CHAPTER 05-LASCAUX

The deafening high-beat music of the night club made Elias dazed and confused. Even at the sight of a horned demon, now with its caprine skull fully apparent, the crowd simply did not care. Elias looked at the booths, thinking to himself, still unable to speak.

"I have to find him…I don't know how much longer I have."

As Elias made his way through the club, he couldn't help but notice all the looks directed at him. Before he knew it, the dancefloor had turned into a circular crowd. Elias, inside his mind, viewed all of those people as relentless monsters, giggling to themselves with huge, monstrous grins, all while recording Elias. He stood there, taking his hands to his skull.

"Fuck…What do I do?!"

Elias thought, before the music suddenly changed to an even more energetic and heavily mixed sound. The flickering lights turned red, focusing on him. The microphone from the DJ's booth emitted a high pitch sound, as Rudy's voice came along.

"Sup, Elias. Sick horns. What is that, some sort of gay kink of yours? Don't worry, I ain't no homophobe! I'll beat you just as much as I'd beat you if you were a straight loser instead of a gay loser."

He laughed. Rudy could be seen on top of a scaffolding, near his hired DJ, holding his pistol.

"What are you after, huh, Elias? You were nobody before you worked for me, motherfucker. Nobody. Your parents were threatening to kick your leech ass out of their home if you didn't get a job, and you couldn't get a job anywhere. I accepted you, you ungrateful cunt! And now, you stab me in the back? Who the fuck hired you, huh? The damn cartel?"

Elias, already tired of being unable to speak, does not even try. He just thinks to himself angrily, clenching his now withered fist.

"About damn time I did something about you, you son of a bitch."

Rudy laughs to himself, still pointing the weapon at Elias.

"You think you're unbeatable just because you have a puny little demon inside of ya? Ain't nobody scared of Burdens here, boy. We've killed tougher motherfuckers than you. You don't even have a decent one. Who the fuck is that?!"

He giggled, as seven hellspawns surrounded Elias. Using their hellspawn anatomy, they surrounded their bodies with raging fire. Rudy continued his banter, as the crowd filmed.

"You know why I only work with hellspawns as bodyguards, Elias? Aside from their size and strength, they have cool abilities that we frail humans aren't lucky enough to have. Spontaneous heat generation, accelerated healing…The fact that they don't need to eat, drink or sleep is a cool little plus either."

As Rudy smiled, proud of himself, one of the hellspawns took a step forward.

"Remember our drills."

As he finished his sentence, he lunged at Elias, punching his caprine skull with his fiery fist. The punch immediately broke Elias's outer skull, showing half of his now burnt face. As Elias fell to the ground, grunting from the concussion, the hellspawn started shrieking desperately in sheer agony and shock. The hand from which he threw the punch was completely split, broken in half. His bones, now entirely visible, were cracked and slicing his own skin and tendons apart, initiating a fountain of blood. The other hellspawns and Rudy stared at the scene in shock, as the DJ switched beats once again. The dancefloor was now pitch black, with brief lighting emanating from the floor on which they were stepping; The main source of light was the fire from the hellspawns themselves.

"Oh. Did I mention they also have night vision?!"

The six remaining hellspawns ran towards Elias, now hitting him in unison. Being showered by potent punches and kicks from all directions, Elias took a small step back every time he was struck. By the end of their hits, Elias was already limping on the floor, dripping a blackish blood from his veins, mixed with his own. His caprine skull was now more than halfway destroyed, with only a portion of the left side remaining. The hellspawns, however, stopped the aggression, falling back, looking at their own wounded hands and legs.

"What the fuck is this guy? We hurt ourselves when we hit him!"

As one of them exclaimed, confused, they started recovering from the pain. The previously wounded hellspawn, with his hand entirely split, started crawling away. Rudy seemed slightly desperate, seeing his final trump card struggling so much to neutralize what he considered a weak threat.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO I PAY YOU IDIOTS FOR? KILL HIM ALREADY!"

