Chapter 17

Aiko Mamoru moved the fan quickly, seeking air. In addition to the unbearable heat, he had been experiencing for the past few weeks, his headache was also rooted the night before. He did not understand how he had gone from a confession to Shin to a kiss on Jiro. He was deeply ashamed and angry with himself.

" Will Sakamoto-san have breakfast with us? " Midori asked.

He looked ahead and saw her, restless. None of the women were comfortable with Shin. However, what could he do? Throw him out? They were, at that moment, at the breakfast table, and Sakamoto had not yet appeared.

Aiko did not return to the room after Jiro left. That night, he fell asleep sitting in the tea room with a bottle of sake in his fingers. He blamed himself for the thoughtless act, but he was tired of being the right person when everyone else in the world was rotting in malice.

"I don't know," he replied.

Forcing him to put up with it after he had given Aiko such a rough ride was embarrassing, to say the least. However, Shin Sakamoto did not tend to care much about his unreasonable attitudes, so everything led him to believe that he would stay a few more days at Ai, forcing Mamoru to see him every moment.

" Aiko-san " Shiromiya appeared at the door, flustered. " Sergeant Saito wants to see you."

It was nine o'clock in the morning! God! Would n't have peace?

" Tell him to go, because Ai only opens at night."

Shiromiya blushed.

" But I already invited he in, Aiko-san."

Aiko sighed nervously. He felt the gaze of women on him as if pressing him. He got up.

"Send him to the tea room," he told Shiro. " I'm going to the bathroom to wet my face and soon I'll be there."

He just wanted some time to think about what to say. Aiko needed an argument that would put Saito out the door. However, he found none.

It was clear that Jiro's confession was a lie. Who would fall in love in such a short time? A handsome and experienced man like him would never be charmed by a brothel owner.

" A virgin owner of brothel," he added in thought, overcome with shame.

After washing his face, he went to the sergeant. Felt smelled it, a woody essence before he even saw his face. When Saito turned to him, he was amazed by the sharp guilty look that found him.

" I came to see you to apologize " Jiro stepped forward, even before greeting him.

Lifting his chin, Aiko crossed over and sat down at the table across from him.

" Continues. "

" I should never have imposed myself that way. I'm ashamed."

Aiko nodded.

" It's okay, we don't talk about it anymore."

Jiro raised his eyebrows.

"However," he continued, " I will make a point of talking to Sakamoto today. I will not act as a false friend, trying to steal your beloved."

" You are not trying to steal Shin from me " Aiko intervened, misunderstanding the placement. " We are not boyfriends, he refused me, did you forget? So, feel free to stay with him.

" Stay with Shin? I don't think you understand me, Aiko-san. I said last night that I fell in love with you."

" Yes, and today came to apologize."

" I didn't come to apologize for some lie. What I want is for you to apologize for the way I imposed my feelings on you. I will not try to kiss you when you are drunk. I will not abuse your trust. When love arises in you - and, believe me, it will - then all my actions will have consented. Until then, I will respect your limits."

Mamoru stared at him in awe.

" You really shouldn't be serious."

" I've never been more serious in my life. Until then, I never felt that way."

Mamoru persevered.

" You do not know me! You think you know me from the things Shin said, but the truth is, you don't know who I am!"

"I didn't say I loved you," Jiro replied. " I said I fell in love. Falling in love is the first step towards love. I am here, completely surrendered to you, willing to be what you want from me. And I am sure that this feeling will grow even more, and in a short time, it will be mutual."

" Why are you so sure?"

" Because we are both pieces of a battered heart, yearning to know happiness."

The words, at last, silenced Mamoru. He couldn't see a lie or a joke in Jiro. All he saw was a reflection of himself, before a Shin who did not want him.

"Forgive me," he finally asked.

"Aiko, I'm not asking you to correspond. Therefore, you should not apologize. " took a deep breath. "I'm here saying how I feel," he explained. " And saying that I will fight to awaken the same in you."

Saito stood up. It seemed to Mamoru that the conversation was over. But he couldn't let it go that way.

" Don't say anything to Shin, please."

" Are you worried about me? " Jiro smiled. " And you still think you don't feel anything for me?"

Mamoru sighed.

