Secret out

The elephant was there in the room. The silence sat patiently in the living room, waiting for someone to chase it away.

I took a glance at the steam rising from my mug. I timidly raised my eyes only to have them collide with Miguel's. I instantly returned my gaze to my mug.

Miguel just stared at me calmly. "Do you not want to discuss it with me?" he asked.

I traced the mug's hand, lost in thought. I needed to tell someone close to my father and me about this. Logically, it should have been Alex because he was family and would understand the situation the best, but..

I lifted my eyes to meet Miguel. The person I wanted to lean on was him. Perhaps it was because I loved him? No, I wanted to because I love him.

"I-"

"You don't have to tell me if you are not ready. Do so only if you wish to, "Miguel remarked, then gently smiled.

I widened my eyes, and before I knew it a flood of tears flowed from them. Miguel fixed his gaze on me. He walked to my seat and sat quietly next to me, massaging my hair as he did so. He didn't say anything, which made me cry even more.

I rubbed the tears that wouldn't stop with repetition. "It stings, you know. All this time, I pondered what had caused my father to stop loving me so suddenly. For goodness sake, I was still his child! But now that I know, I feel betrayed, and I can't help but understand and despise him at the same time. To think that my father married a lady believing she was pregnant with his child only to discover the baby was his best friend's!"

"My mom knew it wasn't his but kept silent," I shook with anguish and wrath. She was poor, therefore she reasoned that it would be the perfect way to finally enjoy life! Still, she had no wish to have a child, so she intended to abort me and say she had lost the pregnancy while still having my father. Lies don't last forever. My father found out..."

I remained quiet, attempting to put my ideas into words. "My father's family was furious because she made a fool of them. They forced my mother to keep the baby in exchange for money, and she disappears silently.They didn't want the media to know about it. So my father was forced to raise a child who was not even his!" I sobbed.

"So, what happened to your mother?" Miguel questioned softly.

"She died giving birth to me. I guess she never got to enjoy the money they gave her," I replied bluntly.

I felt so empty. All this time I thought I was my father's child. All this time I thought that he loved me. How did he feel seeing the face of a child who resembled the woman who had betrayed him? Did my father even love her? He thought he conceived me during a drunk one-night stand at a club.

"I think all those tangible things he gave me were a substitute for the love he could never have given me," I murmured, looking up at Miguel. Searching, waiting for whether he would reject what I said. He stayed deafeningly silent.

I lowered my gaze. "To think that I was cocky to my step-siblings. We're not even steps or anything blood-related!" I yelled with a clenched fist.

Maybe seeing me at an abortion clinic reminded him of my mother. I became pregnant when I was young and met a man in a club.

"Do you think a person can only love a child they are related to? Do you believe that blood is thicker than water? "He inquired. I moved my head to look at him. He wore a solemn expression.

"No, but in my situation, my mother hurt and deceived him," I scoffed angrily.

Miguel smiled. "That doesn't mean he didn't fall in love with you. Yes, he gave you gifts and even shares, and yes, he disowned you, but he raised you. Are you saying that someone can pretend to love someone for 19 years?"

I considered it. I never had the impression that he didn't love me over those years.

"Do you believe dad wouldn't have disowned me if I were his biological daughter?"

"I don't know. Maybe he would, maybe, he wouldn't. Maybe what you did reminded him so much of your mom that all those feelings came back. Only he knows, Anastasia."

I remained silent. I hesitated but slowly wrapped my arms around Miguel.

"Thank you," I whispered against his chest.

"For what?" he asked, reciprocating the hug.

"For listening to me and giving comforting words. Basically, for everything."

"You're welcome then," he said with a chuckle.

So far, I have been lied to by Leo and my father. Two people who meant the world to me.

"Miguel?" I asked after a brief pause.

"Hmm?"

"Are you keeping something from me as well?" It was a gnawing sensation in my chest. I wished it would go away.

"Anastasia, won't you be late for work? "Don't you have the night shift?" he remarked.

"Shoot!" I yelled and dashed upstairs to get ready. I was about to be late!

I didn't notice Miguel deftly avoiding my question.

***

Miguel watched back Anastasia as she walked into the hotel. He stared at his hands, remembering the warmth of Anastasia's body and her scent. Miguel's heart increased at an alarming rate.

He closed his eyes and exhaled deeply.

He was in trouble. These moments would pass quickly. Miguel stared blankly at the sky before getting into his car and driving away.