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Werewolves: The Apocalypse — The Book of Hungry Names
(Now with 98% more ecological guilt and 100% less graphics)

You and your band of traumatized werewolves (read: a group of poorly resolved furry therapists) must save the Living Earth using two infallible ingredients: homicidal rage and questionable spirituality.

In this interactive novel with hundreds of choices (most leading to inevitable doom), you'll have the chance to face a Wyrm Spirit that manifests itself as... a lie you really want to believe. Like that voice that says "I'll start my diet tomorrow." Only with more cosmic destruction.

 Written by Kyle Marquis and set in the wonderful (cough) universe of World of Darkness, this epic without a single image (but with 1.6 million words, in other words, an abusive relationship with reading) is fueled solely by the most powerful thing in the world: your imagination that has already failed three college entrance exams.

You are a werewolf. And like all good werewolf, you are a mix of:

Shaman who thinks meditation cures demonic migraines,

Hero that nobody asked for,

Monster with existential crises,

And sustainability consultant for Mother Gaia (bankrupt, of course).

Created by the goddess of the Earth, you were gifted with the ability to turn into a wolf (in other words, walk around naked with style), and tasked with the noble mission of preventing humanity from turning the planet into a cosmic McTrash.

But guess what? You failed. Congratulations.

 Three years ago, your pack was part of the Sept of Broad Brook, Massachusetts (land of maple syrup and spiritual doom), where werewolves still pretended they had a chance against the Wyrm — the spirit of destruction, chaos, and people who comment “first” on YouTube.

While other Septs fell like dominoes at a satanic rave, yours was there, firm, strong, and deluded. Some said you would prevent the Apocalypse. Others just thought it was funny to watch the circus burn.

Now, all that’s left is for you to pick up the pieces (literally), avoid becoming an evil spirit’s kibble, and, who knows, write your name in the Book of Hungry Names — the one that eats hopes, New Year’s promises, and happy endings.

Do you want me to adapt this to become the introduction to chapter 1 as well?

Of course! Here's a Desciclopédia-style warning, with a touch of acid and humor, that you can put at the beginning of your story on Wattpad to make everything clear:

WARNING BEFORE SOME LITIGIOUS SPIRIT COMES TO BARK

This work is a humorous reinterpretation (read: full of irony, sarcasm, dark humor and some inconvenient truths) based on the style of interactive stories like those from Choice of Games. But, before anyone calls the lawyers or invokes the spirit of copyright, let's make something VERY clear:

This is not plagiarism. It's parody. It's a joke. It's entertainment.

(And, let's be honest, not even Mother Gaia would bother to sue.)

The writing adopted follows the Desciclopédia style, that is:

Nothing is sacred.

Everything can be a joke.

If you get offended, congratulations, the system worked.

 This is a tongue-in-cheek homage to the classics of the genre, using the interactive format to tell stories that are bizarre, tragic, hilarious, and incredibly stupid (sometimes all at the same time). None of the original Choice of Games content was copied directly—only the structure was inspired, because let’s face it, reinventing the wheel is a lot of work.

If you want an epic journey with deep moral dilemmas, go play the original.

If you want to laugh at your own misfortune while turning into a werewolf and punching mystical capitalism with your paws, go ahead. It’s your house.

Zerk World) Zombo Stars

Bly sniffs. "Well it's good to know we're on the same wavelength."

"Where did he come from?" Jolon asks. "Are we in danger?"

"Good to see you, too," Lapu mutters, looking down at the floor. This may not be the reunion he was hoping for, but he doesn't seem particularly surprised by the reaction. You wonder how Dena will react when she finds out; you can't keep it from her for long.

"Damn it," Tiva says. "We'll have time for questions later." She looks over at Bly. "We need to organize everyone to retreat to another location. Calmly."

Bly rolls her eyes. "Seriously? What are we supposed to tell them?"

"Whatever you have to," Ahote says. "Aside from causing a panic. We could have company any minute—hostile company. Most of the wolves back there are elders, wounded, or both. We can't have them trampling each other."

Jolon pats Bly on the shoulder. "I'll tell them we found a new place to live. We're all so desperate to get out of this place that it'll be an easy sell. It's a lie, but it'll stop a stampede. Can you guard the north side?" Bly nods and they both go on their way.

Lapu rasps out a chuckle. "Good to know you guys have still got it together. I was getting worried there for a second."

I head into the warehouse and help Jolon prepare an organized withdrawal. It will take some careful coaxing to get our elders and wounded to move quickly without creating a panic.

I join Bly and guard the warehouse, ready to fight off anything Maker can throw at us. We may be worrying over nothing, but I have a bad feeling about this.

I recruit Tiva and we scout the perimeter, quietly watching for any signs of invasion.