Chapter 42- Put this on

Wait for a second, I just remembered something.

''I can't stay'' I tell him as he closes the bedroom door behind us.

''Why?''

''Because Kate knows that I'm just going to dinner and then I'm coming back to the tent. She'll know something's up if I don't come back for the night'' I explain.

''Then just make something up'' He casually says and makes his way over to the couch.

It's not so easy for me to just make something up, I'm terrible at lying, she will know somethings up.

I make my way over to the couch than sit down next to him. I get my phone out and dial Kate's number.

''Be quiet'' I warn him and he rolls his eyes.

''Hey'' She says from the other end.

''Hey uhm... I won't be coming back tonight I'll be spending the night at home tonight because I just remembered that I signed up for this neighborhood clean up and it's tomorrow morning so I'll have to spend the night at home tonight to get there in time for the clean up'' I lie.

I don't know how I just came up with that so fast but I did.

''Oh... ok but couldn't you tell them that you're on an internship and you could do it when you get back'' She asks and I have no idea what to say.

''Uhm, no because the neighbors who are hosting it will be busy when I get back so this is the only time we can do it''

''Oh ok''

''Well I gotta go now'' I say. I can't bear anymore lying tonight.

''Okay bye, be safe'' She says.

''Bye you too'' I say and hang up.

''Wow you're good'' Hero looks at me.

''I hate lying like that, I felt like I've never lied so much in my life before'' I say and he doesn't respond he just gets up and heads to the kitchen

He returns back with what looks like juice in a glass. He clears the plate of food and feeds me after every spoonful he takes, I tell him I'm not hungry because we just came from dinner and I'm full but he insists that I eat some.

''You're gonna get me fat'' I tell him.

''Then I'll just have to give you a workout'' He winks at me and I giggle.

''You can't get fat you're naturally sexy'' He says and I feel my stomach tighten a bit from his choice of words.

''Anyone can get fat'' I tell him.

''Well if you are gaining weight then just go to the gym''

''I don't know, I don't even know anyone that goes to the gym and it'll be awkward going alone''

''Then just come with me''

''Really?''

''Why do you look so surprised?'' he asks.

''I just never thought you would say that you seem to only like to take me places alone when no one's around''

''That's because I don't like people'' he says and his expression changes and he looks a bit mad.

What did I do now? I didn't say anything to get him mad. He really is bipolar. He gets up from the couch and goes out into the hall.

I take my jacket off and hang it on the side of the couch. I have no idea what to do now so I just stand by his bedside table pretending to be occupied by my phone. He makes his way back into the room and closes the door behind him. He slowly makes his way over to me with a confused expression.

''What happened to your arm?'' He asks.

''You did that'' I tell him and he looks so shocked and worried.

''What? when?'' He asks.

''When we were at your father's house in the kitchen you grabbed my arm really roughly and pulled me back'' I tell him and before I know it his mouth is on the spot.

I feel his cracked lips gently sucking the area and right now I want his lips all over my body.

He slowly sucks the bruised area for a while then makes his way to my mouth. He kisses me slowly and softly at first before he picks up the pace and kisses me rougher and faster. He slowly pushes me back onto the bed and I sit down on the edge as he stands between my legs and bends down so that his lips reach mine. I let out a gasp as I hit the bed then his mouth goes down to my neck and I tilt my head back giving him full access to my neck. My hand is on his neck then in his hair as he bends down to suck my neck. He quickly moves back and holds his hands out for mine indicating for me to stand with him.

''Wait here'' He says and I do as I'm told then he exits the room.

He closes the door behind him not wanting me to see where he went. He returns back after what seems like forever with a bag in his hand and what looks like a suit or something in one of those garment carrier bags. What is that? He makes his way over to the bed then takes out the items in the bag.

''What is that?'' I ask and he doesn't answer.

He takes out a fake stick-on tattoo, some bright blue hair streaks then a pair of black high heels. The high heels have me shocked the most, they aren't regular high heels, they're lace to the front and the heel is thin and tall while the toes are supposed to be exposed at the front. I don't ask anything, I just continue to observe his actions as he moves over to the expose outfit hidden under the garment carrier bag, it's what I'm most keen to see. My mouth hangs open as he exposes the outfit, it's a bodysuit, it's a strapless black lace bodysuit. I've never really seen one in real before only that one time on tv when I was flipping through the channels and an erotic show came up with women wearing these and dancing on poles, I changed the channel immediately after I glimpsed it and tried to erase the image from my head.