He exclaimed through the microphone. Elias stood up, struggling to maintain his balance. He looked at his body, thinking to himself, breathing heavily.

"I'm getting beat hard. But, from all the hits I took, I should've been dead already. This form…Must enhance my body somehow. If they hurt themselves when they hit me…"

Elias took a step forward, running towards the hellspawns, his arms facing down and his face facing forward.

"I'll let them hit me as much as they want!"

As he concluded his thought, he was immediately struck on the human part of his face, being sent flying to the other side of the dance floor. His cheek was ripped off entirely, and most of his teeth flew through the dance floor. Elias spat out a disgusting amount of blood, gushing all over his trajectory mid-air. He landed on one of the many stereo boxes, exploding it with the sheer force of impact, remaining incapacitated from the shock. As the crowd filmed, the lights turned back on, and Rudy laughed out loudly.

"I GOT YOU, MOTHERFUCKER! I GOT YOU GOOD, DIDN'T I?! YOU CAN'T FUCK WITH ME, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"

Rudy pointed to Elias with his pistol, signaling to his men.

"We got a Burden, boys! I bet the bounty for this sucker is at least three million. We partying good tonight!"

The hellspawns signaled positively to their boss's orders. Elias just laid on the destroyed stereo box, bloody and beaten, with the human half of his face totally unrecognizable, gushing even more blood as his neck involuntarily bent down, since he could barely keep up with the weight of his skull. As the hellspawns approached Elias more and more, the time around him seemed to stop inside his own mind. As he instinctively looked up, he could see Anna, staring at his fallen body.

"Look at you."

She giggled. Elias tried to speak, barely babbling something out, letting more pieces of his broken teeth fall out.

"A-Anna…?"

Anna kneeled in front of him, placing her hand on his face. Her hand was neither cold nor hot; All Elias could feel from that touch was complete and utter emptiness.

"You're even uglier than before. You barely have a face anymore."

Elias looked at her, breathing heavily.

"I…I wanted…"

Anna interrupted Elias, shushing him.

"What did you want? Did you think you would save someone? You can't even save yourself."

Elias started sobbing. His warm tears mixed with the blood splashes sprouting from his face.

"I wanted…I wanted to live."

Anna held his face with her other hand, cupping his chin.

"Did you? Then why did you kill yourself five days ago?"

Elias cried even more. The time around him barely made sense. Rudy, the crowd, the hellspawns; All gone. All he could focus on was Anna. Her pale, freckled skin, mint green eyes, delicate smile and basic fingernails were all he could rest his eyes on. But, deep down, he knew that wasn't exactly her. As crude she could be with him, Anna was a sweet woman and would never say things of this connotation directly. He was convinced that the woman in front of him was a mere distortion created by his sick mind in order to torture himself as a twisted form of self penance for his undoings.

"I did it because…I…I couldn't handle it."

Anna let go of his wounded face. His blood didn't even stain her skin.

"Or maybe you did it because you wanted attention."

Elias's eyes widened.

"What…What do you mean?"

Anna giggled to herself, sitting in front of him. The surroundings distorted themselves, turning into a cheerful, sunny playground. Elias wasn't wounded anymore; Nor did he have his part-goat skull. He stood up, looking around.

"Where…Am I?"

Elias asked. Anna then started walking through the park, phasing through the objects. None of the bystanders seemed to acknowledge the existence of neither of them. Elias followed, looking in a certain level of horror as he phased through the objects and people as well.

"You're in that park you used to go, near your old home. Remember? The one in the western part of town, back where was the old casino."

Elias looked around, recognizing everything.

"I…I remember. But, why are you reminding me of this?"

Anna pointed to one of the swings of the park.

"That's you."

A young Elias sat on the swing, looking sad and grumpy, pressing the chains on the swing as a way to try and calm himself. Elias was clearly overweight, and looked considerably different. Anna looked at Elias, laughing.

"You were pretty chubby."

Elias looked at the young version of himself, showing clear disgust. He seemed resentful towards his own memories.

"No, not chubby. Just flat out obese. Don't sugarcoat it to pretend you feel bad."

