Left alone in awkward silence

[Monday, Morning - School Library]

Most Sixth Formers won't bother coming in if they have no lesson. Most people will just stay at home and chill. However, Simon decided it would be nice to go in for a change. He could get some studying done and leave at around lunch. He thought it wasn't a bad deal. He would be able to focus by himself. Except, he wasn't the only one with a Monday morning off.

"Ah, Kaylee," Simon said awkwardly sitting down opposite her.

"Oh, Simon. Didn't know you were coming in?"

"M-me neither."

Kaylee carried on with her work whilst Simon watched her closely. He forgot to blink a few times making it rather awkward for those around them.

"Are you ok?" Kaylee asked Simon who had forgotten how to breathe.

"Ah!" he exclaimed. "Yes. I'm fine." Simon replied as he pulled out his books from his bag.

The library was as silent as a library should be. There were the usual amount of students trying to study. Except, none of them knew what they were doing. They hoped to read the same page over and over again in hopes that something suddenly happens. Either, they die and miss out on exams or become a genius, it was really a gamble with these studies.

"H...Hey," Simon said. "Have you got a pen?"

Of course, Simon has a pen, he wasn't stupid. He kept about 10 in his bag, but this was part of a master strategy to get Kaylee to talk to him.

She reached into her pencil case with a visible look of disgust. It wasn't like Kaylee to push someone away, perhaps it was Simon's constant pushing that annoyed her, maybe she just wanted to be left alone.

"Have you got any paper?" Simon asked.

Again, Kaylee grabbed 100 sheets out of her bag and threw them at Simon who collected the scattered sheets with a smile.

"Um. Have you got-"

"Enough," Kaylee said. "What do you actually want to ask?"

"Why did we break up?" Simon said without hesitation.

There it was, Simon's final stage in his master plan. He skipped most of the steps but made it to the goal regardless. He would receive bad marks for not showing how he got there but he got the answer so he gets one mark.

Kaylee sat and sighed as she looked towards Simon with barely a smile.

"I didn't think it was fair for you," Kaylee said.

"That's what you said before, but what does that mean?"

"Look, just leave it ok. Can we just work? In SILENCE?"

"Fine," Simon said as he proceeded to write loudly. The scribbling from his pen bounced around the room, but no one cared as they were too absorbed in their books. Except for the person closest to the source, who was being tortured by the constant breaks in sound.

"Alright!" Kaylee screamed grabbing his hand to stop him from writing. "I'll tell you."

"Thank you."

"But I want you to accept it. Whatever I tell you, you have to accept."

"Very well."

"I broke up with you because I wasn't sure how I felt about you. We only went out for several months, at first I thought I had feelings for you, but I was just lonely. I wasn't sure what any of it meant. I felt as if I was leading you on, the same goes for everyone. I feel as if I have feelings, but I can't understand it, I feel like I'm just using them because I'm lonely."

Simon sat in silence with his pen jabbed into the side of his leg.

"I see," Simon said. "I figured it was something like that."

"I'm sorry. It's just that, It's nothing wrong with you. I've been making excuses my whole life, even recently I've been running away. The problem is me."

"I understand," Simon said standing up. "I wish that we can stay friends."

"Of course," Kaylee said.

Simon walked off but didn't go to any room in particular. He instead walked around the school looking into all the classroom. In the top floor of the school, he walked passed the science labs and saw Ethan sitting alone resting his face in his hands. He didn't look happy but he didn't look sad. He just sat thinking about whatever came to his mind, staring at the board in front of him.

"I don't understand," Simon said to himself.

"What about?" Lily said appearing from nowhere, despite being in a bright jumper.

"Oh… um… just nothing."

"I see…" Lily responded as she slowly covered her arms. "Well, I'll be off then."

Lily walked off with a smile on her face, almost skipping down the empty hall.

"What a strange girl," Simon said.

"What are you doing?" Ethan said poking his head out the door.

"Ah, no...nothing."

"Hmmm," Ethan said suspiciously. "Whatever."

"Yeah, sorry. Don't mind me." Simon said as he was about to leave.

"Hey," Ethan called out. "Are you ok?"

"What? Y-yeah. Of course, I am. Don't worry about me. Go back to your lesson."

"What a strange guy," Ethan said before closing the door.

Simon walked until he reached the sixth form common room and sat alone in a room full of revising students. It was as if he was back in the library except it wasn't silent. He felt as if he was standing on a chair, with everyone looking at him. He proceeded to rest his face on the table as he pulled out the books he shoved into his bag from earlier.

"Sigh," Simon said as he dragged his pen across his sheet of paper.

The sixth form life isn't an easy life. Love isn't guaranteed no matter how old you are. Everyone wishes to have a happy ending. An ending to their story where they find the love they were after all along. Except, not everyone will. Love is different for everyone, no one can predict who you'll fall for. It's a losing game, you just have to put up with it.