Why did he bring this here?

Where did he even get this? Why does he have it?

''Put this on'' he says looking into my eyes.

''What?''

''Put this on'' he repeats.

''You've got to be crazy! I'm not wearing that you creep!'' I shout at him. He slowly walks up closer to me and puts both of his hands on my arm.

''Why not?'' He softly asks.

''Wha... What am I some kind of slut or stripper or something? Why do you want me to wear that?'' I ask with great worry in my eyes.

''You're neither of those things but it will just set the mood even more'' he says.

''What mood?'' I ask and he doesn't answer but his expression tells me exactly what mood he's talking about.

''I can't wear that'' I whisper.

''Do you know how sexy you would look it in? Come on just wear it, it's nothing'' he says.

He may not be anything for him but it is a big deal for me.

He stoops down and puts back the things in the bag except for the bodysuit then hands them to me.

''Go change in the bathroom'' he instructs and gently pushes me to the bathroom.

''But I don't wanna put it on'' I say.

''When you put it on and you see how incredibly sexy you look and you would be eager for me to see you and you'll can't wait to fuck tonight'' He says and I just look at him, he lets out a sigh then looks up for a moment before his eyes reach back to mine.

''We are not going to have sex tonight'' I tell him. He's crazy if he thinks I'm gonna do that with him.

''Why not? Don't you want me?'' He kisses me on the lips and pulls me closer to him so close that I can feel his breath on mine.

''I do but I can't'' I say.

''You can too, you can do whatever you want to do and I know you want this just as bad as I do'' He says and it's true I do want it but I promised myself that I wouldn't have sex until after marriage.

''I always promised myself that I wouldn't have sex until marriage'' I admit and he sighs.

''I can't I'm sorry'' I apologize and give him back the bag then walk to the door then out of his house but I stop just outside the cave.

I really do want him, I know that inside I do want to have sex with him, I really do but I can't. I remember Nelson and I's promise two years ago that we wouldn't rush anything with each other and we won't have sex until marriage. I can't do that to him, I can't have sex with Hero.

I have known Nelson almost all my life and I just met Hero two months ago and he has done and said horrible things to me, things Nelson would never even dream of saying.

Two years ago I thought that Nelson was the one, my childhood friend, my teenage boyfriend and my future husband for the rest of my life but now I don't know.

Now Hero has come into my life and I have never felt this way how I feel with him not with anyone before not even with Nelson. Hero is right, I can do whatever I want and I really do want this but at the same time I don't wanna hurt Nelson although I know I have already but I do really want this and for some reason it feels right although it's not.

I walk back inside his house then in his bedroom and Hero's now walking out of the bathroom. I run up to him and jump onto him with my legs wrapped around him. I hug onto him like I haven't seen him in months when really I just saw him about a minute ago. He hugs me back and I nuzzle into his neck before he sets me on the floor.

''Is everything alright?'' he asks and I don't answer, I just wrap my hands around his neck and starts kissing him.

''I wanna do it'' I tell him as I pull away.

He takes my hand in his and walks us over to the couch then he hands me the bag and the bodysuit.

''But I don't wanna put this on'' I tell him.

I would feel like some kind of slut or stripper wearing that because that's usually what they wear.

''Baby just go put it on, you won't look like any of those things to me. You'll still be the same Sia that I met and the one that I know. Nothing will change, you would just look different than you are used too but I would love it and so would you. Just try it on and if you still don't feel comfortable in it then just tell me and you won't have to wear it, but just try it. Just picturing you in that already makes me hard'' He finishes.

''Hero'' I say and shove him gently by his shoulder then we both laugh and I watch as a huge smile shoots across his face.

He puts both of his hands on both of my cheeks and pulls me in and he gives me a slow and deep kiss on the forehead. His words and his kiss soothes and calms me and he leads me into the bathroom.

''I'm already hard so don't take a whole 3 hours in there'' He tells me as I close the door behind him.

I make my way into the bathroom and make sure to lock the door behind me. I lay out everything in the bathroom and I give the bodysuit a few glances up and down. Am I really gonna wear this? I look at everything he gave me and ask myself so many questions before I really consider putting these things on. Why does he want me to wear this? Where did he get this? and what if it's not my size? What if it doesn't fit me? I'll be so happy if it doesn't.

