Chapter 18 (Jangras POV) Are You Ready?

I looked at my father for a few moments, quite a bit sadly at the same time as well. It hurt me to see him like this all of the time now. It is not what my brother Plok would have ever wanted if he knew that he was going to die that day.

My father did not even look like a dragon that was even alive any more. He looked to be older than an elder dragon, and his body looked like he had not taken a bath or done anything to it in years. He was here though, and at least that meant something.

I was actually quite a bit surprised at first that he would be in here with us. I knew that he would be at the meeting to give away his role as the leader of our tribe. I shook my head though, as I knew I should not be having all of those questions right now.

We were here for a different reason, and which it was for, I was not quite sure of yet. I had only heard stories of dragons giving away their roles of leaders. It was none of my business to all that went on around the scenes in the first place.

But now it was, as I was beginning to realize. It finally dawned on me, as to what this night was about. I was now going to be the next leader of our tribe. It scared my to even think about it like that at the same time as well. I never expected it to be quite so soon.

I knew it would have happened once Socra finished training me in the first place, and she reprised her role as the deputy, such as my father was doing as the leader. I was supposed to have at least a hundred more years until I was going to take over leader.

It scared me quite a bit, as I looked over at my father, trying my best, to do what ever it was that could possibly stop him from making this decision. I stepped in front of the small group of 3 that was in front of us, and I looked at my father dead in his eyes.

All I could see was a reflection of nothing but a blank was, and weary eyes that were staring back at me. Almost as if I was staring out into the eternal void of nothing. It scared me to see my father like this as well, because I still remember when he was such a strong dragon.

Those days were long in the past now, and they were simply stories now. It was as if it was just some big fairy tale to listen to people speak of my father like that. It hurt me, because I knew just as good as Socra, as to the power that my father really wielded.

Socra looked as if she was going to step in for me, but she did not know what I was about to say to my father, so I stopped her before she said anything, and I began to step up to my father, as loud and as clear as I could, just as he had taught me how to be.

"My father... Himla... Please change your mind, please wake up and see how blind you are being right now. Our tribe needs you to lead them through these times... Your son... My brother... He would never want to see you like this, don't let his death be a vein memory from the past." I said to him, surprised at myself at the same time to even hear those words come out of my mouth the way they just had.

It was as if I was acting like a leader would be. It was scary to me to even think about as well. I gathered myself, and then I looked back over at my father. He had his head back down to the ground, and I was not sure what it was that he could possibly be thinking about at the exact moment.

I wondered if he was thinking about what I had just said to him. Or if he was just not thinking at all, or if he was just thinking about my brother. Or maybe all of them in the same instance as well. I knew that there was a spark that was still left in him, at least I hoped...

That spark seemed to be shut out right away, like a stream of water had just happened to crash down on it, as my father then looked back up at me with the same blank look in his eyes that I had just seen from him a few moments ago.

It made me lose all the hope, not just in my father... But the hope that any thing good could come back upon this cruel world that we were living in right now. I was not sure if it could get any darker, and if it could I did not even want to think of how.

My father was staring at me for a few moments, and just as I had thought that he had nothing left in him, I saw a glimmer, of whatever it was I was not quite sure of. It looked like pain and a lot of agony if I was going to be honest with myself.

Whatever it was that I had just seen, had seemed to disappear just as soon as I thought I might have seen it. I shook my head, and then looked away from my father, as I saw Socra bow her head to me a bit sadly at the same time as well.

We sat there for a few moments, as none of us said a word to each other. It was quite a few depressing moments of silence, and I had enough of that as it was. However, to my surprise my father decided to break the silence that was going in on the small little cave that we were in. I quickly spun my head over to him, to hear what it was that he had finally decided to say.

"I know that Jangra... I know that it is not what he would have wanted to see from me. Socra was like this too when she lost her husband, not quite the way I am, and your mother is in a ton of pain as well though she hides it, I see that you were hurt for a while, but you are stronger than all of the rest of us." He said to me. I looked at him for a few moments, and then I lowered my head to the ground this time.

I thought about what he had just said for quite a few moments. I knew that a part of him was right, but I was also not so sure at a part of it. People often liked to think so highly of me for some odd reason, though they did not know that I did not even believe in myself.

I also though about what he had said at the same time, in a different sort of way as well. What he had said, it also seemed like a bit of a sorry excuse. He was the leader of our tribe, he was meant to be stronger than the rest of us, so why could he not act like it?

I closed my eyes at the same time, as I did my best to drown out all of the thoughts that were swarming through my head at the same time as well. It was all coming on me like a bit of a nasty flood, and it was too much for my brain to handle.

Luckily, just as I had thought that it was too strong for me to build a wall to stop all of it, I heard Socra speak up from the side of me, that managed to drown out all of those thoughts at the same moment as well. It made me feel a bit better for the time being.

"Its no use, Jangra, I have tried many other times to do the same. It is a lot different for a father when he loses his own son... We could give him a few years to calm down a bit, but unfortunately we do not have that time on our hands right now." She said to me. I looked at her for a few moments, and then my head dropped to the ground once again.