Anna looked at the younger Elias.

"I do feel bad. People felt bad for you, Elias."

Elias clenched his fist.

"No, they didn't."

Anna held his fist, pressing it down.

"They did, but not in the way you imagine. They didn't feel bad for you as someone who feels bad when they see a sad person. They felt bad for you like someone who feels bad when they see a sick, starving hobo on the sidewalk. You know it's ugly and disgusting, but you would be judged if you just left him…Or IT…There."

The younger Elias sees a small group of three girls passing near the swing. As he tries to force a smile for them, they look at him and laugh, whispering to each other as they walk. He then stands up from the swing, starting to walk towards his home. Anna questioned Elias, turning her head.

"I thought your mother was neglectful. Neglected children are usually malnourished, not the other way around."

Elias's affection and regret towards "Anna" had already shifted. By this point, he had already understood that the woman talking to him was nothing but a self sabotaging reflection of his own mind. But, somehow, talking to it was the most comforting social experience he could have. He responded with a bitter tone.

"You act as if only loving mothers fed their child. My mom loved to dump food on me so I didn't bother her. I also never left my home, so I was just eating and rotting away in my room."

Anna shrugged.

"Well, at least you weren't starving."

Elias stared as his younger self made his way home.

"Not physically, at least."

Anna started following the younger Elias, and so did he. As the youngling arrived home, he opened the door, as both Anna and Elias followed right behind. The boy sat on the couch by himself, as his mother walked in the room, smoking a cigarette, fiddling with her phone. He waved to his mother, speaking excitedly.

"H-Hi, mom! I'm home!"

The woman looked at the young Elias, blowing smoke out of her cigarette.

"Jesus-Fuck. I mean, uh…Damn it, boy. Already? I told you to go take a walk to see if you lose some of that fat in your belly and you come back in ten minutes? I bet you snuck out just so you could go to that damn ice cream truck."

The youngling's smile faded, as he tucked his shirt, trying to hide his own stomach.

"I took a walk, but…I had to come back. There were too many people at the park."

His mother didn't even look back at him. She remained clicking icons on her phone.

"Whatever, I gave up on you a long time ago. I just tell you to do something so your stepfather can climb out of my ass. Go to your room now, I'm busy."

Young Elias then stood up, looking at the woman's phone.

"Why are you on your phone so much these days?"

She shifted her look away from the icons, staring at the youngling with anger.

"Do I need to explain myself to YOU, Elias? I'm playing slots. You don't even know what that is."

The child's eyes widened, as he took a step back.

"Y-You're…Gambling?"

Elias's mother stood up, pointing at his face, with a wrath filled stare.

"DON'T YOU SAY THAT FUCKING WORD! I WORK MY ASS OFF SO I CAN TAKE CARE OF YOU AND YOUR SISTER, AND YOU, A NINE YEAR OLD FAT CRYBABY, WANTS TO TELL ME SOMETHING ABOUT MY LIFE?!"

As she screamed, the young Elias promptly teared up. A deep voice echoed from the kitchen, near where Elias and Anna were standing.

"Hey, Kinsley! Calm down, will you?! Just let the boy go to his room, I'm trying to put Valorie to sleep here!"

Kinsley pointed to the stairs.

"Go."

She exclaimed, almost whispering but in an extremely threatening tone. The young Elias ran upstairs, quietly sobbing, entering his room. Anna and Elias watched, looking at the door to the boy's room.

"You told me your mom never hit you."

Elias looked at Anna, almost in disbelief.

"Sometimes I wished she would've hit me. It would end quicker than her, uh…Episodes."

Anna took her fingers to her chin.

"Episodes?"

Elias looked at Kinsley, that was sitting on the same spot where young Elias was. She had lit up another cigarette, opening a beer with one hand and clicking on her cellphone with the other.

"My mom wasn't a bad woman. But, as I grew older, she was starting to lose herself. She always liked to drink, but…It got out of control after a while. She started drinking almost every single day. Then, my uncle introduced her to gambling. Then, all she wanted to do all day was sit on the couch playing slots and smoking. There were days where she wouldn't even bother to smoke outside."

