
Returning to New York was half a month later.
A few close friends organized a private dinner party, using the excuse of a long-overdue reunion.
During the meal, everyone tactfully avoided the topic of Serenity.
But no one expected her to show up unexpectedly.
She entered without a word and dragged a chair to sit beside me.
Her face was gloomy.
Her sudden appearance froze the atmosphere in the entire private room.
Dead silence.
After a long while, Serenity finally spoke coldly: "Everyone stops talking as soon as I arrive. Are you rejecting me?"
The friend who organized the gathering forced a smile:
"You're joking, Serenity. We just didn't expect you to come, how could we..."
"Dashiell, you speak!"
Serenity's expression was icy, her gaze locked on me.
Some friends sensed something was wrong and wanted to smooth things over.
Before they could speak, a wine glass was thrown at them.
"Serenity, have you gone crazy?""After all, you're the one who let Dashiell down, and yet you're still throwing a tantrum like this?"
"I'll throw a goddamn tantrum if I want to!"
Serenity suddenly stood up.