I hated all of this, and I wish that all of it were not true... I wish that all of it would go away as well. But it was real, and these were the days that we were living in now, sadly... I stared at the ground for a few moments longer, until to my surprise my father managed to speak up once again.

I sat there for a few moments, almost wanting to drown out his voice, but at the same time I knew that I could not do that as well. These next few moments could potentially be the most important moments in my life, and I knew I could not try to shake it all away.

"Jangra... She is right... And I believe in you, while I see that you do not believe in yourself... You are the strongest dragon I have ever seen... Even stronger than Plyma... This is your destiny, and I can not hold you down from it any longer." He said to me. I stared at him for a few moments, as I breathed it all in quite a bit heavily as well.

It was indeed a lot to take in... What he had just said to me. It was very scary to me as well, and I wanted to pretend none of this was in fact real. I wanted to wake up in a bed right beside my brother, and I wanted this all to go back to the day that I was supposed to get my job as the next leader.

But then again, I also realized that all of this was written through destiny, and there was no trying to change how a destiny was meant to be. You might be able to change a couple of small things here and there, but you could not just wipe it off of the earth, as if it had never been told.

I sat there a bit sadly for just a few more moments, taking it all in, and grieving at the same time. Not just for the loss of my brother, but it was also for the loss of my father. All of this for what? Why were the black dragons even doing this in the first place?

To prove a point? To pretend as though they were the superior dragons? I looked at the ground for a few moments longer, and then I began to get angry as I thought of a certain black dragon in specific... It hurt me a lot to think about her as well...

Just as I had fallen in love with her, she had betrayed us, and the had written on the death of my brother as well. I did not know why life had to play with me like that... I fall in love with one dragon that tries to kill me, and the other one kills my brother.

I closed my eyes, trying to clear those thoughts from my head at the same time as well. Because I knew that I was going to be speaking to Yikla in private in just a few days. If I thought like that while I was with her, I might very well kill her at the same time.

I shook my head, I knew that I had to come with an open mind when it came to that private meeting that we had planned on. I just had a feeling that she was going to try some thing to seduce me. It was going to fail for sure, she did not know that I was no longer in love with her.

I opened my eyes, as I remembered what my father had just said to me as well. I was glad to take out all of those thoughts at the same time too. I did not like to think of all those sorts of thoughts that were on my mind practically all of the time.

I looked at my father, as I saw that this time he had some more emotion in his eyes. It looked like it was some sort of emotion, as if he almost had hope in some sort of way. I was not so sure as to what it was that he might have hope in though.

I sat there for a few moments more, as I then finally decided to speak up to the dragon, that was also my father. I spoke with a strong, and sturdy tone in my voice as well. It made him feel a lot better about all of this, and it was even a surprise to me to even hear me speak like that at the same time as well.

"I wish that you would not give up like that though... I am still so young, and there is a lot that you could teach me still. I love you father, and your son is still with you, believe me..." I said to him. He looked at me for a few moments, and then he nodded.

His emotions seemed to disappear once again, and I turned my head away from him. I saw Socra squint her eyes at me from the corner of my eyes as well. I thought about why that might be so for a few moments as well, but then it dawned on me at that moment.

I remembered that I had lied to her about seeing my brother in some weird dreams, and visions that I had been having. I looked down at the ground, as I remembered telling her that. It had been a big mistake as well, and on any case I should no longer be the next deputy for lying to her like that.

I was not sure if she still let me have that role, if it were due to me coming out and telling her that I had lied, her caring about me, or if it were her thinking at the same time that she could not just take that away from me, since I was indeed meant to be the dragon of destiny.

I had a feeling it was more meant at the last one that I had thought about. She knew that if I was not the deputy, than it meant that the thing that the oracle had told everyone would never come true... It would mean not only the death on all humans, but also the death on all of the red dragons as well.

I closed my eyes, as I saw that my father had turned his head away from me, clearing meaning to tell me that he had no thoughts of responding to what I had just said to him. It hurt me quite a bit as well. I tried my best to just simply shake it off, and pretend to be the dragon that I was meant to be.

It just hurt me so much though, and I hated to see my father, who was such a strong dragon, be as weak as he was right now. I knew that he was not the only dragon that was in that current pain right now... But he was our leader, or at least, he used to be... That was the reason that we were hear in the first place right?

Just as I thought of it that way, my head swiveled over to Socra, as she began to speak to me. I could see that she was in a lot of pain as well, much like my father was, though she had already lost all that she had ever cared about quite a long time ago.

I looked at her, as she was staring me down, making sure that I was paying full attention to what it was that she was going to say to me. I looked at her for a few moments, and then I nodded to her, to let her know that it was safe for her to speak, and to also let her know that I was listening to what it was that she had to say to me.

She looked at me, and then she nodded back to me, as I looked at her dead in her eyes, just to let her know for a fact that I was listening to what it was that she was about to say to me. She nodded to me once again, as I could tell as well that it was more of a nod to herself as she began to speak.

"Okay Jangra... This next part is going to be very important... So I just need to make sure... Are you ready?