Zhao Ding Meets Ling Hua

"You, just how old are you right now?" asked Shensheng.

"2356 this year. You-You don't see a wrinkle do you? That's impossible, I've been using Zhao Clan's Miracle Anti-Aging Toner for several years now."

The Devine Pig passed over a letter. "Junior, read this first. It's from your older self."

"My older self? Later, there's something more important, first."

Shensheng's eyes glared like giant red saucers.

What could be more important than reading a letter from yourself?

Finding her travel sack, Mu Huizhong started pulling out items. First was her coffee brewing set. Humming, she said, "Coffee is the life, Coffee is the blood."

Seeing the coffee, the Divine Pig remembered the sweet Kaffe she had the other day. "This Queen recalls you can make a sweet Kaffe."

Mulling as she was brewing, Mu Huizhong, "Heh! You still prefer your coffee that way?"

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever Master talks about Little Hussy, he eventually discusses you. Usually about how you used to force people to make you Sweet Joe and numerous headaches..."

Shensheng snorted, "Sweet Joe, how come the name keeps changing?"

"Because of the confusion. Master called it coffee while Little Hussy called it kaffe. To avoid confusion, they decided the one true name would be joe."

"This addles the brain!" Pattering left to right, Shensheng demanded, "You just make it right now!!"

"Busy!"

Shensheng started floating the air. About her, spatial distortions starting vibrating with the pressure of her aura. The Divine Pig was about to unleash an innate skill when she saw something that bamboozled her.

Mu Huizhong pulled out a large body pillow. On it was sewn the face of a handsome young man.

"Cutie Master, how are you this morning?" asked Mu Huizhong to the pillow.

"Master, Wife will have your coffee ready before you wake up." Pulling out a set of undergarments and robes, Mu Huizhong started to blissfully sniff the garments.

Releasing her aura and lowering to the floor, Shensheng said, "Junior, just what are you..."

Mu Huizhong abruptly glared, "Don't you dare interrupt my morning time with Master!"

Shensheng pattered back in shock.

Returning her attention to the clothes, Mu Huizhong said, "Master, like everyday you smell divine...this Maid..."

Suddenly, Ling Fan entered the chamber. Seeing Shensheng, she asked, "What's going on?"

In his new courtyard, Tian Cai was pacing about with his hands crossed behind his back. Unable to rest, he actually had been walking about all through the night.

Screams erupted from the Ling Clan

"Little Hussy! DIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!"

BOOM!

You dare!!"

THOOM! The ground shook with massive pressure as two giant auras clashed.

"Divine Transporter!!"

"AAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

Just as quick as the clashes occurred, the fight ended.

With wide eyes, Tian Cai was about to run over to the Ling Clan when the Divine Pig came zooming by. With a thud, she threw down the younger Mu Huizhong and a glass jar. In the glass container buzzed a fly."

Looking at the jar in shock, Tian Cai asked, "Teacher, you-you didn't?"

With a squealing snort, Shensheng said, "Little Genius the woman's psycho...you-you keep her a way from my Disciple, or next time you can scrape her carcass off of a wall. For the next hour or so, let her know what life is like as a fly."

Swoosh!

Shensheng returned as quickly as she arrived.

Dumbfounded, Tian Cai carefully picked up the jar. "Miss Mu...this? How about this Young Master take care of you for a bit?" Pausing, he scratched his head. "We just can't have your body lying about, so don't mind my servants as they move you to your Elder Sister's room."

Mu Huizhong was buzzing about frantically. Rather than being emotionally distraught about her predicament, she was in fact extremely excited.

Ahwwwwww! That's Master at 5 years old?….He's so adorable...Little Cutie, Wife is here!!

After asking servants to move Mu Huizhong's body, Tian Cai sat by the wall to the Ling Clan. On a table was the coffee brewing kit that Mu Huizhong had left for him. Also on the table was the jar with Mu Huizhong. Unbeknownst to Tian Cai, her face was actually voluntarily stuck to the glass as she stared at him with starry eyes.

Waa! Wife can see every inch of your beautiful eyes.

The rich aroma of the brewing coffee starting rising and quickly filled the air. Tian Cai sighed in bliss.

No matter the dimension, no matter the universe, everyone should wake up to such bliss.

Next door in the Ling Clan, Ling Fan was groggily staring into the morning air. The back of her brain felt extremely heavy. Before her was the blackest and most bitter of teas. With a severe lack of interest she looked at the cup.

Must I drink this yet again?

Suddenly, the rich aroma of coffee reached her nostrils and Ling Fan trembled uncontrollably.

This!!!

As though she was floating, she sniffed about as her nose led her to the wall. As the aroma became denser, Ling Fan's eyes popped wide like saucers.

Reverting to the 28 year old voice of her past life, she said, "Oy! Oy! Who's over there?"

On the other side of the wall, Tian Cai looked up.

Did his ears hear right? Someone was actually calling him from next door?

"You, the one brewing Kaffe! I'm calling you!"

Peculiarly, the person's voice didn't sound like they were from the Third Chaos Heaven.

