Thought-3-Work

I always thought I didn't have a work ethic, I didn't have the will to get things done. It took me a long time to realise that I just don't have the will to carry out my dreams. I work long hours 6 days a week into the night, yet I have no problem doing it.  When it comes to starting a project that I am passionate about I fall apart.

The voices in my head just tell me that it's not meant to be, no matter how hard I try never be good enough.  I tried drawing, singing, and writing most obviously.Yet no matter what I do I can't seem to keep it together. My work ethic is just fine, I just don't have enough will to follow my actual passions.

Is this all Im meant to do, work to the day I die because I'm too afraid to start on the path my dreams. It's not even about going anywhere with it, it's just about having something outside of work. I don't care if I don't become famous, that was never the point. I just want to be able to express by self through these arts without immediately judging myself.

But I have been told that the plight of an artist, Their biggest critic is none other than themselves.  So I have to stop being afriad of myself.  Maybe the 1st step isn't through my art, maybe I can just start with a new routine. Commit myself to something, otherwise what's the point. I don't have any profound statements, just a reminder at how useless life is without something to call yours. How useless it is to live life without someone to call you their's.