Chapter 11: Secrets in the Soap & The Janitor’s Curse

Chapter 11: Secrets in the Soap & The Janitor's Curse

Location: Principal's Office, 3:66 a.m. (yes, that's the real time)

Liana hadn't even finished brewing her "Do Not Disturb Unless You're On Fire" coffee when the janitor walked in.

He wasn't alone.

The mop walked too.Yes—walked.Like it had knees. And regrets.

Liana stared at it. "Okay, I've accepted a lot of things. A sentient mop is… new."

"It's not sentient," the janitor said. "It's cursed. Ancient. Possibly a prince."

[System Warning: You are now in proximity of a Tier-3 Cursed Object: 'Mopheus the Moist.']

Liana blinked. "Mopheus?"

"It whispers prophecies while cleaning blood," said the janitor. "Only blood."

Flashback: The Janitor's Curse

Long ago, before Liana's transmigration, before Vault Girl broke math, the Academy had a Sanitation Division. Their motto was "We Clean, You Don't Die."

They were more important than the battle mages.

Until something in Vault 0 escaped.

Only one man survived. He got cursed. His mop got promoted.

Now he wanders the halls, cleaning unholy slime, sealing crypt leaks, and occasionally slapping ghosts with disinfectant.

Back to Now:

The janitor set down a bottle.

It glowed faintly. The label read:

"SOAP: Sanctified, Occult, Aggressively Purging"

"This ain't just soap," he growled. "It's soulbound. Limited supply. And the Academy's rot is waking up."

Liana narrowed her eyes. "Define 'rot.'"

[System Alert: Academy-wide energy shifts detected. Unknown magical signatures surfacing. Something… below.]

The janitor nodded. "There's a reason the basements don't end."

Meanwhile: The Forbidden Plumbing Shaft

Vault Girl, following a magical duck she summoned by accident, found a hatch.

It pulsed with dark aether. Runes in a dead dialect of Elvish read:

"Cleanse not the sin beneath, lest the soap scream your name."

She opened it.

Elsewhere: The Phoenix Screamed

Then burst into fire and shouted:

"SHE TOUCHED THE DRAIN."

Liana stood. "That can't be good."

Location: Sub-Level Negative 9

Vault Girl descended.

Everything smelled like mildew and repressed trauma.

She stepped on a sigil.The wall breathed.And a voice whispered:

"You have awakened… the Filth King."

A door melted open.Inside: a throne of porcelain and hair.And a man wearing robes made entirely of wet towels.

"WELCOME, CLOGCHILD," he boomed.

Vault Girl blinked. "I just wanted a snack…"

Back Upstairs

Janitor: "Yep. She found the Drain Lord. This is how the last dimension cracked."

Liana: "Okay. We handle this logically."

Mordain teleported in wearing hazmat robes and wielding a bleach cannon.

"Time to clean house."

Chaos Ensues

The Arcane Enforcers accidentally join a cult made of sentient plumbing fixtures.

The slime girl merges with mildew and gains a new passive: Fungus Friend (Rank A).

The phoenix is now wearing goggles and calling itself "Captain BurnSanitize."

Vault Girl is offered a position as "Princess of Pipe Gloom."

She declines by sneezing—causing a burst of divine anti-rot energy that purifies the entire sub-level and sends the Drain Lord back to the fantasy version of a municipal sewer.

Aftermath

Liana collapses into her office couch again.

[Achievement Unlocked: Unclogged Cosmic Horror][New Item: Enchanted Soap Bomb x3][Janitor Approval +2]

The mop bows.The janitor leaves a plunger with glowing runes.The System hiccups.

Vault Girl wanders in with snacks.

"Did I miss anything?"

Liana just laughs. Maniacally.

End of Chapter 11