Salad_Adressing

James was a very popular online male model with millions of admirers, he dies a hilarious death in the shower, the god of reincarnation thought it was hilarious and reincarnated him into an old man who is a teacher, as a gift the god of reincarnation sent him the "Old Man Teaching System" How is he to adapt?!

System: Host must teach the children like an old man would!

James: What? Okay, the square root of-

System: No! Explain it like an old man!

James: ???

Follow his daily life of being an old man, doing things ranging from tending to his garden, protecting his lawn from children, and teaching annoying teens.

Old Man Teaching System?!

"Yes? What do you want?" The rich old man asked the HOA member without even a tinge of fear.


"Ah, yes. Mr. Henderson. In accordance with section 54Y of the HOA handbook, you have violated 2 different offenses and we were notifying you that we will be fining you the longer you do not resolve this. If you choose to resolve it now, there will be no fine." The HOA member recited as if it was memorized to his heart.


"What are you blabbering about? I didn't break no code!" Mr. Henderson said as he was clearly in denial.


"The first offense is owning a gargoyle statue and showing it off outside. The second offense is having these shrubs be so overgrown!" The HOA member spilled the tea. The old man wasn't happy about this...


"YOU WANT ME TO GET RID OF MY GARGOYLE? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I PAID FOR THAT THING? NO, YOU'RE NOT TAKING MY GARGOYLE, UNDERSTAND ME? BLABBERMOUTH!" Mr. Henderson suddenly shouted.


"I never said anything about taking it sir.. You can display it within your home, just not in your yard! There is a number of reasons for this!" The HOA member attempted to explain but Mr. Henderson wasn't having any of it.


"You tell those DORKS sitting in their office chairs at the HOA that they're not moving my Gargoyle! This is a family heirloom that I find precious and want to show it off due to this fact! Now get going!" Mr. Henderson continued to be aggressive to get his point across, but he unknowingly became too hostile for this HOA member's liking.


"HE'S GONNA ATTACK ME! SOMEONE, HELP!" The HOA member shouted out as he grabbed pepper spray from his pocket and pepper sprayed the old man!


The old man began to scream in pain as he fell to the ground! "AHHHH MY EYES!!" The old man couldn't bear the pain and began to shout for someone to call the ambulance.


The HOA member turned to leave and escape the situation, but just as he did the old man got up and punched the HOA member in the back of the head!


Mr. Henderson smiled at the HOA member who was about to fall to the ground unconscious! But.. the HOA member didn't fall unconscious.


"Did you just punch me or tap me? I can't tell." The HOA member was genuinely curious. The old man's fist was wrinkled and severely lacking. He didn't feel a thing in all honesty.


Mr. Henderson ran inside and locked his door in response to this. He didn't have anything he could say or do without making the situation worse..


The HOA member left and planned on coming back in a few days.. If there was no change to what he had pointed out he was going to write this old man a hefty fine..


James arrived home with seeds in his pocket. A packet of tomato seeds, rose seeds, and catnip seeds.


While he didn't really have a reason to have the catnip as he only had a dog known as Mr. Porkbelly, he could maybe happen upon some cats and have the nip ready to go!


James smiled as he grabbed some tools and began to plant the seeds sporadically around his yard. The thought never occurred to him that he may have a cat break into his yard, get high off the catnip, devour his tomatoes, then eat the rose petals. But, he would soon learn the next couple months that this would be a recurring theme..


A week later Mr. Henderson received a 5000$ fine in the mail courtesy of the HOA member..


Gardening 3