"I like you," he admitted. " The instant I saw you, I sympathized. I searched desperately for defects to point them out, but I didn't find them. I consider you a fascinating man, a kind and warm person. I am willing to be your friend."

" And that's what I want " Saito approached, holding his hands. " I am not imposing myself on you, nor do I want to force you to fall in love with me. I'm just communicating that I'm going to fight for you to love me. Shin had his chance for years, and he wasted it. It is only fair, therefore, that I have mine too."

Aiko watched his hands together. His heart warmed.

"Don't tell to Shin," he asked again. " I am not prepared to deal with his bouts of jealousy."

Jiro nodded.

" For now I will not say that I want the man he loves. But one day, I will speak " he warned. " Now I need to go."

Saito bowed before him and kissed his fingers. Aiko smiled.

***

" Did you notice how strange Aiko-san is? "

Shiromiya looked at Rika. Both were taking care of the garden. Their hands were covered with earth, and each had a small shovel, where they moved in the soft earth to put the flowers.

" Did you notice too? " Shiro was amazed. " I thought it was in my head."

"It's something that involves the handsome sergeant," Rika bet. " Because first Aiko didn't want to see he in the morning, and then Aiko left the tea room smiling."

" But Aiko-san loves Sakamoto-san."

Rika didn't even hear him while he was talking.

" Shin Sakamoto doesn't leave the bedroom. Midori went to bring him coffee and said his eyes are dull and lifeless. Her also said that he looks depressed and seems to cry ..."

" Sakamoto-san crying? " Shiro doubted.

"He's a crybaby," the other replied. " Do you remember when he was crying at the gate? The red nose? It looks the same."

" Ah, I want to see ..."

" Better not. Let Midori or Nana take the food. I'm afraid of him."

" Fear? Why?"

" And you ask me that? Have you forgotten what he did to you?"

Shiro shrugged.

" He said I'm now your friend."

" Shin told you that?"

" Yes, why? This is bad?"

Rika denied it.

" On the contrary, you are very lucky. Sakamoto is a monster, but he is extremely sincere. If he said that you are now his friend, he will protect and care for you, no matter how."

" As you know?"

" He only declared friendship to date to Aiko and Ryo and protected them in every way he could. It seems that he was close to that sergeant as well, which is why he was withdrawn from the war and returned to Japan.

Shiro looked impressed but soon turned his eyes to his chores. They were silent for a few seconds. Upset about it, Rika went on.

" Did something happen? You look sad."

Shiromiya swallowed.

" No " tried to appear indifferent.

Rika watched him for a few more seconds, and then changed the subject.

"I have another gossip for you," he clapped happily.

He turned his face to her, already curious.

" Do you know Ryo-san? " she asked, seeming not to remember that Ryo had spent several months visiting Shiromiya. "Mika been with him last night and ..."

AND?

Why were you listening to there? You should get up and run, avoiding things that hurt your heart.

" Ryo-san denied fire," she laughed.

Shiro narrowed his eyes.

" As well?"

"You know ..." She raised her index finger and then quickly lowered it.

Shiromiya tried to understand the gesture, without success.

" Ah, Shiro " Rika laughed, noticing the confusion. "Let's say his hot handle has cooled," she laughed.

Anything. No reaction from Kazue. Rika then took a deep breath and was clear.

" He didn't sleep with Mika. According to her, Ryo-san gave her money and then left the room, nervous. I think he became impotent sexual. Isn't it great? Well done!"

The female tone was mocking. Shiromiya didn't care. In itself, absurd happiness took over his entire body, invading his soul, overflowing in his eyes.

" Are you sure?"

" Of course yes. Mika showed the money Ryo gave to keep her quiet. " she laughed again. " Money thrown away, of course, she already told all the girls."

Suddenly, the world colored, and life seemed wonderful. He looked up, the sun shining brightly in the sky. It was the best summer of his existence.

"I'm going in," she warned, ending the gossip session. " I want to take a shower and get some sleep because the night will belong."

Shiro nodded.

"See you later," he said.

When she finally disappeared from his sight, he was able to smile as he wished, giving himself up to a loud and relieved laugh.

***

"After the Doolittle attack[33], it is hard to believe that we will lose this war " Kayo Tori laughed. " Americans are weak, they don't even know how far to go to bomb an enemy. It is no wonder that his soldiers were captured."