Remembering the instincts of his past life, Tian Cai changed his voice to that of his 40 year old past self.

It better not be a damn prankster. If it's a f*cking telemarketer, they'll die.

"I don't know who's calling, but go away. I certainly don't know you," said Tian Cai. Looking about, he was getting ready to call out the Shadows.

"I smell the Kaffe from here. I'll buy some."

Tian Cai shifted, "Kaffe?"

"Stranger, what I'm brewing is my morning coffee. There are two things I don't share. My coffee and IM Account...oh my cell number...ah my email...my age…."

Ling Fan frowned.

Wasn't this much more than two things?

"….oh my weight."

Gritting her teeth, Ling Fan said, "That coffee smells like kaffe too me. Who's asking to share? Can't I just buy some?"

"Hell no! This is the last of my supply."

Ling Fan's eyes constricted.

The last of his supply!! Sh*t!

At this point, Ling Fan thought she and Fierce Fairies would need to launch a raid. However she imagined her two bosses. Wouldn't her idols, the two strongest women she'd ever known across two life times be disappointed?

Ling Fan decided to change tactics.

"Sir, please...I'm only desperately seeking a cup of kaffe. Would you believe it's been six years since my last cup? At that time, I remember spitting it out thinking it wasn't qualified to be kaffe. But now, now I'd give an arm to have that cup back."

Tian Cai hissed.

Six years! Hadn't it been a 5 year wait for him? Poor, poor soul.

"Sir, can you understand my plight?"

Clearing his throat, Tian Cai said, "What's your name? I don't recall a foreigner visiting the Ling Clan."

This?

Twiddling her fingers, Ling Fan said, "I'm a very distant relative and was recently recruited as a maid for Young Miss. My name is Ling Hua. Sir, what's your name?"

This?

"Ah Ding, I'm Zhao Ding, Little Brother Tian Cai is my cousin."

Nodding, Ling Fan said, "So it's like that."

"May I ask what your age is?"

"Soon, I'll be 29 years old."

"Ah, I'm 45."

Ling Fan gritted her teeth.

He had to be older even then my old self!

"Well Sister Ling, since you are a coffee aficionado, just once I'll share my pot of coffee with you. Hope you don't mind that it's medium roast. As I said, supplies are low and the medium is the most abundant," said Tian Cai.

Unconsciously, Ling Fan jumped into the air with raised fists.

Crying with a heavy heart, Tian Cai murmured softly in pain has he open the bag of medium roast beans and started to brew another pot.

Unbeknownst to him, Ling Fan broke into her secret funky victory dance. Coincidentally, her secret dance was similar to Tian Cai's own victory routine and they shook their rears in the same way.*1

Just then, recovering from her hangover, Tang Xifeng strode out of her room to enjoy the morning sun. While stretching she just happened to witness Ling Fan's shaking her butt in the air.

Oh heavens what are my eyes seeing this morning? How come no one warned her of the Young Miss's unique behavior. Just the other day, wasn't she scratching that Pig's butt?

Tang Xifeng turned about and decided it was best to sleep some more.

After a moment, Ling Fan straightened her ruffled robes. "Sir, you are the kindest soul Ling Hua has ever met.

Seeing that Tian Cai was brewing another cup, Mu Huizhong started buzzing about with excitement.

Master, are you really brewing a cup for this maid!!

Upon hearing Ling Fan, Tian Cai said, "Not long ago, I was in the same predicament. Back then it had been five years since I last drank my cup of coffee. I'm not a cruel person. I absolutely can't let another aficionado suffer like I did."

Ling Fan's eyes dilated.

There was such a coincidence.

"Also, I have to ask, do you drink your coffee black or with cream or sugar? I prefer mine black so I don't have cream or sugar on hand."

Astonished at yet another coincidence. Ling Fan, "Black, I only drink my kaffe black. Sir, you-you may be the brother from another planet I never had."

Tian Cai scratched his head. Didn't Shensheng, The Divine Pig say the same thing to him previously?

Sighing in wonder, he said, "Miss Ling, indeed. Who'd believe that two distant relatives, neighbors would both like coffee and drink it black?"

Ling Fan rested her back against the wall. "Big Brother, where in the Chaos Heavens are you from? It's a miracle they have kaffe. I'll ask our Ling Family merchants to travel there and procure as much kaffe as possible."

"If only it was that simple?"

"What do you mean?"

"My supply was in fact given to me by another from Ninth Heaven. However, I'm told the coffee isn't native there. The coffee was originally purchased from a mysterious merchant that no one knows how to contact. At most, I have 26 days left of coffee."

Ling Fan stiffened.

This was it, the last of all the kaffe in the world?

Immediately, her heart trembled and tears welled up into her big brown eyes.

Was life worth it without no coffee?

Tian Cai continued, "When I heard this news, truthfully I-I wanted to end myself. How could there be any life without coffee? But that same person, that person who brought me the coffee also saved my life."

Ling Fan stared at the wall as though she was peering through to the other side.

How was she and this person circumstances so similar?