My makeup is worn out now after the crying and all the drama that happened tonight but I just remembered that I have some BB Cream and lip gloss in my purse. I unlock the door and make my way out to the bedroom. I grab my purse from the couch but I notice that the room is empty. Hero's not in here.

Where is he?

I make my way into the living room and I check the entire house except for that door in the hallway with all the mysterious doors hidden behind it. I stand by the door in the living room for about five minutes and there's still no sign from him and now I'm officially perturbed. I can't help it! I need to see if he's out there. I exit the house and make my up the steps.

''Sia!'' he shouts in my face as we run into each other.

''What are you doing out here?''

''I should ask you the same question'' I tell him.

''I went to check something in my car'' he says.

''Get back inside'' he says and guides me back inside and as we get inside he shuts the door behind us that makes me jump.

''What the hell were you doing out there huh?''

''I was looking for you, why didn't you say that you were going outside to check something in your car?''

''Because I don't need to tell you my every move'' He snaps and anger takes over his face.

''What the hell is your problem? Why does your mood change every minute? You need to see a doctor and get medication for your bipolar'' I say and he relaxes.

What the hell is with him? A few minutes ago he was in such a calm mood and as soon as he went outside his mood changed and now he's trying to pick a fight with me for no reason.

''Why are you ruining the rest of the night?'' He asks his tone much lighter than before.

Gosh, he really is bipolar. He is so confusing.

''I'm not you are'' I whisper.

''Just don't make a big deal out of it, I was coming back just now so I didn't say anything and I thought you would be busy getting ready so you wouldn't even notice that I'm gone''

''I was but then I came out for my purse''

''Okay so no more distractions go back in and start getting ready'' He says and a small smile forms at the corner of his lips.

I make my way back into the bathroom and Hero sits down on the bed on his phone. I get inside to put on my makeup then the hairstreaks, I put them on several places in my hair and they actually look kinda good, I then move to the tattoo, it's a small butterfly tattoo and the instructions say that it goes on the upper part of the cheek just under the corner of the eye. After many tries, I finally put it on and I don't even recognize myself so far. I slip out of my dress and shoes and now I'm just in my bra and panties. I look in the bag and I also notice something else, something that he hadn't taken out, it's a bra.

The bra is black of course, his favorite color and it's strapless. I take out my bra and replace it with this one, to my surprise it fits me perfectly, my breasts are spilling out of the bra as I look at myself in the mirror. I then look at the bodysuit and take it off the hanger, I hold it up an examine it once more before I put it on. I put it on and it looks a bit weird, I think I put it on wrong, it looks weird by my hips. Oh, I now realize I'm not supposed to wear panties with it, Oh my god. I take the bodysuit off and slide my panty down my leg.

I then put the bodysuit back on and it looks different, I think this is how you're supposed to wear it. The bodysuit is lace and you can see everything through the thin lace, I feel naked and so exposed down there. I never thought that I would wear anything like this ever in my life, every time I glimpse them in the stores I just cringe and walk away not even wanting to be near one but here I am wearing one. After, I sit down on the toilet seat cover in the bathroom and put the high heels on. The high heels are exactly my size, they fit me perfectly. What? How does he know my size? He knows my size for everything, they all fit perfectly, they fit even better than the clothes I buy for myself. I move to stand up but hold onto the wall to keep my balance, the high heels are even higher than they look and very hard to walk in, they make me look so tall.

I walk over to the sink then practice walking in them for a while, my ankles almost twist a few times and I almost stumble over almost every step I take but after about 20 minutes of practicing to walk in them, I finally get the hang of it. I walk up and down the bathroom without holding onto anything just me walking in the heels. I look at my full outfit in the mirror and I'm stunned at my appearance. This isn't me, I don't recognize myself at all, I look really sexy I've gotta admit that but I still don't feel comfortable in it.

I feel so exposed, like I'm naked.

This is what strippers wear and I feel like one too, I feel like some kind of whore or something. Why does he want me to wear this? Doesn't he know me at all? My butt is hanging outside along with my breasts in this bra, I have a fake tattoo on my face, colored streaks in my hair and I'm wearing the highest heels of America, I can't let him see me like this, I'm practically naked and I feel uncomfortable, this is too much exposure.

''Sia, you done?'' He knocks on the door.

''Yeah'' I respond.

I look at myself up and down at least 5 times and I'm still not ready to go outside, I don't think I'll ever be, I don't want him to see me like this. I'm scared to go outside.

*Hey guys new chapter coming maybe Thursday or Friday so stay tuned*