Ryo leaned his back on the chair, facing the man.

"In my opinion, no country in the world stands a chance against our beloved Japan," he lied, shamelessly. " We didn't lose a war ..."

"More than a thousand years ago," Kayo added, interrupting him.

Ryo nodded.

It was close to noon and he was in his Tokyo office negotiating the purchase of fishing nets and instruments with Kayo, who imported and sold at a reasonable price. They had been negotiating for years, but Ryo didn't feel willing to talk to him. He knew that Kayo was a tireless defender of the Empire and that he had already reported several members of the trade on account of his compromising opinions.

" Do you know a good place to have lunch?" The man asked, closing his briefcase and closing the meeting.

" Well, the best food in Tokyo is served at Ai. However, it is only open at night."

"But they say you have the owner's endorsement to go during the day," the other hinted.

Ryo found himself speechless. Then he just nodded and stood up.

The car took them to the neighborhood where the House of Love was located. Ryo even tried to think of arguments to avoid the confrontation but found none. The truth is, it was still too early for him to see Shiromiya after what he had done the night before. At least no one knew he hadn't been able to sleep with Mika.

There was no person at the gate, but luckily it was not locked. He looked ahead and everything seemed peaceful and calm, as always. He imagined how the environment could be that way since Shin Sakamoto was there.

" Ryo-san!"

The happy cry made him turn towards the garden. Shiromiya waved at him and laughed. It was beautiful, even completely dirty. His hands, grimy with red soil, held a rose seedling, which he promptly dropped on the ground as he ran towards it.

" I can't believe what I'm seeing ... " Kayo murmured, causing Ryo's attention to return to the man.

He tried to imagine what had caught his attention, but Shiromiya's haunted look as soon as he approached made it clear that they had both met before.

" Well, well ... " Kayo laughed, walking slowly with his eyes on the body of the child. " You are not so thin, nor so small, but you are still a piece of sin, eh?"

The shameless thing unnerved Ryo. He looked at Shiromiya, suddenly aware that Shiro had already been in Kayo's arms. He was already the second man who knew he slept with Kazue. Ryo became disgusted, he revolted, he needed all his high control not to lose his reason.

" So you left the streets for Ai? " Kayo asked Kazue. " Nice progress, isn't it?"

Ryo noticed Shiro's tearful look on him. He diverted yours.

"It was the cheapest fuck I've ever had," the man laughed, turning to Ryo. " It cost me a loaf and a fish. It was indeed shit, few times in my life I had someone so cold under me."

Ryo contained a strong tremor that took him over. He hated Kayo with all his might, but nothing compared to how he felt about Shiromiya. A futile one. A rotten person, without shame, without self-respect, without anything.

Ryo wanted to kill him ... And Ryo would kill him if he had any rights under him.

" Now it must be a little more expensive, right? " He approached Shiro and held him by the arm. " Even though it sucks in bed, its beauty is still desirable."

" Leave him."

Ryo's order made Kayo face him.

" He's just a street whore. " The other laughed, justifying himself.

" Does not matter. He's protected from Aiko Mamoru, so let him go."

" Protected or not, I still want to devour it ... " the laugh almost made Ryo vomit.

Why didn't Shiromiya defend herself? His sheepish look, filled with tears, looked ashamed and disgusted. But even then, he didn't take a step back. Suddenly Ryo realized that Shiro looked like a lifeless doll in front of him.

" I think you didn't hear! " A powerful voice interrupted them. " The boy is protected from this house and no one touches what belongs to Aiko."

The pair looked to the side, while Shiro remained with his eyes downcast. Then they saw a tall, strong man, wearing a kimono and holding a fat tabby in his arms.

" I touch whatever I want " the other one got angry. " Who do you think it is to give me orders? Simple security of a brothel? Or the owner, defender of a whore?"

The newcomer went down some stone steps and approached. He extended his free hand to Shiro and pulled him. Sheltered behind the big body, at last, Kazue breathed.

" Everyone who enters the House of Love is aware of its rules. If you do not know how to behave, you are not welcome " communicated.

Kayo laughed, looking at Ryo.

" That friend of yours Aiko is really brave. " Then he turned back to the other. " Do you know what I'm going to do with you?"

" No " the other replied.

