EVERY LAST ONE

LIAM'S POV

I wake up sweating profusely. I haven't had much sleep since Dante and I paid a little visit to the director. I thought I could deal with it. I thought I could deal with killing those people but I can't. I thought I could be as strong as Dante is but right now, after realizing just how many people Dante has killed, I can't help but think about how he sleeps at night with all the souls he has drained of life.

I know we went for the director. I know he was awful person and I know he deserves what was coming at him. I know he deserved to die. But those other men we killed, they had nothing to do with erotica. They were just guarding their boss and we killed them and Dante, he acts like nothing happened.

I can't even blame him because he is used to this life. I am not him and he is not me. I can't expect him to react the same way I am when this is the first time I am doing something for the first time and now I feel like a fucking criminal. I feel like a monster and I can't take this guilt anymore. I feel like it's eating away at my soul. I dream about the people I killed and I keep having this sense of paranoia that I'm going to get caught.

Imagine the headlines that something like this will cause. Liam Mathews, the well renowned lawyer arrested for murder of FBI agents. I'll go to jail for life. It'll ruin my life forever.

"Are you okay?" I jump as Dante walks into my room with a frown on his face. He folds his arms across his chest and leans against the wall. He doesn't look well slept either but I know it's not because he killed people. It's because of Adeline.

"I'm fine. Just really tired, you know. I can't wait for all of this to be over." I say honestly avoiding his gaze because I don't want him to see the look on my face. He's already worried about so much right now and I don't want to add to it. I don't want to be a burden on top of the many ones he already has. I don't want him to think I'm weak.

"You're not fine actually." He says with a raise of his brows. "You look like shit actually." He says with a scoff. I look over to him and smile lightly as I shake my head. There's no need hiding from him. Dante can see through me as clear as day, he can see through anyone. I'm sure he already knows what's bothering me. I want to talk about it because it's eating at my soul but I don't know where to start. I can't play victim because I knew exactly what I was doing when I pulled the trigger that killed all those men yet I did it anyway and now I'll have to face the consequences whether I like it or not.

I have to be strong.

"You don't have to hide it you know." Dante says, his expression changing from playful to serious in an instant.

"I'm not trying to hide anything." I say dismissively. "I just really need a bath." I rise from my bed and shove my hands in my pocket as I walk towards the window. I push the blinds aside gently and a ray of sunshine falls upon my bed. I can't help but think about a young Adeline. When we were just kids, she would always wake me up, so we could sit on the roof of her room and watch the sunrise and sunset together. It was beautiful. Even with all the problems she had with her family, she always managed to see life form such a beautiful angle.

I think about Naomi. The way I would always wake up to the sunshine illuminating her features in the morning. It was one of the things that kept me going with having such a demanding job. I almost lost Naomi. I just got her back and I lost her all over again. I don't know if I'll ever survive if I lose her or Adeline completely. I'll lose my fucking mind knowing that I was incapable of helping.

"You killed people. That's not something that I shard to ignore. Have the nightmares started, the hallucinations, the paranoia? Have you started losing your mind and telling yourself you're a monster?"

I snap my head at him and furrow my brows. Thinking about the fact that Dante must have gone through all of that too is a little bit unbelievable to me. He looks so strong, so calm and so always kept together.

"Did you go through that?" I ask him.

"I'm not an animal Liam." He says with a smile walking closer to me. He takes a seat on my bed and rests his elbows on his knees as he averts his gaze towards me.

"I'm human and I go through things too. Killing someone, it's hard. Even though you think they deserve it, at the end of the day, they're human too and you just took a life. It fucks you up. It messes with you and I want you to know that you don't have to go through that alone."

"Do you still feel that way sometimes? Does it still mess with you?" I ask him.

"Of course it does." He laughs. "You would have to be a monster or a fucking psychopath if murdering someone doesn't make you question at least one thing about yourself. You don't have to pretend like you're okay." He says genuinely.

"Then how do you do it?"

"I've been doing this for a very big part of my life. I've come to terms that that is the kind of person I am. I chose this life. I knew what I was getting myself into. But you, Liam, you're not a killer. You don't have to be." He says.

"I don't know how else I can save Adeline and Naomi without pulling a few triggers." I say with a low tone. It's something that is hard to admit. All the people of erotica deserve to die but I know killing that many people will ruin me.

"You don't have to kill anyone if you don't want to. You can just back me up and I'll do all the shooting."

"No." I say after thinking about it for a while. Dante raises his brow at me as I speak. I walk closer to him and take a seat right next to him.

"It's Adeline Dante. It's Naomi. It's my best friend and the love of my life. I'll do anything for them. I'll burn the whole world down if that means I get them back and I'll kill as many people as I have to if that means I can bring them home safe. I'll pull as many triggers even if it means I turn into a psychotic killing machine. They're both worth every effort it would take me to pull those triggers."

Dante stares at me with surprise in his eyes but I can also see a hint of admiration.

"That's cool." He says as he takes out a piece of gum from his pocket and pops it in his mouth. He smiles at me and I feel a sense of brotherhood I haven't felt with anyone else before. I don't have a lot of male friends, not because I don't trust people but because my friendship with Adeline is all I have ever known. I felt complete with her and Naomi in my life. I didn't need anyone else.

But now, with Dante, I feel like I have found a brother in him. So many things have gone wrong and I used to blame him. I used to blame and judge him so much for the kind of person he is but now, after going through exactly what he has gone through, I understand why he is the way he is.

I understand why he has had to do certain things and I cannot judge him anymore because I have killed too. I'm in the same boat as him here.

"Did you ever get justice for your sister?" I suddenly blurt out. I feel the atmosphere in the room suddenly change as soon as I ask him the question. I know it's a sensitive topic and I hope it's okay that I brought it up.

"You know I'm doing all this for her." Dante says. "I was broken when I found out what happened to her. I couldn't just sit by and go on with my life after finding out what I did about erotica. After finding out that there is an entire organization that preys on little girls like my sister. I couldn't ignore it and I just knew that I would have to do something about it."

"Were you ever scared?" I ask him.

"Of course." He laughs and falls to his back on my bed, taking a deep breath as he closes his eyes.

"I kept asking myself how I was going to do it. I started with training myself. Building up my strength. Improving on my fighting skills till I was sure no one in this world would eb able to win me in a fight. And then I started practicing with weapons, making sure that once I had a target, I would eliminate them as efficiently as possible."

"That must have been draining." I say with a deep sigh.

"It was. I mean it still is but here we are." He says with a shrug. "But we fight every day you know and we never stop. At least I know I'll never stop. Not until every single one last of them is dead."