Anna giggled.

"That explains the ashy stench."

Elias looked at her with a grim expression.

"Haha, very funny."

He ironized, as he climbed the stairs, phasing through the door that led to his own room. Anna followed. Both of the spectators looked as young Elias cried, petting a puppy Jonah. Jonah climbed on Elias's bed, laying beside him, rubbing himself against his face playfully.

"J-Jonah…"

He sobbed to himself, patting the dog. Anna pointed.

"Jonah was pretty cute."

Elias looked down.

"He still is."

She laid on Elias's shoulder, mocking him with guilt.

"And you still blew your brains out in the desert, leaving him all alone, not even knowing when your parents would come back. Do you know if he's still alive, even? He would've starved by now."

Elias clenched his nails deep in his skin, as his heart sank in guilt and sadness.

"Shut your mouth."

Anna leaned towards Elias, whispering in his ear.

"The fact is that you're nobody. Deep down, you know that. You were never smart or a genius, just because you could do simple tasks easily when you were in fourth grade or something. You're slim and tall now, but you're just as awkward as that chubby weird kid from the swings. Your mom is a gambling addicted semi alcoholic that would die if she passed four hours without a cigarette. Your stepdad is a failed cop that has to work gigs as a bouncer to earn some money, and despises you for not carrying on his own failed dreams. You never had a friend. Never had a girlfriend or anything remotely close to that. You died and nobody even noticed. Not even your own family. You vanished, and nothing changed. And now, you won't be able to collect those sins, and will vanish for good. Was it worth it, Elias Lascaux?"

Elias looks at his younger self.

"You're right. My mom is a gambling addict that spends all day chugging cheap beer and falsified cigarettes. My stepdad is a dumbass that failed cop school and works as a bouncer in sluthouses like I did. My sister is a spoiled brat that learned how to suck a dick before learning how to spell her own fucking name. I am Elias Lascaux, the biggest fuckup to ever crawl out of a womb. I am a waste of life, a waste of oxygen. A waste of space."

The memory surrounded scenario around both of them distorted itself, starting to crumble. Anna looked around, still smiling in a creepy manner.

"You've grown to accept it, hm?"

Elias stands up, admiring his own crumbling memories.

"I am destined to die alone. A failure. A complete and utter failure. I destroy everything I touch. I am poisonous. I am a self pitying, lying, manipulative piece of garbage. I beg people for their sympathy, and then betray their trust for my own benefit, just to feel bad for my own actions and commit it all over and over again."

Anna looks at her hands, seeing that she's fading. Her eyes widen a bit.

"Then what are you going to do? Kill yourself again? You don't have the guts."

Elias angrily leaped towards Anna, grabbing her by the neck, starting to strangle her. Her provocative grin quickly starts fading, as she gasps profusely for air. Elias uses all of his strength on her neck, shoving his fingers deep in her windpipe, pressing and pressing more as the seconds go by. Finally, Anna passes out, and Elias breaks her neck by forcing it to the side. All of the memories around him crumble, and so does Anna. When he finally comes to be, the hellspawns are steps away from reaching him, ready to finally end his life. His cheek and caprine skull start to regenerate, as if his body was replacing the broken pieces with newly generated bones. He looks up, thinking to himself.

"I'll do whatever I want. Because I'm tired…"

A hellspawn slashed Elias's head with his burning palm, aiming to separate his head from his neck. Elias promptly blocked the attack with his elbow, breaking the man's hand.

"Of being Elias Lascaux."

He stood up, grabbing the man by the throat and lifting him in the air. He pressed his windpipe, replicating the move he used to kill "Anna", immediately breaking his neck. With his now enhanced strength, the man's head immediately exploded, splattering brains on all the hellspawns and painting the white caprine skull entirely red. The five hellspawns stood up, staring at Elias, as a menacing pressurized plasma-like energy emanated from his body.

