January 3, 1990 - Daffodils (Part 2/3)

Candy was heart broken. Everything she believed was now coming into question. Each and every fragment of her memory wouldn't fit in anymore. It just wouldn't make sense. The books always wrote how love can make you feel like you are in an ecstasy, but she never believed that love could hurt her in a way she could ever have imagined.

She felt like all the happiness she ever felt was about to ear her up and backfire. Memories would never be the same. Instead of a sweet recollection, all of it turned into hostile throwbacks.

After the brief realization of everything, she suddenly felt a glimpse of reality. Dark clouds start to group together, thunder was heard. Small raindrops were falling from the sky in an increasing frequency. It felt like even rain was ruining her day.

Looking into the distance, she saw a quite nostalgic and familiar sign. "Library, Open" , the bright neon signpost lit. She quickly rain into the building. "Finally, a place that's full of peace, quiet and a great way to retain homeostasis." she thought to herself.

After pushing the heavy glass doors of the library, what welcomed her was a very familiar setting. Each lighting from the yellow bulbs, the quiet and dead air of silence, the temperature of the thermostat, everything came into order. Maybe she could finally reconcile with herself again.

In a few corners into the library, she found her most favorite person and probably the one that could help her in this very moment, Ms. Ellen, her best friend and the university's librarian. Before they could actually communicate with each other without disturbing others, Candy and Ellen came up with a new medium of communication, they used post-it notes.

Anything bothering you? - ELLEN

Major broke up with me. -CANDY

That jerk? I knew he was bad news from the start. What was the reason? - ELLEN

He said he never loved me - CANDY

Candy could feel her eyes swelling up again. She could feel each pressing emotion gripping and crunching her heart. She's starting to feel breathless. Her hands numb, her feet asleep. She stars recollecting her memories once again. Each moment pains her. Each promise breaking like shards of glass, pierces her heart.

Realizing she wants to be left alone, wanting to drown herself in a sea of books and to never come out again, she opted to leave Ellen a last post-it note.

Talk to you later. Got to sort myself out first - CANDY

Ellen nodded in agreement, signalling her that it's fine. She starts walking around, reading around the electronically lit signs of each section. Circulars aisle, Magazines, Non-Fiction, History, Geography, Engineering and her personal favorite, Fiction. She quickly starts to scan for books to read in the fiction section, under Romance titles.

As she picks up a book that piqued her interest, she couldn't help it but feel immense disappointment. She feels that all along, these books felt more fictitious than ever. She just couldn't feel the same spark she had felt before. She feels that each and every word was turning more abstract and incomprehensible as ever.

The line that separates fiction and reality was even more apparent than it ever was. In a last attempt to try reading the last few lines of the first chapter of the book she's reading, she closed the book in anger, disbelief and disappointment.

Maybe she wasn't just feeling like reading fiction for now. Maybe the story she read was superficial, or was too juvenile. It doesn't matter. All she knew was that romance just wasn't her thing for now. She just needed to read something that felt real. In an attempt to do so, she quickly walks a few more aisles past the fiction section, until she reached the room marked with "School Archives".

She never went past the door that guarded the room, ever. Maybe she felt that it was too rustic for her taste, or was uninteresting, but considering that the room was not for unauthorized personnel to enter was enough to tick her off before. Even while she was working in the library last semester, she never was assigned to clean or scout the area.

Now piqued with curiosity, she suddenly feels an exciting urge to enter. "Ellen wouldn't mind." were the words Candy used to justify her actions.

The door was guarded by an RFID system, meaning it required a recognized personnel's identification card to enter. As for Candy, she has had a duplicate authorized personnel's identification card after having worked in the library. She just forgot to return it, and in her defense, they never asked it back.

A quiet beep was heard signalling her that it was okay for her to enter the room. She scouts the area full of books, documents and newspapers collecting dust. After minutes passed, across an old corridor, she stumbled upon an old dusty box. Sunlight had barely hit it. It was covered below a stack of books as if someone tried to hide it. It had a motif of a daffodil's petals.

Beaming with curiosity, Candy slowly opened the dusty box, which to her surprise, was squeaky clean inside. A fragrant aroma wafts around the small area. Inside the box contained a book, entitled "Bridge to Terabithia" by Katherine Paterson. Possessing great knowledge towards books, Candy quickly recognized the book, while murmuring "Ah, a 1977 classic."

Exploring on, she realized that inside the box, there were flowers. One was a dried Rose, another a drawing of a Gladiolus and the last one, was a frame of a Striped Carnations. On the side of the box were four envelopes with each a corresponding letter inside, all dating back to 1990.

Curiously, Candy opened the very first and the shortest letter, entitled; Daffodil.