Bad Times

Not all good days last forever and mine didn't last too.

I came home and thought about how perfect this day was. It wasn't particularly special with flowers and fancy foods.

It's just a simple day with a person who actually doesn't see me like everyone else does. Talking with William made me happy like I've never felt before.

I thought about school tomorrow, the end of middle school. I can't wait for high school. And then he's gonna graduate.

Will he stay in touch or was it the end? I thought to myself.

*notification sound*

Ray: So how did your date go?

Me: Good, like ahhh I can't believe, it was really fun.

Ray: Yeah go on a date with me too.

I laughed at his text.

Me: Nope, I won't lol.

Ray: Yeah you won't go out with a guy like me.

Me: *laughing emoji* Goodnight, we have our last class tomorrow. Gotta go early.

Ray: Yeah yeah whatever.

Me: *laughing emoji*

I laid down, thinking how he said he doesn't want to lose me. I really couldn't believe he said all those to me.

I fell asleep thinking about all this. I woke up in the morning and went to school as usual but just more happier then usual.

Ray wasn't here but Lara was there. Huh? Weird why's she so early. Then I saw both Talia and Mia standing in front of my class.

I thought something was weird but well they didn't come in so I didn't mind. I saw William coming down from the stairs, he was running.

What happened? I came out and stood in front of the stairs. I waved at him, he saw me but turned away. Huh? What?

"Will! Hey Will!" He didn't bother stopping. He came down and ran to Mia. What the actual fuck?

"Hey Mia, I'm sorry I'm late." He said. I stood there, listening and seeing him talking with them.

"Hey babe. It's okay if you're late. I know we talked till late night." Mia said and Lara and Talia laughed. "He loves you so much Mia, you can easily forgive him unlike someone." Lara said.

What? Are they referring to me? What happened? People started coming. Everyone would pass by and give me a look like I'm some garbage that was left here.

I didn't know what was going on. Ray wasn't coming. I went to my class and sat down. Nobody would be near me and some were looking at me, weirdly.

Ray ran to the class. I looked up at him. He looked at me and grabbed my hand. "Come, quickly." I ran down with him.

Stephan and Fabian was there. Fabian? He wouldn't usually talk with me but why's he here?

"What happened?" I asked them. "You really don't know?" Stephan crossed his arms and looked at me. "Come on Stephan, she might have had a reason." Fabian said.

"Someone leaked some of your pixelated nudes. They are pixelated but your face is visible." Ray said while sitting down in a corner. What? Wait what?

"Let me see." Ray took his phone out and showed me the pics. Wait, these are the pics when he forced me to send me those and Nate stopped talking.

I sat down. "Why'd he do that?" I blurted it out. "Who? Miles?" I don't know, who did this, why? Wait was William acting like this because of this? I can explain to him.

I ran to my class. He was still there, with them. I ran up to him. "Will, listen I can explain. I know you'll understand." He looked at me and then grabbed Mia's hand.

"Let's go away from here babe. Some slut is trying to get my attention." He said that and walked away. They were laughing. No, wait, he isn't like this.

I again went to him. "Please Will at least listen to what I have to say." I was huffing, I knew I was gonna cry. Ray, Stephan and Fabian came up.

People came out to see the drama. He grabbed my hand, tightly. "You, Samantha I thought you were better than this. Forcing your boyfriend to see your nudes hah." He said.

Huh? What did I just hear. I could feel my heart thumping, it's so loud, my chest hurts, it hurts, everything hurts. I stood straight and I just smiled at him.

He said, he doesn't wanna lose me, I thought he'd be with me. Hah, stupid, how stupid of me. Ahh, how to die. And then this popped in my mind.

I'm gonna buy a new razor blade and cut. I will die. Yeah, I need to die. What's the fucking point? Video, nudes, what next? Porn? Hah and I thought I could live a happy life.

I could feel tears starting to well up in my eyes, I held them back. I ran to the classroom, picked my bag and ran out. I saw him, them and all the other people from the corner of my eyes.

Yeah, wouldn't it be better if I die? Would they care, cry? They wouldn't. "Samantha!" I heard Ray calling for me. What's the point of stopping now?

I ran to my home. Everything was empty, kinda. Not many people were outside. Shaoli is in school and mum is also in school. I stood in front of the stores.

I wiped my tears away and took some blades. I gave it to the cashier. He looked at me but didn't ask anything. I bought 5 blades. Yeah they are enough.

I took them and ran to our house again. I unlocked the door and ran to my room. I thought if I can do it or not. I don't care, I need to do it.

I put the bag down and pulled one blade out. I've never cut with blades. But I put it over my wrist of my left hand. I took a deep breath in and out. It's scary, it's scary to cut.

But then I shook out all the thoughts of not being able to cut and pulled the blade down. It cut through my skin, it wasn't big at first but then it split apart, it hurts.

More, I need to cut more. I cut two times more. It was bleeding. The floor was getting red. Ah I forgot to lock the door. Someone opened the door. Ahh my head feels heavy.

Haha, I can't keep my eyes open. Why's the bed so hard and cold? Ahh. I think I'll fall asleep, my body feels numb.