Chapter 6: I Accidentally Became a Heavenly Trial Candidate Because I Thought ‘Tribulation’ Was a Dessert

Being summoned by Sect Leader Mo Tianyun was supposed to be an honor. A sacred calling. A moment when destiny whispered your name.

Lin Feng, however, had a piece of tofu stuck in his teeth the whole way there.

"Do you think he wants to talk about dessert?" he asked Mr. Whiskers, who purred like a thundercloud.

The duck quacked dismissively, perched on Lin Feng's shoulder like a judgmental shoulder parrot.

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In the Sect Leader's Hall

Mo Tianyun sat at the head of a jade table, sipping tea with the composure of someone who definitely didn't just witness this boy tame a tiger using poultry.

"Lin Feng," he said, voice like wind brushing across a frozen lake.

"Yes, Your Legendary Sectliness?" Lin Feng bowed. Kind of. Half-bowed, actually. He tripped on the duck.

Mo Tianyun blinked slowly. "You have been chosen for the Heavenly Selection Trials."

Lin Feng's eyes lit up. "Oh! I love selections. Do we get cake?"

Mo Tianyun paused.

"No," he said. "You will undergo trials forged by the ancient heavens. Spiritual tribulations that test the soul, body, and will of all those who aspire to rise above mortal limitations."

Lin Feng frowned. "Wait. Tribulations? I thought that was a dessert."

Elder Mu Dan, standing nearby, audibly facepalmed.

"It's not a dessert," she hissed. "It's when the heavens try to kill you to see if you're worthy."

"Oh." Lin Feng blinked. "So… spicy dessert."

Mo Tianyun coughed once, the closest he had ever come to laughter. "You depart at dawn."

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The Next Morning – Departure Platform

Lin Feng stood on the jade platform in fresh robes. Mr. Whiskers wore a bandana with the words "Trial Tiger" stitched in qi-thread. The duck had fashioned itself a tiny cape out of Lin Feng's old socks.

A portal shimmered before them—swirling gold and white, pulsing with divine energy.

Disciples gathered to watch. Some cheered. Others placed bets.

"Ten spirit stones he explodes within five minutes!"

"I'll take that! The duck might carry him!"

Mo Tianyun approached, placing a glowing jade talisman in Lin Feng's hand.

"This will protect you… once. Use it wisely."

Lin Feng smiled brightly. "Thanks! I'll use it the moment someone offers me dessert."

"That is not how—never mind," Elder Mu Dan muttered.

The portal flared. The duck flapped. Mr. Whiskers stretched like he was heading to a nap rather than divine judgment.

Lin Feng stepped through.

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Inside the Heavenly Trial Realm

BOOM.

Lightning arced through the sky like drunken dragons. Floating islands rotated lazily around a black sun. Rivers ran uphill. A mountain sneezed.

Lin Feng landed face-first in celestial grass.

"Ow."

The duck landed on his head.

Mr. Whiskers landed on a passing demon-bird.

The trial realm's voice echoed through the heavens:

"Welcome, Chosen. Face the First Trial: The Nine-Hell Mirror Maze of Inner Demons."

Lin Feng sat up, rubbing his forehead. "Wait. Mirror maze? I hate those. My nose always looks weird in magical reflections."

A giant obsidian gate rose before him, pulsing with ominous red light.

A sign hung crookedly on the door:

No Running, Screaming, or Duck Biting Inside the Maze.

The duck narrowed its eyes.

Lin Feng cracked his knuckles. "Alright, team. Let's face our inner demons like real cultivators."

He stepped inside.

Thirty seconds later:

"AAAAHHHH! WHO PUT A SNAKE THERE?!"

"Quack!"

"Mr. Whiskers, stop licking the evil fog!!"

The maze trembled.

Somewhere, the realm spirit sighed. "Why… why this one?"

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Back at the Sect

Mo Tianyun stared into his tea as Elder Mu Dan approached.

"You really sent him into the Heavenly Trials?"

He nodded.

"He'll either survive… or the heavens will surrender just to get rid of him."

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