"T-That's…Penance?! His Penance quadrupled in just eight seconds?!"

Elias looked at them through his skull, also gazing at the crowd and Rudy. Rudy was entirely shook, and so was the audience, with many of them petrified. As Rudy tried to step back, he accidentally pressed a button on the DJ's set, making all of the club's lights bright red, starting another high-beat mix. The hellspawns rushed Elias in unison, once again overpowering him with heat-imbued punches, aiming to break his caprine half in order to expose his human body. Elias started angrily headbutting the fist of every single hellspawn that punched him, with each headbutt becoming progressively stronger and stronger. By the fifth headbutt, his strike was strong enough to entirely rip out the man's hand, just as he did with his first enemy. Elias grabbed the incapacitated man by his suit and spun him with force, taking all the men down to the ground. As they grunted in pain, staring at their broken hands and the fully intact Elias, the Burden stood there.

"H-He's…He's not even trying…W-Who is this demon?!"

Elias's arms started shaking, emitting the disgusting sound of meat being ripped from the inside out. After the shaking stopped, the ulna from both of his forearms pierced his withered skin, acting as two large and sharp swords. He pointed the bones towards the hellspawns, as he thought to himself once again.

"The most selfish act one can make is to bring life into this world. No one asked to be born. No one consented to it, and no one would if they knew what would become of their lives. Please…Understand that…I can't live without being a bad person. That's just how things are."

As the desperate, wounded hellspawns rushed towards Elias, he promptly ran back at them, easily overcoming their speed. As the first hellspawn tried to swing at his skull, he ducked underneath the strike, quickly piercing the hellspawn's stomach with his left blade. With the blade already inside his stomach, Elias pushed his bone upwards, lacerating and ripping the man, making all of his organs leak out. The second hellspawn, trying to take advantage of the opening generated by the previous counter-attack landed by Elias, tried to grab one of his horns in order to pull his face towards a knee strike. As soon as he was grabbed, Elias removed the blade from inside the body of the fallen hellspawn, quickly slicing the hand that grabbed him. Before the bodyguard could even take the time to scream in pain, the large, sharp bone slit his throat wide open, ending his life. The three remaining hellspawns interrupted their advance, staring at Elias with fear in their eyes.

"T-This Penance…It's not like any demon I've ever seen. Who is this Burden?!"

As Elias let out multiple muffled grunts from behind his mask, the bones tore even larger rippages on his now entirely deformed forearms.

"It hurts…It hurts so much."

The pain was excruciating, almost too much to bear. The many years of accumulated self-harm had given Elias quite the pain tolerance. The humiliating sensation of a blade tearing his skin over and over again took him back to his frail, miserable past, where he would sit still in his room for hours on end, mutilating himself with a razor blade, trying to vent out his frustration with a destructive outlet.

"All of this…Reminds me of where I failed."

As he stood there, totally quiet, the three hesitant hellspawns rushed him once again, trying desperately to cause even the slightest of damages on Elias.

"I am a mistake. The worst there ever was."

Elias slashed two of the hellspawns before they could even close the distance, slashing their chests open, making them fall to the ground, leaking blood and organ pieces. The last one quickly dropped to his knees, shaking in fear.

"P-PLEASE! I-I DON'T KNOW WHICH ENTITY YOU ARE, Y-YOUR MAJESTY. SPARE ME! OFFER ME A PACT! I'LL BE YOUR ETERNAL SERVANT!"

Elias ignored him, looking back at the two wounded hellspawns, shoving the bone blades deep in their backs, twisting it, ending their lives by destroying their main inner organs and veins. Taking the bloodied blades out, he stared at the begging hellspawn, thinking to himself, as the bleeding and pain drove his vision dark.

"I'm not an entity. I can't save you…I can't even save myself."

He plunged the blade in the man's solar plexus, watching as he gave his very last gasps for air.

"I'm just a Burden."

