Happy New Year! Psychos!

Akatsuki Base — Late Afternoon

The hideout was dimly lit, a gentle hum of chakra-infused torches casting flickering shadows on the cave walls. The atmosphere reeked of damp stone, old scrolls, and ominous silence—standard Akatsuki vibes.

Kazuto stood in front of Pain, who reclined casually on his stone seat like a god with better things to do.

Kazuto cleared his throat.

"Mission in Kusahana complete. Arata has been eliminated. Took him out right in the village center—under a hundred sets of eyes. Also left a very clear message not to use our name to scare the weak. Mission was... a success."

Pain gave a slow nod, unimpressed as usual.

Kazuto furrowed his brow. "Still... I don't get it. What did Arata have to do with us? Felt personal."

Pain finally spoke. "It was. Kusahana housed sensitive intel. While you created chaos..." he gestured vaguely, "...Itachi slipped in and extracted critical data. Arata's compound doubled as a place to hold everything of value. Documents were... enlightening as well as some other things."

"Oh," Kazuto blinked. "So I was just the flashy distraction."

"Yes."

Kazuto shrugged. "Understood."

Just then, Konan entered, quiet as ever. She walked over and took her place beside Pain, not saying a word. Her presence always made the air feel tenser, like origami knives might suddenly come flying.

Kazuto, never good with silence, tilted his head.

"If you're a Rinnegan user... that means you've got all the cool tricks, right? Like, Rinne Rebirth?"

Pain arched an eyebrow. "Yes."

Kazuto crossed his arms, eyes narrowing. "Then why the hell are you walking around using a literal corpse as your avatar? I mean—chakra drain much?"

Konan's eye twitched. Pain, ever stoic, remained relaxed.

"Seems kinda inefficient if you ask me—"

"Get out," Konan cut in, her voice sharp like paper slicing wind.

Kazuto held up his hands. "Whoa, alright, I hit a nerve. I'll go chill before I get folded like a letter."

He sauntered out of the chamber and headed toward the central hallway, humming some nonsense tune. That's when he ran into Tobi.

"Hey, Kazuto-san! How'd the mission go?! I bet you totally blew stuff up, didn't you?"

Kazuto groaned, rubbing his temples. "Tobi, you are like an espresso shot with legs...I need dango or something"

"Dango?" Tobi blinked.

Right on cue, Itachi appeared behind them. "I know a place but it's far."

Kazuto raised an eyebrow. "Whoa, Itachi? Volunteering for human interaction? The mission must've melted part of your emotionless shell."

Kazuto turned with a grin. "Alright, partner in the Ku-mission...let's go destroy some dango." He said rephrasing kusahana as mission

---

By the Lake — Twilight

The lake shimmered under a dying orange sky. The wind was crisp. A few fireflies blinked lazily in the reeds.

Kazuto and Itachi sat on a rocky outcrop by the water, dango sticks in hand.

"Mmm... it's been what? Months since I've had dango?" Kazuto licked his lips, his eyes fluttering shut from the sugary hit. "If I die tomorrow, let it be in a rain of mochi sauce."

Itachi glanced sideways. "Who... are you, really?"

Kazuto smirked. "The Crimson Halo?"

"No. You're like... never mind." Itachi's Sharingan deactivated with a blink as he looked away.

"You okay, bro? That sounded like the start of a therapy session,you ill bro?"

Itachi didn't reply. His silence said enough.

Kazuto chuckled softly. 'he's actually sick. Poor guy's a walking tragedy folder.'

He glanced over. "You ever had a crush?"

Itachi froze, lips drawing tight.

"Oh. Oh-ho... that's a yes." Kazuto leaned closer, eyes glinting. "Got rejected? She run off with a Senju?"

Itachi stood without a word and walked toward the base.

"Wait—don't storm off with the snacks!" Kazuto shoved the remaining dango into his mouth and sprinted after him.

Just so you guys know—kazuto(haruto) had no idea about izumi and he forgot it while risking his life

Itachi stopped briefly under the reddening sky, staring at the horizon.

'This time... this exact moment... I was eating dango with her too...'