" I'm going to send Kempeitai to invade this brothel, rape their bitches and bring this little whore to me. "

After the threat, there was silence. However, it did not last long.

" Kayo " Ryo intervened. " You're not talking to Mamoru Aiko. This one " pointed out the man with the cat "is Shin Sakamoto, the Emperor's beloved nephew, a member of the royal family, an officer in the army, and one of the leaders of Kempeitai."

Kayo Tori blushed quickly, while his whole life crossed before his eyes. The affront he committed could lead to his shooting or he could be deprived of his possessions.

"Sorry, " he knelt before Shin. " Forgive me, I would never have imagined ..."

"Get up," Shin said. " I hate people without self-pride."

The other rose quickly.

" Do you see the boy? " He pushed away the body, leaving Shiromiya on display. " If I know that you have been bragging about him, or that you have been trying to harm him, or if you have only tried to see him ... I will have him arrested. Then I will personally visit you in prison, carrying a broomstick with me. I'll tease your pants and stick the cable in your ass, not stopping until I see it coming out of your mouth. Am I clear?"

The man nodded.

"I didn't hear, you miserable," Shin roared. " Am I clear?"

" Yes sir!"

Shin smiled.

" Now withdraw to your insignificance. I never want to see you near Ai again, understand?"

" Perfectly, sir."

Without waiting for Ryo, the other ran away. The merchant still looked at the exit for a few seconds, apathetic at such a scene. Then he turned to Shin.

"I'm going too, Sakamoto," he said. " Maybe we can have lunch together sometime."

Shin realized that he was deliberately ignoring Shiromiya. He found it strange but accepted. He nodded and walked away. Ryo also started walking towards the gate, when a pair of hands held him tightly.

" Ryo-san " Shiromiya murmured. " I wanted to say..."

" Do not touch me! " Ryo pushed him, losing control. "I disgust you," he said cruelly. " You are dirty, rotten, vulgar ... I hate you! " shouted.

Shiromiya said nothing as saw him go. Anyway, reality hit him without mercy.

***

The sound of applause made him turn towards the door. Nana was there, clapping one hand against the other, in an ironic and sadistic attitude.

"I must congratulate you," she said, approaching. " So much so that, at last, you managed to become a faithful copy of Mamoru. " She handed the boy a cloth to dry his face. " Wipe away those tears, because it is not worth crying for what has no solution.

The old woman sat next to him on the futon. Shiromiya tried to stop the crying, but he came back, intensely. Sniffed with his face hidden in the fabric, trying to dry his face.

"I thought he ..." he started but was interrupted.

" That he what? Love you? Ah, spare me, Shiromiya Kazue. Men like Ryo don't love. And, if they come to love, it would be someone of the same strain, the same social class. You, me, the other girls and even Mamoru ... " she bit her lip, and then went on. " What are we? We are poor people who give thanks to Kami-sama because we have something to eat and where to rest our heads at night."

Shiro felt them.

" Your life priority is to have your own home, isn't it? I know you keep your money very hard and you have that dream. Do you know him? Just make more money than he already have and spend on trivia. " Nana noticed the crying coming back, and pulled him into her arms. " All prostitutes who fell in love, only suffered, Shiro. Because even if you are no longer a prostitute, you will always be someone who sold your body. So, cancel that feeling, put it somewhere inside you that you no longer find ..."

" I'll do it, Nana. Whoever has suffered from hunger knows that crying for love is silly " he laughed, still with tears falling.

Nana kissed without a face and left him. At that moment, at least, Shiro needed to mourn. Only the spiritual outburst that crying gave, could heal him and make him able to continue in his life.

***

" Go back to Hokkaido? " Tadao was surprised. " I thought business in Tokyo would continue ..."

" And why the hell would I do that? " Ryo roared. " My official residence is in Hokkaido, and I hate this damn Tokyo! " then he glared at the servant. " Why are you questioning me? You're just an employee. Pack everything, because I want to be home at night."

Tadao bowed and walked away. As soon as he was alone, Ryo allowed himself to scream.

What hate!

He had never felt anything like it.

Deep down, he knew it wasn't fair, always knew what Shiromiya was. But to know that other men had touched him ... to hear them boast about the nights they had Shiro ... was too much for him.

" I don't want to see him anymore," he said aloud, knowing he was lying.

He couldn't even imagine his days away from Kazue.