Brandied Cherries

!!!TW!!!(mention of rape, teenage pregnancy)!!

Dan fell wearily into his shaky bed. He didn't want to acknowledge the dozen missed calls, he'd rather just fall asleep and never wake up again. However, he had a very bad intuition that did not let him rest.

Annie. It could be a big deal if she was looking for him so much. Dan pressed the callback button softly and gathered all his spiritual strength — of which, unfortunately, not too much remained after such a day.

„Where have you been?"a quiet voice answered the phone.

„Hello to you too. „Dan tried to joke around, but after the silence that greeted him, he added, "I'm sorry, I was at work. Is there something wrong?"

„Yes."

Dan sighed. Over the years of friendship, he learned that Annie didn't have to be asked what was wrong. If she wanted to open up, she did. If she didn't want to, then silent coexistence over the phone is the best therapy for her.

„I'm pregnant."

Silence again.

„I'm pregnant, Dan. Do you understand that?"

„I'm coming over." Dan declared, then hung up without waiting for an answer.

Dan has always been independent. His mother was already asleep, but if she had been awake, she would not have questioned the correctness of Dan's decision. Annie and the pregnancy… Dan couldn't really believe it. Is this a stupid joke?

***

Annie hated being alone. Newly, however, she learned that it was even worse to be alone in a room with someone who grew in her body, against her will.

In the dark room, her phone lit up: a message had arrived from Dan. "I'm here, open the window. <3"

Annie's parents were far stricter than Dan's mom, so the two friends had to get used to going in and out through the window at this time of the day. The boy had perfected his sneaking skills, he swung over the ledge without noise.

Annie stared at him blankly, the boy greeted her with a helpless smile.

„Just… Just hug me please." She muttered. Dan sat down beside her on the bed wordlessly, then, after a little bit of thinking, he hugged his friend.

„Come on, I'll be the big spoon." The boy whispered as they slowly laid down on the bed.

„But you don't like being the big spoon."

„I do now."

Her whole body trembled. Dan whispered into her ears, ran his fingers through her hair, but it wasn't until minutes that the shaking stopped. Annie took a deep breath.

„So… I didn't have my period since the beginning of the summer. I am having nausea lately. And my belly…" she weeped „My belly…"

„I can understand you, you don't have to say it." Dan reassured her. „Do you know who the potential father is?"

Annie didn't answer.

„Annie… Now you either don't know,-but I don't believe that- or you're ashamed of it. Which is stupid, you know you can tell me everything. Whoever's name you are going to say, I'm not going to get upset. I promise. Just believe me-„

„I was raped." Annie interrupted. Dan blinked in confusion. He had no idea what to say or whether he had heard it right

„Fuck". He finally whishpered with trembling voice. He knew he had to say more than that, but he had no idea what to do. Should he say that he is sorry about it? Should he ask questions? Or change the subject?

„Dan, I want to die."

„No, don't say that. The monster, who did this, should die. You didn't do anything wrong. Listen, as far as I know, you haven't even taken a pregnancy test yet, have you?"

„Yes but--"

„Then we can't be really sure that this is the case. Let's do a test tomorrow, okay?

Annie shook her head in disapproval.

„I do not want to. I do not want to know."

„Wouldn't it be better to be relieved?" Dan smoothed her arm.

„Yes, of course, but if it's positive?

„Then you didn't lose anything by the test."

"And if my parents see me in the store?"

„I'll buy it."

Annie had no more objections. Dan was right, it would be better to get over all of this.

- As for the other thing… Can you tell me a little bit about this? Who did it?" Dan couldn't decide if it was indecency, but he felt like he had to know everything. Annie turned around slowly to face Dan. She didn't seem to be nervous, just very tired.

„I won't go into details."

„You don't have to."

"So Helen had a house party in June, do you remember?" Dan nodded. "I was going home from there when it happened." I don't know who was it, he wasn't familiar. I'm sorry I haven't said anything so far." Annie rested her cheeks on the boy's chest. Dan felt tears begin to soak his shirt.

„I'm sorry I didn't know about this. I'm sorry I disappeared all summer. I should have been by your side." Dan's heart pounded with guilt. He let his best friend carry such a burden alone all summer. "I'll find out who did it and I swear I'll kill him." The boy growled. „Don't you remember anything? A face? A feature? One…"

„McKenzie… No. I don't want to talk about this. You know what I'm like when there's something wrong. It couldn't be taken out of me with pliers. Feel honored that I told you this now."

Dan stared at the ceiling silently. Luckily, Annie's eyes were closed so she couldn't see the boy's tears pouring out of his eyes.

"How about we figure out a password to say to each other if something's wrong? And so we could be there for each other, but still we won't have to emotionally strain ourselves.

"What do you have in mind?"

„Let's say… "I want to eat brandied cherries.""

Annie grimaced at Dan.

„I hate brandied cherries".

„So do I. That's why this's a perfect signal, we would basically never say that." Annie saw it in Dan's eyes how proud he was of this wonderful line of thoughts, so she didn't want to object.

„Good… But it could also be "Something's wrong, but I don't want to talk about it" maybe? Substantial and cannot be forgotten."

"I don't love you for your creativity, you better know that." Dan rolled his eyes. Even in the dark, he saw Annie's mocking smile. The lights of the main road lit up the girl's face and the room in stripes of orange colour through the shutters. The roughness of the bed and the noises outside gave Dan a special sense of comfort.

They spent a lot of time in this room, just the two of them, or perhaps awkwardly the three or four of them, when their current partners came over. Dan knew every corner of the little room. He knew exactly where the glass was cracked in the white closet, he knew every picture on the wall, he knew the names of every plushie of Annie. The only plant that had not withered by some divine miracle had always wandered through the room. It lived on the table, on the windowsill, on the floor. The girl's room always reflected her mental state, now the clothes and dirty dishes lying on the floor did not indicate too much good.

„Dan?" Annie broke the silence unexpectedly.

„Hmm?

„I like the password you suggested."

***

Early in the morning, Dan had to get up and leave so that Annie's parents wouldn't notice him when they wake up her. Annie was still asleep when Dan climbed out the window. He looked back once more at the girl lying in embryonic pose, then headed to the nearest drugstore. This was not the first time he had to buy a pregnancy test thanks to his sisters.

He didn't think he should be ashamed of this. It is less accepted for young girls to buy such things for some reason than for young boys. Curious eyes are constantly staring at what can be gossiped about, and what could be more interesting than a desperate teenage girl? It was a sick habit, but unfortunately it seemed to be unbreakable. Dan's sister also received a number of contemptuous looks as her belly began to grow spectacularly. For some reason people thought that she was more guilty than the child's father. The longer Dan thought, the angrier he got.

The bored cashier looked him once, but said nothing. As he stepped out and began to put away the test, a familiar voice spoke to him.

„Is that a pregnancy test?"

Dan hurriedly tucked the box into his bag, then looked up at the owner of the voice.

"Good morning to you too, Logan." Dan put his hands on his hips.

„ It's better than yours as I see."

"You don't always have to judge everybody."

"I didn't judge you, I don't care what happens in your life. I was just surprised, "Logan shrugged.

"Are you even meaner on the mornings than usually?"

„Sorry."

Logan stared at Dan for a while, then continued his way to the bakery beside the drugstore.

„See you at school." He looked back, then entered the bakery without waiting for an answer.

Dan wished to sink into the depths of the earth every time he met Logan. No one has ever hated him as much as this boy. It is going to be an unbearable year.