"How-How so?" she softly asked.

"That person also had coffee tree seeds. Right now, I'm attempting to grow my own trees. Although I found the perfect growing environment, I know zero about growing trees. In fact, today, my plan was to go out and recruit an expert."

This!?

Abruptly, Ling Fan stood up.

"Brother Zhao, Ling Clan is a merchant family. I'm sure if we use all our contacts, Ling Clan can find a tree expert. In fact, I can go ask the Young Miss right now."

This!?

Tian Cai's eyes brightened like two blazing suns. "Sister Ling, you would really do this?"

"Mhm!! Shouldn't fellow aficionados help each other? Won't I suffer like you if there is no more kaffe in the world? This is only helping myself."

"Sister Ling, if you do this then I can only designate you as my official tester."

"Tester?"

"In the coffee world isn't this just free coffee? Basically you help me test the various roasts."

"You know how to roast kaffe beans?" asked Ling Fan in amazement.

"Isn't it similar to roasting nuts?"

"It can't be that simple?"

"If your only doing small personal batches, then yes its that simple."

This!

Ling Fan was filled with wonder. Excitedly, she said, "I'll go ask the Young Miss right now!"

"Sister Ling wait. Momentarily, I'll send a servant to the broken portion of the wall. Please have someone there to bring you your coffee."

"Mhm!!!" gleefully responded Ling Fan, running off.

Tian Cai clapped his hands.

Surprisingly, things were coming together rapidly.

Pouring out a cup of fresh coffee, Tian Cai called over a servant to take it over. All this happened in the matter of seconds, but to Mu Huizhong, it was a nightmare. Originally, when she first saw Tian Cai pour out the coffee, she assumed it was for her. Feeling like her heart was going to fly out of her chest, she was happily buzzing about until the moment she saw Tian Cai hand the cup over to a servant.

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Ling Fan was running in an unknown direction until she realized something.

Wasn't she the Young Miss?

She skidded to halt and quickly commanded a servant to meet the Zhao Clan servant. While she waited, she paced back and forth.

Wasn't it taking too damn long!

With a huff, she was about to run out when the servant returned. On a delicate tray, was a steaming cup of kaffe. All kinds of joy filled Ling Fan's face. Breathing heavily, she gingerly took the cup. With a hand, she fanned the rich aroma, smiling blissfully in pure joy.

Finally she took a sip.

Like electricity, the flavor erupted like sparks in Ling Fan's brain. Unknowingly, an icy sound cracked and the faint lines of a domain flickered faintly about Ling Fan.

Eyes wide as saucers, she stared at the cup of kaffe, amazed that kaffe in another dimension could taste so good. In a huff, she walked while running back to the wall.

"Brother Zhao! This Kaffe! It's the best!" she yelled over the wall.

However, in response was only silence.

"Brother Zhao?"

Earlier, the fly jar had actually burst and from his manor, Tian Cai heard a scream. He was about to run in when he remembered his coffee. While looking at the open steaming cup, he realized an important small detail.

There were no travel mugs in this world.

Hearing another scream, he gritted his teeth and one-shot the hot coffee. Wincing in pain, he roared as he ran into the manor.

He found Mu Huizhong walking about in a huff. Sensing his arrival she looked up with bright green eyes.

Tian Cai sighed, feeling like he was looking at glittering emeralds.

Her eyes are pretty, however, they just a little short compared to her Older Sister. Beauty, where you?

Clearing his throat, he said, "You are Miss Mu Huiqing, Huizhong's little sister?"

Huiqing? Who's that?

"Miss Mu, you may not be aware, but Zhu Shensheng brought you here on the request of your older sister. As your sister's betrothed, of course you may stay here at our Zhao Clan as long as you need."

Betrothed? What does he mean betrothed?

Suddenly, Mu Huizhong remembered Shensheng had passed her a letter from her older self.

"Master, let this one read a letter from my sister first," she said. Quickly pulling out the letter, she turned to read it.

"Miss Mu, no need to refer me as such. As your Elder Sister's betrothed, please refer to me as Brother-in-Law."

What did my older self do!?

Mu Huizhong gasped several times as she read the two page letter.

She gave a long deep look to Tian Cai.

Clearing her throat, she said "Mu Huiquing greets Brother-in-Law. Forgive me for being blunt, however this one needs to know. How-How much do you care about my older sister?"

Surprised by the question, Tian Cai looked away.

"Ah your sister...Beauty she-she saved me. May I ask a question? Her eyes are always sad, as though she carried deepest of sorrows. Do you know why? In the future, Brother-in-law, hopes to relieve this pain of hers."

"You-You care so deeply for my Older Sister?" asked Mu Huizhong.

"Mhm."

Unbeknownst to Tian Cai, Mu Huizhong's eyes bugged out and she crumpled the paper. For the first time in her life, Mu Huizhong actually hated someone more than Little Hussy, Ling Fan. She imagined her older self. How was she able to to do what the current Mu Huizhong had spent centuries trying to do? MHM!!!??

That Whore!!!