Chapter 8

"Anko-nee-chan!"

Shiro called as he approached the Dango shop.

He'd already been to her apartment, and had bought Dango at one of her favorite shops, but, sure enough, when he finally found her she was at yet another Dango vendor.

Anko looked up, chewing on a bare stick. "Hey, Shiro!! I was beginning to think you were avoiding me!"

"Not big sister Anko!" Shiro replied, using his outgoing public persona. "I even brought you a present!" he added, holding up the two paper boxes with their sticks of Dango inside.

Anko brightened. "Hey, Kobayashi's! I've been meaning to go by there."

"Sorry, no severed heads or blood of the innocent today," Shiro said.

"Aww, you always know just what to get me. Thanks, Shiro. Now, what do you want?"

"Talk? Private?"

Anko gave him a measuring look and he gave her the boxes of Dango. Anko definitely felt she got the better end of the deal.

"Alright. The roof of my place, or inside?"

His eyes narrowed, and for a moment his serious self peeked through. "Inside," he said.

Anko's apartment was just like Shiro's room, except it had feminine clothing strewn here and there and looked like she hadn't picked up after herself in a week. He ignored it.

"Alright, whatcha got?" she asked without preamble, sliding one of the sweet treats of the stick with her tongue. After a moment's hesitation, she offered Shiro one of the sticks, but he shook his head.

"I've been studying personal interactions and how people relate to each other," he began.

Anko wrinkled her brow. "Which means?"

"I want to learn how to interact with people, mostly women, especially hyper-active girls"

A mad grin spread across her face, one that had nothing to do with the tasty tasty Dango rolling around on her tongue. She swallowed. "Aww, has little Shiro finally discovered girls?" she said in a cutesy voice.

She faked shock. "Don't tell me… you want to have," she gasped theatrically, "sex!?

"And you need me to tell you how to do it?! Aww, Shiro-Kun, I'm honored. Of course, big sister Anko will tell you ALL you need to know."

Shiro looked at her seriously. "I already know about sex. I read it in that Orange book, I got from that White hair ANBU"

She dropped the act with a moue of disappointment. "Yeah, Damh Kakashi, giving that garbage to innocent kids" She paused. "And damn you are hard to tease."

Shiro ignored her complaint. "For the longest time now, I've had a problem with people. And you know why"

Anko nodded, "Because of your Body right?"

Shiro nodded

"It's hard to fade into the background when someone clings at me for some reason," and here he let real irritation in his voice, "and no one will tell me why"

Anko smiled, "And that some is a girl?"

"Yes, I don't even know what her problem is?"

Anko grin, "Perhaps she likes you"

"Anko nee-san, I can't have any relationship with anyone, you know that right?"

Shiro said sternly

Anko grin turned into a serious frown

"Shiro, no matter what that bastard snake did to you, you have to let someone enter your life or you wil--

"I let someone touch my bare body, they will freeze to death... You know why I can't even hold hands with anyone right?"

Anko nodded. She know it, Outside ANBU, Hokage, and his Personal Doctor, She was probably the only person who knows about Shiro, and that too because she was Orochimaru Disciple in the end.

"Since I can't blend in, the only option left is getting out of the way"

Her frown got deeper, "You are asking me"

"Get me out of this team, I asked Grandpa Hokage, He said no"

"Then how do you think I could do that"

"You are my Official caretaker, as long as you give me written permission, with my bloodline, I could enforce the Law of the clan--

"Shiro"

Shiro tilted his head

"What is it?"

"I am not doing it"

"Why?"

"I am not pushing you into the darkness even more than you already are"

"They say that the hole in one's heart is filled by others around you"

"..."

"Then What about me?"

"..."

"Me, who can't touch without killing them, me who spent my entire childhood afraid that people might see my body, me who is always afraid people will call me a monster, me who feel pain every few seconds"

Shiro gets up, Knowing his wish can't be fulfilled here.

"I live in the darkness Nee-san, so darkness I become"

-------

The kunai sank two inches into the dense wood of the target log, and Shiro backflipped from the imagined attack, then drew another Kunai in a reverse grip and slashed across the log at head height for his imaginary enemy.

'Shiro you have to let someone enter your life'

whoose*whoose

Five Shurikens found their marks at the same time.

'There are people in this world who prefer solitude. But there is no one who can withstand it'

He grits his teeth and forces out his palm, releasing a wave of Freezing chakra that freeze the trees.

'Hey, hey, Shirrroooooooo'

'Ah, it's such a pity the more I think about it. I could have taken you as a little brother if you were born just a little late than me'

"LEAVE ME ALONE"

Shiro yelled in an empty space with no one to hear or say anything

*Badump

He fell to his knees.

He clenched his teeth and placed his hand above his heart. Through his clothes

He can not lose himself in emotions.

He stood again and resumed his training.

Unknown to him, his teacher, Yukimura Sensei was watching him from behind the trees.

-------

(Evening, Konoha Hospital)

"So How's your body lately", asked the Doctor who removed his glove after examination

"Not Great, It's hurting more and more"

"It's more painful?"

"Yes"

"Even after Jiraiya sama seal"

"Yes"

"Sigh... It's alright, we will ju--

"No need, It's not like you can cure me, I will just grind the pain"

"Shiro, as your doctor I highly recommend against it"

"I said it's alright, you can not cure me, and it's bringing me more pain instead of curing me"

"I can't allow that"

Shiro chuckled, "Why? Is it because it eventually proves you lesser than that Mad Bastard"

The Doctor frowned, "Shiro--

"Those who can't even acknowledge themself, aren't they called pathetic?"

"..."

"Don't you agree?"