His thoughts flashed to Izumi. Her smile. Her still body. And then—darkness.

Kazuto slowed, sensing the silence. He said nothing. Just hummed softly.

"I feel like a cloud, floating through the sky~" he sang in a low, silly tune.

---

Timeskip — December 31st, New Year's Eve

A snow-kissed chill floated through the cracks of the Akatsuki base. Outside, the skies were lavender and pink, fading into a velvet night.

Inside, chaos brewed.

Kazuto clapped his hands dramatically. "Okay, listen up!"

All heads turned. Even Pain gave him a slow blink.

"It's New Year's Eve! We should go out, eat something, have fun! You know—fun? That thing normal people do?"

Tobi jumped up. "YES! I've been saying this for years! LET'S GOOOO!"

Everyone else... just stared in cold silence.

Kazuto deflated slightly. "Y'all are hopeless. It's like hanging out with gravestones."

"You're not living life to the fullest," he mumbled.

Deidara raised an eyebrow. "Then tell me, wise one, what is 'the fullest'?"

Kazuto grinned. "Art! I'm great at art!"

Deidara's eyes lit up like explosives. "Really?!" he beamed. "You understand?! LET US SHOW THEM! ART IS—"

"No no no—wait!"

Too late.

---

Outside the Base — Nightfall

The sky was a curtain of stars as Deidara launched a flock of clay birds into the air. They exploded into fiery blooms one after the other.

"ART IS EXPLOSION!!!" he screamed with a manic laugh.

Kazuto ducked behind a rock as a shockwave passed. "I meant sketching! Watercolor! Bob Ross-style!! DOES ANYONE IN THIS GROUP HAVE A NORMAL BRAIN?!"

Everyone averted their eyes. Except Tobi.

"Hey, Kazuto-senpai! How about that restaurant trip now?!"

"And new clothes!" Tobi added.

"Wait—who's paying?" Konan asked, arms crossed.

Kazuto patted his chest proudly. "Former mercenary millionaire at your service!"

Kakuzu instantly appeared beside him. "Millionaire?"

Kazuto stepped back. "More like... a hundred-thousandaire?"

"Oh. I love money."

"I'm coming too," Konan said calmly, stepping forward.

Itachi also silently joined the group. Hidan muttered something about sacrifices and walked off. Kakuzu mumbled something about bounty targets. Kisame shrugged. "I don't do crowds but I sure don't miss fireworks" he grinned

Sasori stood up from the ground "I'll come."

---

Marketplace — Late Night

The Akatsuki strolled into town, dressed like regular shinobi. Civilians were too distracted with festival prep to notice the mass-murdering bingo book legends walking by.

Kazuto handed out wads of ryo. "Alright—Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Kisame—you get spending money. Make good choices."

Konan walked beside him. "We need a bed. And maybe a cabinet for him'"

Kazuto squinted. "For a de- ok?"

"what?" She said grabbing a necklace too. "And this."

The total: 56,700 ryo. Including multiple outfits for Pain that amounted to 25,000 ryo. A dead man still getting clothes from his lover

This is love

Kazuto wept internally. "I didn't even buy Naruto this much in filler episodes!"

"do you have dimension space?" Konan raised an eyebrow.

Kazuto hesitated. "How'd you—?"

"Pain has a dimension...thing thought you'd have that too"

'this pain has this thing?"

He stored it all and followed her out.

---

City Center — 11:59 PM

"Look!" Deidara held up a potato on a stick like it was divine treasure.

Kisame was already staring skyward. "I'm just here for the fireworks."

Itachi stood silently, a lone crow perched on his shoulder.

Everyone gathered. The countdown began.

"Five!"

"Four!"

"Three!"

"Two!"

"One—!"

BOOOOM!

Fireworks exploded in a kaleidoscope of reds, purples, and golden bursts. The night sky became a living painting. The Akatsuki, oddly peaceful, stood in awe.

Kazuto grinned, eyes reflecting the lights.

"Happy New Year, you psychopaths."

Author's corner

Finally the psychos spend a splendid new year!

I really tried to perfect this chapter several times and this is what I came up with it's at the top of my abilities