He took out the blade and twisted it on the way out, finishing him as he did the others. The hellspawn that had his hands broken by Elias's skull was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, the blood from the corpses of the bodyguards started flowing outside of their wrists, materializing a sheet of paper. As Elias grabbed these papers and analyzed them, he saw that each paper contained the person's full name, main life events and a list of all their sins. The hellspawns had similar infractions; Homicide, corruption of innocence, adultery, blasphemy…The sins of them all combined summed up to fifty sins worth of debt. The sin papers evaporated after a few seconds, being absorbed by Elias's body. He grunted, feeling a deep mix of satisfaction and guilt, as he could almost tell directly that his debt had just been lowered. His body felt lighter, as if the entity inside of him was no longer rebelling due to the sin starvation. He pointed his bloodied blades to Rudy, that was now staring paralyzed with fear. Without saying a single word, Rudy started running frantically through the club, shooting twice at Elias as he ran, missing both times. Elias calmly climbed the stairs, as all of the previous partygoers were far gone. As he made his way to the VIP booths, two human bodyguards tried to stand between Elias and the booth. One of them announced, his handgun already aiming at Elias.

"B-BACK OFF, BURDEN! W-WE ALREADY CALLED OPACT! STAY WHERE Y-"

His order was immediately interrupted, as the two bone blades were immediately shot from Elias's forearms, hitting both of the bodyguards as sharp crossbow bolts, impaling them. They immediately fell, and Elias made his way to the last VIP booths. There, he opened the curtain, seeing Rudy holding Glitter hostage.

"Hey, Elias. Long time no see."

Elias stood there, fully quiet, still pondering to himself.

"Rudy Judd…Most disgusting piece of shit I've ever met. Even worse than myself."

He pressed his handgun harder against Glitter's skin, leaving a red mark with the shape of the pistol's barrel.

"How about you back the fuck away or I'll paint a Picasso pastiche with the very few little brains this bitch has left, hm?"

Glitter, still immobilized by Rudy's arm, pressed against it, trying to nail her way out.

"P-Please…Please, help me…"

She barely seemed to be paying attention to the demon right in front of her. She was able to accept any help she could get.

"TALK TO ME, ELIAS! WHAT THE FUCK IS INTO YOU? WHY ARE YOU AFTER ME?! TRYING TO COLLECT SOME SINS? I TOOK CARE OF YOU, YOU UNGRATEFUL ASSHOLE. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU. I GAVE YOU A JOB, A ROOF ON TOP OF YOUR FUCKING HEAD. I GAVE YOU A DIRECTION. YOU COULD'VE LIVED A GOOD LIFE!"

Elias took a step forward, quickly taking Rudy's handgun away from Glitter, aiming it against his own head. Elias stared at him from inside his caprine skull.

"Shoot, Rudy. Let's see who dies first."

Rudy pressed the handgun against Elias's head.

"MOTHERFUCKER!"

He squeezed the trigger with all strength. The bullet came out of the barrel and immediately ricocheted back to his own forehead, piercing his cranium and lodging into his brain, killing him on the spot. As Elias kneeled on his sin contract and absorbed it, his caprine form started reverting itself. His withered skin turned back to normal color and texture, his claw-like nails went back to usual, and, mostly, his caprine skull started dissolving into bonedust and the very few mass he had before the transformation was suddenly back. He fell to his knees, totally exhausted.

"Hey, HEY!"

Glitter exclaimed, jumping over Rudy's corpse, rushing towards Elias. As they made eye contact, Elias passed out. He woke up inside his own twisted mind room again, seeing a naked Anna with a broken neck. They were both sitting in his room, watching as the young Elias smiled, playing with Jonah.

"In the end, it was worth it, huh?"

Elias stands up, forcing out a little smile.

"What was worth it? Living?"

Anna looks at him, forcing her neck.

"Trying. Trying for those who care."

Elias looks at Anna, confused.

"But no one cares."

She smiles, letting out a small gush of blood.

"Well, do you?"

Elias finally lets out a smile, staring at himself in the reflection of a nearby window.

"Yes. I care."

Anna holds his hand, as the surrounding room starts undoing itself.

"Then, in the end, it was worth caring."