My Cutie

Nox saddled Gerhart and set off. It had been a long time since he had traveled alone, a strange sense of emptiness had accompanied him; it was something he still couldn't get used to.

After several hours of riding, he spotted a small figure on horseback on the horizon. It was approaching quickly and with chaotic energy.

"What the hell...?" he muttered under his breath.

The rider came closer, and finally, Nox recognized the familiar figure. It was Syrren, completely disheveled, with a look on her face that spelled trouble and unmistakable determination.

Two horsemen followed far behind her, no more than small dots on the horizon.

"Nox! Run! Not now, just turn around!" she screamed, not even trying to explain the situation.

Without asking anything, Nox turned Gerhart around and both of them galloped back toward his estate. After an hour of riding, they had left the pursuers far behind, but it wasn't until they reached the main building that they dared to slow down.

Syren jumped off her horse and said, "That was awful. As if the universe decided I should die today at the hands of those two imbeciles."

"Umm....Who are they?" Nox asked, "And why are you running away?"

"Ugh, questions again," she groaned. "We were playing cards, and they lost. Now they want their money back."

Nox thought about her words for a second before replying: "So... You cheated them."

"I won. There is a subtle difference." She looked at him with a mix of scorn and exhaustion. "If you're such a saint, you can give them back the money. In the meantime, I'm going to rest."

"Hang on...You're staying here?!",

"Yes. If you don't mind, of course. And even if you do, I'm staying anyway." She shrugged. "I don't feel like running again. Maybe tomorrow. I just need to hide from the people I stole from, for a bit."

Nox's eyebrows shot up. "A moment ago, you said you won a card game with them."

"Same thing," Syrren said with a wide grin.

Nox sighed. "Ok. But you'll have to help me."

Syrren stopped mid-step and slowly turned toward him.

"No. No. Nox. Don't even start. I know what you're going to say. And I'm already tired of it."

"I need training. Mental training," he said, dead serious. "I want to control myself. Especially around Torven."

Syren was silent for a moment, then replied. "Let's discuss this tomorrow," and went inside without even waiting for him.

Nox woke up early in the morning. All he wanted to know is how to protect Torven. He wanted to keep him safe.

Syren astonishingly quickly made herself at home in Nox's estate. Her boots were scattered across the hallway, cards were mixed on the table, and empty bottles rolled across the floor. 

"Oh gods, what is this shit...", Nox muttered under his breath trying to assess the situation with his blood pressure rising.

But they had to start with an honest conversation about something else first.

"Syrren," Nox began slowly, "Can you really help me?"

She paused for a moment, then replied, "No. You'll help yourself. It was stupid of you to send Cutie away, you know," she added with a sigh. "Look, I get it, you're afraid you'll use your powers on Torven. Has that ever happened?"

"Yes," Nox admitted quietly. "Right at the beginning. I summoned Torven without even realizing it; if I hadn't, I wouldn't have survived." He stopped for a second to think before continuing, "That was the first time. And later... I'm pretty sure I have done it at his house. My Mark, it had grown somehow, after I got caught in a bear trap."

"Did you know how to use your power then?" Syren asked.

"No," he said. "Back then, I didn't even know I had it."

Syren smiled.

"You get what I'm saying, right?" she continued, rubbing her fingers against her forehead like the conversation was starting to give her a headache. "Back then, your body was running on instinct, exhausted, just trying to survive. And you didn't know how to control your powers. But that's not where you are anymore. You're not that ticking bomb, Nox. You're just someone who's been handed more power than he knew what to do with. But that power is not really evil in itself, and besides, you now know how to control it"

Nox let that sink in. He thought of Torven, of how he had stood by him, even after he learnt what he instinctively did to him, and how he had reached out instead of pulling away. And how he had looked at him with more faith than Nox had in himself.

A slow and steady breath left his chest, and without giving himself time to second-guess it, he locked himself in the bedroom and began to write a letter to Torven.

He pondered for a minute what to write, how to explain everything.

"Dear Torven, I am writing to you because..." 'No, sounds weird, too formal.' Nox grimaced and scratched it out immediately.

He took another piece of paper and started:

"Hi Torven! How are you today?"

'This is just as bad...' he thought to himself and crumpled the paper.

He thought for a very long time before writing an entire letter:

"Torven,

Hi. So. I don't really know how to write letters. Obviously. This is probably the worst letter you have ever seen. I'm really sorry about that.

I guess I wanted to say something? I've been... thinking. A lot. Mostly about you. But about the other stuff, too. The... everything. You know what I mean.

Anyway, I hope you're not mad. Or dead. Or mad and dead. That would be quite unfortunate.

See you soon

Nox"

He looked at the letter and read it carefully again.

"Gods, this is horrendous," he muttered, mortified, staring at the letters on the piece of paper.

And it wasn't just his wording. It was... everything. The ink was already smudged from where he had dragged his hand across the page. The piece of paper seemed slightly crumpled, and his handwriting got worse with every line, as if even his pen didn't want to write it. The entire thing just reeked of desperation.

He ran a hand down his face.

"What am I even doing?" he whispered to himself, tearing the letter into the tiniest pieces, scared that someone would read it.

The figurine in Nox's pocket was digging into his leg now, so he took it out and carefully looked at it. It was just as ugly as before. He then clenched it tightly in his fist and stormed out of his room, heading to see Syrren immediately.

"I'm leaving. Look after the estate for me," said Nox quickly. He paused when he noticed Syrren had spread his coat across the floor like a picnic blanket.

For a moment, he considered taking it back, but instead just sighed and added, "And maybe clean up a little while you're at it."

"Say "hi" to our Cutie from me," responded Syrren with a cheeky smile.

'MY Cutie, if anything,' thought Nox to himself.

With this, he ran to the stable to get Gerhard ready. It was time to go to Torven.